Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Steve Jobs, Reed College attendee.

*****

• Oregon beat Cal. LaMichael James‘s elbow popped out before James himself popped it back in. He’s more of a man than you or I will ever be.

• Cal fans react to the third quarter Oregon onslaught.

• TCU is going to the Big 12. Probably.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd has a weekend watch list and other such musings.

• CBS’s Bryan Fischer says there’s nothing quite like Texas football. Well okay, then.

• Watch Western Michigan. They’re not that bad. Seriously.

• Stanford‘s punter has a pretty boring job.

• ESPN‘s bloggers have things to watch.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans profiles Texas OC Bryan Harsin.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly answers your questions.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a never-before-aired “Here’s to the Crazy Ones” Apple ad narrated by Steve Jobs.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=8rwsuXHA7RA

Enjoy your Friday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan rifle through all the Week 5 action and examine their lingering trust issues with Ohio State, Clemson, and Texas.

Ty and Dan talk about Texas A&M’s move to the SEC, Mark Richt’s hot seat, poor sportsmanship, and all the important action ahead in the second week of the season.

Ty and Dan kick off their fourth season as hosts of The Solid Verbal by reviewing the news of the week, reading a handful of Verballer messages, and previewing the biggest games of 2011′s opening weekend.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Vassar attendee Anthony Bourdain. If you haven’t seen this week’s No Reservations in Cajun country, you must hate food. Or have other, more interesting things to do with your time.

*****

• Texas A&M will apply to leave the Big 12. Hurray.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd likes Oklahoma as a wire-to-wire #1 team. Or he just needed to write a column.

• Eight Miami players have been suspended for the season opener at Maryland. Guess Jacory Harris‘s confidence will have to wait another week.

• Oklahoma State is down two players for their opener Saturday. They’ll be fine.

• Joe Bauserman is your new Ohio State starting QB. It’s the sort of news that makes you gently nod your head and quietly say, “That’s reasonable” to yourself.

• SmartFootball’s Chris Brown breaks down the “inverted veer/dash read.” You may have seen it run by such undefeated teams as TCU and Auburn. Good enough.

• ESPN has “Sweet Beginnings,” which is either a series of profiles about new players and coaches, or an uncomfortable foray into graphic stories of passion.

• UCLA will play two QBs against Houston. It’s just what they do.

• Wondering about B1G Leaders? Wonder no more.

• Ditto Legends.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples talks Jarrett Lee.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel works overtime.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is John Kransinski and Alec Baldwin and their tomfoolery. Worth it for 9-1-2.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=5EUTEPFq5iQ

Enjoy your Wednesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan fly solo and preview 10 non-automatic qualifiers (Boise State, TCU, Air Force, San Diego State, UCF, Houston, Tulsa, SMU, Florida International, and BYU).

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Maryland grad Larry David. Curb was fantastic Sunday and now the Terps get new gear. It’s always good to be LD.

*****

• The LSU players involved in last week’s Baton Rouge bar fight could face felony battery charges.

• The number of Miami players with eligibility issues going into the opener sits around 15. This seems worrisome.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd talks TCU and CBS’s Jerry Hinnen previews the entire Mountain West. Tag Team back again.

• Seth Doege is officially Texas Tech’s starting QB. Not a surprise.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett speaks with Michigan QB Denard Robinson.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg has Wisconsin depth chart notes. (Theres a “1″ next to Russell Wilson‘s name)

• A list of SEC newcomers to file away. Also, SEC scrimmage notes exist.

• Notes from the last Boise State scrimmage can be read.

• Fox’s Gus Johnson visits Tempe (in a private jet) to visit ASU. Let’s all pretend like he isn’t wearing a shirt with his own catchphrase on it, ok?

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly gets his Norman on.

• Whatever, I like the new Maryland helmets.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel picks Dana Holgorsen’s brain. I like.

• SI.com hired EDSBS and SB Nation’s Holly Anderson. She immediately does work re: LSU.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is outtakes from the Food Network’s Sandra Lee. HOMEMADE.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-VNg9y4pB4

Enjoy your Tuesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by lovely Emerson College alum Maria Menounos. Don’t be funny around her.

*****

• The death penalty may be a thing for Miami.

• Auburn named Barrett Trotter its new starting QB. I’m guessing yards will be amassed.

• Washington RB Chris Polk had minor knee surgery and will miss the next three or four weeks. Adjust your Husky thoughts accordingly.

• Oregon QB Darron Thomas says he was asleep in Cliff Harris’s speeding car. I buy it.

• The MRI on TCU QB Casey Pachall‘s bum shoulder (from an actual bum!) was negative. Which is positive.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews TCU. Their line graph looks like a scary mouth, which seems about right.

• Dr Saturday‘s Big 12 Week comes to a close. Get it while the gettin’s good.

• Fox’s Gus Johnson talks to Oregon. BUSINESS.

• ESPN’s David Ubben profiles Missouri QB James Franklin.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett has Notre Dame recruiting updates. The little guys are finally making a move.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans profiles Houston QB Case Keenum. Virginity is broached.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples has an SEC preview. Read: It’s ClowneyTime.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is orangutans just trying to stay cool.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=OMFRZn6HpyA

Enjoy your Friday. Work it.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan discuss the bombshell report putting Miami under the microscope, conference expansion rumors, key injuries around college football, and plow through overflowing voicemail and e-mail inboxes.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by the number one Miami fan (and graduate) in national TV news, Chuck Todd. I’ll bet he’s working for the weekend.

*****

• The death penalty has not been broached by the NCAA re: Miami.

• There is no NCAA realignment summit, according to NCAA president Mark Emmert. That’s what they want you to think.

