Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Arizona State attendee Jimmy Kimmel. It hasn’t happened yet, but if his show ever overwhelms him while on the air, expect the Sun Devil in him to take over, as he’ll flop around faking an injury in hopes that a mercy commercial break will be cut to. Go Sun Devils!


• #1 Oregon beat #463 UCLA last night. Soundly.

ESPN’s Ted Miller was there and evaluated the goings-on.

Statistics were compiled and published. Just like Florida‘s offense but with more digits everywhere.

The Ducks used giant placards with hieroglyphics to call plays. Some of those placards had pictures of ESPN personalities on them, much to the amusement of ESPN personalities.

UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel was not amused by any of the above.

• The Pac-Twen division and championship game details have been set. Now let’s see if people will be able to watch the games on their newfangled picture boxes.

• Notre Dame WR Michael Floyd is questionable for tomorrow’s Navy game. Somebody has to say it — hamstrings are giant a-holes.

• If you’re a fan of Bruce Hornsby‘s piano playing, original lyrics railing against the BCS, and slow motion clips of college football games from the past decade, I may just have a link for you.

• Maryland OT Pete DeSouza hurt himself riding a scooter. Unfortunately, I read this article while riding on my scooter and am now myself injured. Meta-scooting is a bitch.

• The Big Tenelve is changing its championship tiebreaker rules, presumably after Texas was left out of the conference championship game in 2008. I’d love to be on board with this, but it’s become increasingly difficult to feel bad for Texas after they let whatever it was that Oregon beat last night run them up and down the field.

• Oklahoma WR Dejuan Miller will miss the remainder of the season after he tore meniscus in his right knee. The recovery time is about five months, but Miller should be back on the sideline in no time to see the Sooners start losing to inferior teams*.

* ©Bob Stoops.

A National Guardsman (and Michigan fan) got onto the field with two unloaded M16 assault rifles. It really is a blow to Michigan’s sterling reputation as a state not having crazy backwoods militia types who care too much about college football. Oh. Wait.

• Auburn QB Cameron Newton admits that, despite his success and happiness at Auburn, his heart is still at Florida. This shouldn’t be taken the wrong way — he wanted to finish what he started in Gainesville with the friends he made during his time there. Well, there if Dan Mullen were still there. Let’s not go crazy.

Two Arizona State football players stole laptops, an XBox, and some XBox games from a dorm room. It’s now officially the most national video exposure the ASU football program has received all season. Pac-10 TV deal!!

•’s Austin Murphy profiles Auburn QB Cam Newton. As you’d expect from an SI magazine feature writer, the words read good. Doi.

The site also has a midseason report predicting various end of the season outcomes. Apparently, they all still believe in rainbows, unicorns, and Boise State securing a national title berth. And SVBFF George Schroeder loves teams from the state of Oklahoma. Oowee.

• USC may run the some form of the spread offense next year. It’s October 22 and USC is talking about overhauling next year’s offense. Still, some brahs are stoked.

• Arkansas QB Ryan Mallett has been cleared to play against Ole Miss tomorrow after suffering a concussion during last week’s Auburn game. This understandably came as a relief to Arkansas coach Bobby Petrino, who couldn’t offer a quote, as he was running to catch a flight. Wait, did he say where he was going? Oh no … not again!!!!


Today’s Video of the Day honors the simultaneous existence of Skittles and bowling college.


Enjoy your Friday + College Football Saturday.