• Boston College RB Montel Harris will miss some time (and possibly BC‘s opener) after undergoing knee surgery. This hits close to home — we feel what Spaziani feels.

• Miami coach Al Golden wanted a little heads up, that’s all.

• LSU coach Les Miles now says WR Russell Shepard could possibly sit out the Oregon game after all while his compliance issue gets sorted out. Oops.

• Florida released a statement indicating that their players mentioned in the Yahoo! Miami report are cleared to play. Whew.

• Same goes for Kansas State’s Brown brothers, they of paper and high school fame.

• ESPN’s Chris Low asks Auburn QB questions. I’d answer, but my lawyer has advised me against any such action.

• Wisconsin AD and former coach Barry Alvarez (and son) lost over a million dollars to the Ponzi scheme of former Miami booster Nevin Shapiro.

• Former Miami AD Paul Dee wanted the guillotine dropped on USC. He has some ‘splaining to do.

• I apparently went to the wrong UCLA practice.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews the “invisible” USC Trojans.

• SI.com’s George Schroeder has a Pac-12 preview.

• Central Florida has mail!

• Penn State still needs a quarterback.

• Nebraska CB Alfonzo Dennard has a bum leg. Not an actual bum’s leg, but rather just an injury. I’m positive you needed that clarification.

• TCU QB Casey Pachall (“Pa-ha” is what I’m told) has a bum shoulder. This one ACTUALLY IS a bum’s shoulder.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a guy dancing with a bottle opener in front of a cheetah mural. A senior citizen makes a cameo.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=BkdIVJ3Nngo

Enjoy your Thursday. Support support support. 

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Regis Philbin, who apparently attended and graduated from Notre Dame. Who knew?

*****

• If you’re the last person who hasn’t read it, here’s Yahoo!’s Will Lyles/Oregon story.

• CBS’s Bryan Fischer ponders independence and major football programs.

• The body of Purdue RB Sean Matti was found in a Lake in Indiana. Unspeakably tragic.

• Former UNC DE Mike McAdoo is suing UNC and the NCAA for reinstatement. Nancy Grace is outraged.

• Illinois DL Chris Jones was charged with battery. At least he didn’t have cocaine on him like the last time he was arrested, right?

• Alabama QB A.J. McCarron has a sizable sternum tat. Reason for concern?

• SI.com’s Andy Staples brings the noise with his Cheating for Dummies column.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly includes Yo La Tengo in his USF preview. Also, Bill Connelly never stops.

• Neither does Rivals’s's’s's’s UCF preview, apparently.

• South Carolina DE Jadeveon Clowney is officially a South Carolina DE. Must’ve been waiting for all of the AP results to come back.

• Want Rich Rodriguez’s Michigan house? Sure you do! (via Dr Sat)

• Auburn needs a QB. Soon.

• The Big East has defensive lines, so ESPN feels compelled to rank them.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett echoes what we talked about last week — new Wisconsin QB Russell Wilson is good, but the greatness talk needs to be scaled back.

• The B1G has LBs. But you knew that already.

• A giant combine/tournament is going on on the Nike campus in Portland. ESPN has first-day stories.

• Cincinnati QB Chazz Anderson (DOUBLE Z!) has transferred to Buffalo. RIP multiple Chaz(z)es in the Big East.

• Georgia assistant recruiting coordinator Charles Canton got the hell out of Athens. Peculiar?

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel looks at the B1G challenges ahead for Nebraska.

• Vanderbilt decided to pull a Stanford and recruit smart kids that can also play football.

• Maryland OL Justin Lewis is now persona non grata in College Park, MD.

• Top incoming Texas DT Quincy Russell failed to qualify for the Longhorns.

• Incoming Alabama RB Dee Hart may have torn an ACL. Or maybe not.

• Rivals profiles new Texas Tech DC Chad Glasgow, who promises to be better than the last guy, Chad Edinburgh.

• The Longhorn Network is getting two 2011 Texas games. Hurray!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is mustachio’d monkeys being fascinated by an iPod touch. Of course.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=2nP73LFhcKY

Enjoy your Wednesday. Buy clothing!

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by UCLA alum Christine Lakin, who played on Al on ABC’s Step by Step. Wanna feel old? She’s 32 (but still has it!). (ahem, Christine: solidverbal@gmail.com)

*****

• The lawyer of Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor questions 90% of the SI story. I’m feeling even better about the article already.

• Similarly, lawsuits are being threatened over SI’s investigative piece. I have a feeling the follow up to this story will include the phrase, “never materialized.”

• West Virginia OC Dana Holgorsen is now clear on the expectations the school and the state have no the whole “not getting tossed out of casinos” thing.

• Former Notre Dame and current Montana QB Nate Montana (get it?!?!) was arrested for suspected DUI. Not cool.

• Penn State OC Jay Paterno says athletes are already getting paid dozens of dollars an hour for the work they put in athletically. Of course, his math is all poorly constructed and he leaves out revenue figures for schools. Other than that, bang-up job, sir.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples argues that, while Steve Spurrier‘s plan won’t happen, it’s an important step towards a payment discussion.

• Maryland and Connecticut each had offensive footprints last season. Football Study Hall takes you inside the magic.

• Tim Tebow was on The Daily Show. Bloomin’ Onions were implied.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson answers some basic TCU/Big East questions. It’s all she can do to not say TCU is going to swallow up USF.

• Former Georgia RB Washaun Ealey has transferred to Jacksonville State. Gentlemen, get your moving violation ticket pads rrrreeeaadddyyyy!!!

• Will Ohio State‘s recruits hang around? Fox Sports’s Zac (no K, no H) Johnson further pontificates.

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) tries to crack the SEC Lion King Twitter code. I’m so lost.

• Some quick thoughts on noisemakers on the SEC by EDSBS fanposter “RaginCajunRebel.” Remember to get sucked into the amazing comment vortex.

• Former Michigan QB Tate Forcier visited San Jose State. Come for the football, stay for the obscene burritos.

• Mel Kiper is totally down with high school 7on7 tournaments. Just so you know.

• Hot/Cold Yes/No UCF QB recruit DeMarcus Smith has chosen to stick with UCF. This is actually news.

• The purple and gray field at Central Arkansas is coming along just fine, thank you.

• Arizona needs snitches ASAP.

*****

Today’ s Video of the Day is Orson Welles sleepwalking through a commercial shoot. I could watch this forever and ever.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFevH5vP32s

Enjoy your Friday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Athens, GA native Kim Basinger, who probably doesn’t know Jake Scott, recent College Football Hall of Fame inductee from Georgia. She also probably doesn’t know that her scenes in Wayne’s World 2 made me feel all funny inside. Probably.

*****

• SI.com’s Andy Staples has a post-spring Top 25. Ty’s already excited.

• The Daily’s Dan Wolken takes down the APR system.

• CBS’s Brett McMurphy weighs in on Big East expansion in the wake of the mammoth Pac-12 TV deal. Apparently, the Big East wants some pie.

• EA Sports’s NCAA 12 lets you screw around with conference and bowl alignment. And the Big East takes another early hit.

• Former Ohio State basketball player Mark Titus comments on the little he knows (or doesn’t) regarding Ohio State football players and their automobiles.

• Want coach’s cam angle game film from Auburn/Oregon, TCU/Wisconsin, and Stanford/Oregon? Follow this link, friend. (via EDSBS)

• Fox Sports South profiles Alabama RB Trent Richardson and even trots out pictures of Florida cheerleaders to bolster their content. Heroic.

• Football Study Hall slaps Purdue around with rock hard data. And sexy line graphs.

• Georgia alum and new College Football Hall of Fame inductee Jake Scott is a man.

• SI.com’s Bill Carey makes the case for ten possible early enrollee impact players.

• LSU coach Les Miles is/was a greased-up, sculpted man machine.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Bert sitting down with SNL’s Andy Samberg. Yes, that Bert.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nhDIlSdpV-c

Enjoy your Tuesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ohio State alum and noted enthusiasm curber, Richard Lewis. Great, thanks Jim Tressel, another thing for Lewis to get bummed out about. Just great.

*****

• SI Video has a great video piece about the University of Alabama and the recent tornado. Incredibly for SI, it’s not a writer on the phone passed off as “video.”

• Keep following the Wiz of Odds‘s takedown of bowl deals with his ongoing expense report series.

• The NCAA, being the all-powerful oversight organization that they are, answered questioning from the Department of Justice with a simple, “Not us, go ask them.”

• West Virginia AD Oliver Luck doesn’t think it’d be the worst thing in the world if Mountaineer fans got a little drunker. (That sentence came out more misleading than even I could’ve intended.)

• CBS Sports’s Brett McMurphy talks to Florida coach Will Muschamp about how he got hired and what the former Texas coach sees in OC Charlie Weis. Hint: it’s not QB John Brantley running the option.

• Purdue‘s getting new uniforms. If there was any sense in the world, they’d feature a giant picture of Ryan Kerrigan, with the words, “He Went Here” underneath. Unfortunately, they’ll probably just look like this.

• Colorado DE Forrest West, who seems quite pleased with himself in his team photo, is transferring to NC State. I don’t need to hope he’s happy — I already know.

• South Carolina RB Marcus Lattimore is in decent shape. And by that I mean, his leg may contain more power than Ty and I do combined. Even if you add in some of our extended family members, I think we’re still just approaching Lattimore.

• Former TCU safety Tejay Johnson is completely awesome at life.

• SB Nation’s Football Study Hall continues to not sleep and pump out numbers that try to explain and preview teams. Washington and Northwestern the latest FBO treatments.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel wonders if Arizona State can be this year’s Auburn and come out of nowhere to be national title contenders. The Solid Verbal’s Dan Rubenstein has seen ASU play and politely disagrees with any of this wondering nonsense.

• Rivals profiles new Clemson OC Chad Morris, who will forever be known as “the guy who screwed Clemson up” or “the guy who got Clemson over the hump,” and nothing in between.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is an oldie, but still maintains its crown has the greatest Black Eyed Peas cover (or for that matter, performance) of all time.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=QlfO1C2QcvY

Enjoy your Thursday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan delve into 10 non-AQ teams and preview an underrated and surprisingly deep group of teams outside the six major conferences.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by the newly single Arnold Schwarzenegger, a University of Wisconsin-Superior correspondence graduate and lover of all things derriere.

*****

• After receiving an extension, Northwestern coach Pat Fitzgerald will be continuing his reign of efficient spread passing terror through at least 2020. TERROR.

• Georgia RB Washaun Ealey will soon be (other team) RB after being granted his unconditional release from Georgia. If he becomes dominant wherever he goes, I’m calling dibs now on a nickname of “The Moving Violation.”

• Missouri QB Tyler Gabbert (younger brother of Sunshine Gabbert) announced his intention to transfer, with Clemson, according to his father, as a possible landing spot. Despite no college passing attempts, Mel Kiper already lists him on the big board.

• Four Miami players of minimal consequence are transferring. Oh well.

• Football Study Hall gets down and dirty with Duke. Not pretty.

• TCU doesn’t return a ton, but they’ve done enough to warrant a spring wrap from ESPN. It’s to be expected that MLB Tank Carder will hunt you down if you don’t click the link.

• Yahoo!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday examines TressellBall. What, you thought you were done with Craig Krenzel? NEVER!!

• Earlier in the offseason, Rutgers added former Pitt and Cal offensive coordinator Frank Cignetti to install an actual offense. For those expect an immediate impact, take a slow look at that resumé once again.

• USC WR Brice Butler announced his decision to transfer before announcing his decision to remain a Trojan. Without any knowledge to support this, due credit should be given to USC’s new on-campus Chick-fil-A. Works wonders.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Rafael Nadal getting fancy between his legs. Never hesitate to send me trick tennis shots. Never.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=mevFnV5rCuI

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Ty and Dan take a look around the national college football scene with SI.com’s Stewart Mandel.  What will come of the federal inquiry into the BCS?  What happens to Jim Tressel in the wake of turmoil in Columbus?  Who is the better pick in the Mountain West, Boise State or TCU?  All that and much more, plus Verballer voice messages, and an awkward conversation about Michael Bay making, well, a different kind of movie.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Columbia alum Art Garfunkel. Why? Just look at him. He’s Art Garfunkel, damnit.

*****

• Ohio State AD Gene Smith talks about his “nightmare” situation with Jim Tressel.

• CBS’s Tony Barnhart has ten burning SEC questions. If the burning continues tomorrow morning for Mr. Barnhart, I recommend a trip to a physician for antibiotics and a stern talking-to about life decisions.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel isn’t thinking happy thoughts about Auburn‘s immediate future. HATERZ!!

• Former Alabama RB Mark Ingram is your NCAA 12 cover model, beating out Auburn’s Nick Fairley and two overvalued NFL Draft prospects.

• Iowa State coach Paul Rhoads punches a moose. AC-TING!!

• If you guessed “deer antler” as the source of a secret supplement that Auburn players used last year to supposedly heal faster, you have chosen wisely.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson visited TCU and has some double dashes to report.

• She also got some voice time with Boise State coach Chris Petersen. The usual topics were broached.

• Iowa State doesn’t quite seem to have a QB yet. Here’s to hoping I don’t have to copy/paste that in early October.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg visits Wisconsin and spends most of his space explaining why the Badgers can’t really complete a pass yet.

• Fox Sports’s Lisa Horne profiles incoming UCLA freshman QB Brett Hundley. Apparently, he has a magnificent smile.

• Don’t drop USC QB Matt Barkley‘s passes or run the wrong route. Just… don’t.

• Northwestern QB Dan Persa‘s achilles is coming along nicely. You know, for an achilles that completely exploded.

• New San Diego State coach Rocky Long isn’t a fan of Boise State’s blue turf. Boohoo.

• South Carolina hearts Phil Collins.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is proof that, even if you don’t like the Foo Fighters, a giant band playing in a random guy’s garage is always cool.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWciVk_-5eo

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Reese Witherspoon, one time Stanford student. Perhaps she was bummed that we had Jeff Tedford on and had a glorious time talking Cal football. It’s fine, Reese, we know where your heart really is.

*****

• Michigan State OT Arthur Ray is again practicing after the 2007 removal of a cancerous tumor from his leg. We wish him many healthy pancakes.

• CBS’s Bryan Fischer visits Fort Worth to break down TCU’s revamped roster. I really did think the use of “revamped” would sound better than it did.

Speaking of which, take a look at TCU’s Rose Bowl ring. It’s essentially a bejeweled golf ball.

• Do you have the CBS Sports Network (formerly CBS College Sports)? Do you like Mountain West games? Have I got news for you!

• Bruins Nation breaks down the Pac-12 TV contract possibilities. Every single time the word “Fox” appears in print when people discuss this story, it bums me out just a little bit.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller has notes on Stanford’s defense. I couldn’t find anything on LB Chase Thomas practicing the ol’ fake knee injury. Look harder, Miller. Look harder.

• Yahoo!!!!’s Dr. Saturday turns his QB focus to Darron Thomas, booger-pick and all.

• ESPN’s David Ubben predicts the Big 12′s 1000-yd rushers. A Bryce Brown sighting!

• ESPN’s Chris Low does the same for the SEC, but only lists Alabama RB Trent Richardson at #2. Do you not understand that he may in fact be better than Mark Ingram? Sheesh.

• Cal WR Tevin Carter left the Bears and returned home, the assumption being that Carter has no interest in continuing a football career elsewhere.

• Clemson coach Dabo Swinney talks spring football. And classic American hairstyles.

• Mr SEC has the details of alleged payments and inappropriate contact between an Alabama booster and LB signee Brent Calloway. Fun.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the fake Windows 7 commercial with a storm trooper.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=zr04FBKPS9E

Enjoy your Friday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Michigan alum Rich Eisen, who, if the NFL lockout continues, could find himself with a lot of time to enjoy Michigan Stadium’s new video board.

*****

• Iowa DB Willie Lowe, one of the Hawkeye players who suffered from rhabdomyolysis, asked for his release from the program.

• Arizona State took a big hit with star CB Omar Bolden and WR TJ Simpson both going down with torn ACLs. They’ll still beat Arizona.

• ESPN’s Heather Dinich predicts 1,000 yd ACC running backs and has now decided to include my new favorite, Wake Forest RB Josh Harris. ‘Bout time.

• TCU has new uniforms and helmets.

• ESPN’s Chris Low has an Arkansas status update. As far as I can tell, the Hogs and RB Knile Davis are In a Relationship. See what I did there?

• A Pac-12 Network is a “done deal” for 2012. I’m already aimlessly sending out my resumé.

• More of those Ohio State gold pants medallions have hit the open market … on the History Channel. Cool?

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg has some observations from Buckeye practice in Columbus. Quick, somebody check his pockets for gold pants!

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett does the same from Pitt. He seems keen on coach Todd Graham.

• Fox Sports Florida looks at the new ways Gator coach Will Muschamp is running the Gators. I didn’t read the whole thing, but I assume this involves “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough” sing-a-longs in the locker room.

• Rivals profiles new Baylor DC Phil Bennett and previews Kansas State’s spring.

• Nebraska turned down the Big Ten Network‘s offer to broadcast their spring game for fear that somebody would study the tape. Hark!

• Michigan is installing a new ginormous video board in Michigan Stadium. It’s expected to work well for awhile but still need some rebuilding.

• Ole Miss‘s new black bear mascot met with children. They weren’t all thrilled.

• Oregon DE Terrell Turner is out for the spring with a leg injury. You may remember him from such video situations as “towering over Ty and laughing.”

• The Name of the Year bracket is finally up!!!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the new music video from The Lonely Island, containing language that’s nowhere near safe for your work.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=N24fVEJyQKM

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Travis Barker, alumnus of no college or university. With that said, he still has a hell of a tat hookup in Columbus.

*****

• As of now, Ohio State coach Jim Tressel has been suspended two games (Akron and Toledo) and fined $250,000 by his bosses for knowingly playing ineligible players and not fully disclosing his knowledge of their memorabilia sales. The NCAA is yet to fully investigate this and arbitrarily reach a decision of their own.

Here is THE Ohio State documentation and submission to the NCAA. Included is the email proof of knowledge by Tressel.

ESPN’s Mark Schlabach had such high hopes for Tressel.

• UCLA DT Brandon Willis is transferring to North Carolina after committing to Tennessee, enrolling at North Carolina, then transferring to UCLA. We’re all excited to see him exhaust his eligibility without actually ever becoming eligible to play.

• The Huntsville, AL radio host who said he had tapes of Cecil Newton got canned for not actually having them. Oops.

• CBS Sports is priming for Washington State’s spring. Same goes for you, Missouri.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples looks at the questions that Virginia Tech and the ACC face in 2011. Some things you can’t unsee.

• Who are the ten best receivers in the SEC? ESPN’s Chris Low knows. EXCLUSIVE!!

• ESPN’s Heather Dinich went to a Miami practice and all I got were these bullet points.

• Some notes from Texas spring practice. Summary: Nobody knows much right now.

• Fox Sports Southwest examines the questions surrounding TCU’s spring and beyond. I’ll go out on a limb and say some Horned Frog will still wear smeared warpaint as eyeblack.

• An early look at the best non-conference games of 2011. And because it’s Fox, there’s a link in the middle to a site asking, “Are the girls of the SEC the hottest?” Not a joke.

• The Internet has demanded more Wyoming football players showing a camera around their homes and Wyoming football players have delivered.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Jackass for Girls.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgwTU9-a_3I

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Ty and Dan talk with Brian Murphy from The Idaho Statesman about Boise State’s “Cinderella” card, Chris Petersen’s dream job, the impact of facilities, and the 2011 season.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Miami resident Anna Kournikova, who I assume will never be the same now that Tate Forcier is headed to her adopted hometown.

*****

• Tate Forcier decided to take his talents to South Beach after he claims Michigan AD Dave Brandon wouldn’t meet with him (though Brandon tried to reschedule). Now Forcier needs to find a new head towel.

• Oklahoma State hired Jacksonville Jaguars QB coach Todd Monken to be their new OC, the job vacated by new West Virginia OC/HC-in-Waiting Dana Holgersen. So if you’ve been enjoying the David Gerrard magic in Jacksonville, things are only getting … similar in Stillwater.

• Utah OC Norm Chow will make less money in Salt Lake City than he did at UCLA. I think he’ll be ok.

• ESPN lists their top 25 recruiters. Not a surprise, but most of the coaches coach for teams who have had at least some success over the years. And Clemson.

SI (24/7 Sports) does something similar.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg speaks with colleague David Ubben about Nebraska moving to the B1G Ten.

• Ivan Maisel is buzzing now that it’s the offseason. It isn’t nearly as titillating as it sounds.

• Wisconsin agreed to a Rose Bowl rematch against TCU in its home opener. TCU said, “Not so much.”

• A few Virginia players look to be a fightin’ bunch.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a post-signing day podcast. He totally stole Andy Staples from us, a guy he never would’ve known if it weren’t for The Solid Verbal. Pshhh.

• Speaking of which, SI.com’s Andy Staples does his best Captain Hindsight, and re-ranks the 2008 recruiting classes.

• Backup Notre Dame QB Nate Montana appears to be considering Montana (birthrite!!!) as a potential transfer destination. So says The Missoulian, my current favorite Montana-based newspaper.

• Rivals has a list of 250 high school juniors who could, quite possibly, be very good.

• Rivals also has a preview of Conference USA’s spring. FINALLY.

(Other conferences are also apparently available)

• ASU QB Steven Threet continues to recover from concussions suffered in 2010 and is thus doubtful for spring practice.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a kitty jumping around in super slow-mo set to happy music.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=J1vpB6h3ek4

Enjoy your Thursday.

Ty and Dan are joined by Bryan Fischer from CBSSports.com to discuss all the latest recruiting news, National Signing Day, and how to balance bathroom breaks with prospect announcements.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Brittany Snow, who is on some new NBC legal show. She has no alma mater. Two strikes, but I’m not sure I care.

*****

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd profiles the nation’s richest non-bowl team.

• Ohio State coach Jim Tressel has cred coming out of his vest, yo.

• Everything you ever wanted to know about USC’s NCAA appeal.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers make up to-do lists for their respective conferences. Job #1 for the SEC? Finally stop being so bashful about showing conference pride.

• A Texas appeals court threw out Mike Leach’s breach of contract lawsuit against Texas Tech.

• TCU safeties coach Chad Glasgow is Texas Tech’s new defensive coordinator.

• 2 Live Crew’s Uncle Luke is the new DC at Miami Northwestern High School. This can only end well.

• Arkansas is building new facilities to the tune of $35 million. Woooooooo Piggggggg Players Lounge.

• The Wiz (now in full color Comic Sans!) has conference bowl records against the spread and straight up. Did I mention the Comic Sans?

• With National Signing Day around the corner, Scout has its final “Scout 300″ and Rivals its “Rivals 100.” Just know that by clicking around, you’re only further hurting the feelings of every poor kid that tried to block Jadeveon Clowney.

• Georgia received two blue chip commitments yesterday. They both seemed excited about the prospect of playing for a team with a disappointing ceiling.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features two cellists hammering out “Smooth Criminal.” Culture!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlVbEclPj4c

Enjoy your Friday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Pawnee, Indiana’s Ron Swanson. Back tonight! Which reminds me, I need breakfast.

*****

• Michigan QB Tate Forcier announced his transfer via Twitter, 140 characters at a time. And the release still isn’t nearly as entertaining as his brother’s transfer from UCLA. FACT.

• Wisconsin may lose their offensive coordinator Paul Chryst to Jim Harbaugh and the 49ers. This is now slow inching towards giant white offensive lineman porn.

• This year’s TCU-Boise State game may get moved from Fort Worth to Boise. Just because screw you TCU, that’s why.

• Yahoo!!!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart confirmed that former Louisville coach Steve Kragthorpe will take over as LSU’s offensive coordinator.

• A Mississippi State cheerleader appeared in Playboy and has now spoken about it with SB Nation. It’s all very exciting.

• QB Zach Mettenberger went to Georgia. Then he transferred. Now he’s going to LSU. And he looks like this.

• It’s the offseason, a perfect time for a refresher on EDSBS‘s Fulmer Cup rules and regulations.

• Texas Tech needed to drop one non-conference game to make room for a ninth Big 12 game, and, I hope you’re sitting down for this, they dropped a road game at TCU.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel spoke with Mike Leach and explains why Leach’s baggage (as long as it exists) will stand in the way of future employment.

• The Oregon cheerleaders shot a calendar. The Wiz has video.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Aziz Ansari’s version of the Parks and Recreation intro. I like this show.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by January Jones and the Golden Globes. And her appearance at some awards show last night.

*****

• LSU coach Les Miles turned downed Michigan for the second time and leveraged the interest to no raise and a smaller buyout. I stopped trying to understand all things LSU a long time ago.

• Former Iowa RB Adam Robinson apologized for his marijuana possession charges and wants back on the team. If all works out, I have the PERFECT house for him to rent.

• TCU OC Justin Puente is going to interview to fill the same position at LSU.

• … and so will former Louisville and Tulsa coach Steve Kragthorpe.

• Florida hired former 49er great Bryant Young to be a co-defensive line coach. He has almost no coaching experience, which almost always means coach Will Muschamp thinks he can recruit recruit recruit recruit recruit recruit recruit.

• Houston QB Case Keenum was granted a 13th year of eligibility.

• Tulsa named assistant Bill Blankenship their new head coach. Ok then.

• Tennessee RB David Oku is transferring. Ugh, an overrated 5-star RB leaving Tennessee after underachieving is sooooooooo 2010.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall laments Auburn’s post-Newton situation and ends up talking about chest hair.

• Georgia DE/OLB Justin Houston is skipping his senior year to play in the NFL. This comes after a number of Georgia players skipped various years in 2010.

• Is it too early to look at mock drafts? Probably, but here’s one from The Football Expert (aka the site of East Bay Greg, aka The Crown Prince of Backhanded Compliments).

• Auburn fans took pictures at Wal-Mart with stacks and stacks of Dr. Pepper cases. Oh, and what is probably a replica of the BCS national championship trophy. This makes me feel a little better, actually.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Ricky Gervais’s monologue from last night’s Golden Globes. It was so good, he’s already been asked not to return next year.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=BvHXzP2SpLA

Enjoy your Monday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you, in honor of today’s Independence Bowl by “Broken Arrow,” the greatest of all the Air Force movies that happen to star John Travolta and Christian Slater of all time. Or the worst.

*****

• Last night, FIU beat Toledo 34-32 in the Little Caesars Pizza Bowl. The game involved a hook-and-ladder to save 4th and 17, a RB named “Adonis,” and enthusiasm from the broadcast team that can only be defined as “slightly above-average.”

FIU coach Mario Cristobol was pleased.

• Hawaii got killed by Tulsa Friday night in the Hawaii Bowl. Turnovers were prominently involved.

• Georgia coach Mark Richt suspended three players for the Liberty Bowl — RB Caleb King and two backups — for academic issues. Somehow, some way, the Liberty Bowl MUST GO ON.

• Georgia Tech plays Air Force in the Independence Bowl later today. They themselves will also be without three players for the first half (curfew infraction) and four others because of academic issues. Apparently in the state of Georgia, being academically ineligible for lower-level bowl games is the new black.

• ESPN also has keys and previews for tonight’s Independence Bowl. It’s all very exciting.

• Texas Tech DC James Willis may or may not be the new DC at Florida. But he probably is. I think. Ok, I have no idea.

• TCU and Wisconsin went to Disneyland. No report yet on which players got pineapple whips, the single best dessert to be had at The Happiest Place on Earth.

• A post Splash Mountain reaction from Wisconsin QB Scott Tolzien and TCU QB Andy Dalton. (via Dr. Sat)

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday ranks the best plays of the 2010 season. A good list, but a little too UCLA-heavy for my tastes.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a nice collection of people getting injured due to snow and similar inclimate weather. Hilarity ensues.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAYexv4lnaY

Enjoy your Monday + Independence Bowl!

Ty and Dan talk about Cam Newton’s miserable Heisman speech and the Big Ten’s laughable press conference before bringing Andy Staples back to discuss all the coaching moves in the world of college football.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly, who I saw on a Texas sideline once (but didn’t take this picture). Mack Brown has since blamed them for this season’s slide.

*****

• Since we last spoke, everybody has hired a new coach (image via). Ahem:

Florida convinced Texas DC Will Muschamp (and his wristband) to leave the Austin Tire Fire for the Gainesville Tire Fire. EDSBS’s Spencer Hall reacts and makes it about blowfish sushi. Of course he does.

Miami hired Solid Verbal Guest (and Temple coach) Al Golden. He once hosted a training video.

Northern Illinois hired Wisconsin DC Dave Doeren.

Vanderbilt seemed to have hired Auburn OC Gus Malzahn, but he’s apparently not in any sort of need of $3 million. Or something.

• Arkansas essentially re-hired coach Bobby Petrino and made it so only Qatar State can buy him out.

• Auburn QB Cam Newton deservedly won the Heisman Trophy and is a consensus All-American.

Butttttt, the Football Writers Association of America did an independent investigation, proved and confirmed that Newton knew about his father’s solicitation the entire time, and subsequently left him off their Harumph Harumph Almost All-American team. I just can’t find a link of their findings yet. Rest assured, though, I will!!!!!

• Despite what he insisted, Urban Meyer may not be the picture of good health.

• I don’t know if I’m pumped or bummed out by this screengrab of Cam Newton and LaMichael James. James is also not impressed by flying Dumbos.

• Hawaii is officially a Mountain West team. So there’s that.

• The Big Ten, in unveiling its new logo and division names, revealed themselves to be exactly what we mostly thought they were — uh, dorks.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde says Texas coach Mack Brown has an uphill battle this offseason, as he needs to hire two new coordinators. Part of the application has leaked and obviously, if you want one of those jobs, certainly check the box next to, “Comfortable under bus?”

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno can’t hear you. But he can run the day-to-day of and make important decisions instantly for a gigantic football program. Yep.

• Navy beat Army again. You’re probably pumped if you own a peacoat.

• Nike will unveil new bowl uniforms for TCU, Boise State, Florida, and, if you can believe it, Oregon.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is of lightning bolts.

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan review a handful of conference championship games and dissect a bunch of projected bowl pairings.

Ty and Dan take a look at the NCAA’s ruling on Cam Newton, TCU’s move to the Big East, E. Gordon Gee’s stupid comments, and the Miami coaching vacancy.  Plus, Verballer voice messages, e-mails and locks of the week.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Vanilla Ice. I have no idea if he’s a fan of Miami football and/or Randy Shannon, but I can no longer hear anyone say “A1A” without yelling out, “Beachfront Avenue!!!” so I’m sliding him in today.

*****

• TCU is joining the Big East and it will join in all sports (after the 2011-12 academic year). It’s about time -- Coach Gary Patterson can finally tell Texas kids they’ll get to play on Thursday nights in Piscataway, NJ. Where do I sign?

• Miami fired coach Randy Shannon and won’t hire Jon Gruden. Unless they will, which they almost certainly will not.

• Michigan AD Dave Brandon is yet to evaluate coach Rich Rodriguez’s performance, but will do so in about a month. Most important Insight Bowl ever?

• The newest BCS standings are out. Northern Illinois is ranked higher than Florida, Texas, USC, and Georgia.

• Florida DL coach and former Iowa State head coach Dan McCarney is the new head coach at North Texas. Always happy for a “Dan” getting hired.

• You know how Ty and have said that Nebraska‘s fanbase was probably the nicest, most respectful fan base in college football? Well, they’re no longer making the rest of us look bad anymore — I present to you … Nebraska psychopaths!!

• The American Football Coaches Association has an All-American team. I bet they also have delicious pot lucks, go-kart races, and crazy slumber parties with scary stories. Or I’m just imagining that. But yeah right, it’s pretty much true.

• Cal DL coach Tosh Lupoi was suspended for instructing a player to fake an injury against Oregon. Because position coaches going rogue and instituting an individual position game plan without consulting anyone else sounds complete plausible. Mr. Lupoi, here comes the bus, we’re just going to give you a light shove and be on our way.

• Indiana coach Bill Lynch was fired and is now just plain ol’ citizen Bill Lynch.

• Vanderbilt coach Robbie Caldwell will step aside now that his interim year has concluded. That sound you’re hearing is some very excited (or terrified) turkeys.

• Florida coach Urban Meyer will fix the Gators by recruiting “tough” players. He then added, “What? Coach Addazio has a lot of heavy furniture that’s not just going to move itself out of the building.”

• USC coach Lane Kiffin explains how USC did what Tulsa couldn’t — lose to Notre Dame.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have some especially powerful power rankings and particularly project-y bowl projections. Whatever, you try thinking of two different adjectives to use in a sentence.

• Oklahoma State CB Brodrick Brown played a little game against Oklahoma called “just the tip.” Oh wait, I see what I did there.

• Florida DB Dee Finley has some constructive criticism for Gator fans. And by “constructive,” I mean “thoroughly misspelled demands of mass suicide.”

• Oregon State DT Stephen Paea has power running through his veins. Oh and lots and lots of cortisone.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel looks at new money in his newest College Football Overtime. ***Spoiler*** Texas is old money.

• The Wiz has the snapshots of the week. A disappointed fan in full-costume is featured, which is obviously the best kind of disappointed fan.

• An Auburn fan, celebrating the Tigers’ Iron Bowl win, tackled a snowman, and then did a dainty little celebration. I’m as surprised as you are. (via edsbs)

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is, well, I really have no idea what is or what happens, but it’s right below this sentence.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fC60iSTUmRE

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan break down a wild weekend that saw a monster upset by Nevada, a triumphant victory for Auburn, and a defining loss for Rich Rodriguez against Ohio State.  Plus, wackiness in the Big 12, closure in the ACC, and a host of listener Reverbs.

Ty and Dan deliver a super-sized episode, chock full of analysis for all the week’s biggest rivalries, listener e-mails and voice messages.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Billings, MT Mayor Tom Hanel. I needlessly insulted his fine town (below) and am thus making it up to him and his town here. Tom is the one with the mustache.

*****

• Ohio State president E. Gordon Gee doesn’t like Boise State or TCU and doesn’t think there should ever be a system to put them on equal footing, mostly because he thinks their schedules are undeserving. And as SI.com’s Andy Staples notes, Ohio State should be congratulated on their 59th ranked schedule, a whopping NINE spots ahead of Boise’s 68th.

• Former Ohio State LB Chris Spielman is shocked at how bad Michigan’s defense truly is, but likes QB Denard Robinson a lot. I think the combination of these two thoughts works out to a compliment.

• Colorado apparently thinks LSU Coach Les Miles is worth pursuing. Kind of sad when the fake long-shot rumor you’re floating to make yourself sound important involves Les Miles. I take that back — there’s nothing “kind of” about it.

• Nebraska DC Carl Pelini is sorry now, too.

• Who argues and makes a bigger spectacle of himself — Bob or Mike Stoops? The Wall Street Journal took the time to find out. It’s pretty close, but Mike’s facial-redness factor has really taken him to new heights.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers tell us what to watch and make some predictions. Here’s a guarantee: I predict there will be massive intestinally-driven DVR pausing across the country on Friday. Take that as you will.

• Here is this week’s regional ESPN/ABC map, so you can see what games are where. Residents of Billings, Montana — screwed again. The first time of course was simply having to be in BIllings, Montana. Actually, I take that back, it’s probably awesome in Montana. Now I feel bad. Here’s looking at you, Billings!

• GOOD NEWS: Eric LeGrand, the paralyzed Rutgers player, is breathing on his own and is not as paralyzed as he previously had been. Great things.

This news is essentially the opposite of any headline involving E. Gordon Gee.

• Clemson RB Andre Ellington is a game-time decision against South Carolina.

• Former Oregon coach and current ESPN broadcaster Mike Bellotti talks punt-blocking. PASSION!

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno will be back next year. Hey, Lavar Arrington isn’t going to coach himself.

• Georgia QB Aaron Murray says he’s pain-free (knee, sternum) and will be good to go against Georgia Tech Saturday night. The game plan remains unchanged — throw it up to #8.

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart interviews TCU coach Gary Patterson. Patterson gives his Fort Worth food and bar recommendations. Ok, he doesn’t, but we need them, Verballers. Where you at?

• Auburn DT Nick Fairley plays in a completely fair and just way. Just ask his teammates.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter, fresh off his 4th strike suspension, should be reinstated for the Notre Dame game. Whew.

• USC QB Matt Barkley hasn’t been practicing, but hopes to play against Notre Dame. He’s already started locking onto his receivers a few days ahead of kickoff, so things seem promising.

• The New York Times is all up in Cecil Newton’s church business grill.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is SNL’s Jay Pharoah (not Natalie Portman) on Letterman. I think I’ve already posted a video of him, but good impressions are really hard to do and he’s going STRONG with Eddie Murphy, Denzel Washington, Will Smith, and President Obama.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbQ4CoxiGrY

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Brooklyn Decker, the wife of Nebraska fan Andy Roddick. She probably doesn’t have an opinion of angry Pelinis or Texas A&M ball-grabbin’, but she’s, uh, sorry, I lost my train of thought.

*****

• Nebraska coach Bo Pelini was and probably still is steaming mad at everyone involved in Saturday’s loss at Texas A&M. And according to CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd, the guy who has a problem with everyone probably has some problems himself. I swear I came to this same life lesson while watching “The Hills” three years ago. Let’s continue.

• Despite rumors to the contrary, ESPN’s Joe Schad reports Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez is still a Cornhusker. Hard to tell if Bo Pelini is happy about this. And in other news, defensive coordinator Carl Pelini no likey shiny camera.

On top of all of that, their boss isn’t happy with either of them, and TE Ben Cotton got flagged for just wanting his balls back.

• Notre Dame LB Manti Te’o will play against USC this weekend with a busted honker. Until I see otherwise, I’ll just assume he got Marcia Brady’d.

• USC coach Lane Kiffin is “extremely hopeful” that QB Matt Barkley can play against Notre Dame with a high ankle sprain (X-rays showed no bone breaks). And just for kicks, Kiffin joked about how much of a disaster it would be to start some poor walk-on guy. HA, stupid walk-on, working hard and trying to earn a scholarship. LAME!!

• Former Oregon coach and current ESPN broadcaster Mike Bellotti withdrew his name from the Colorado coaching search. And in no way is it about the money or them looking in a different direction and him saving face. Couldn’t possibly be either of those two completely true reasons.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers issue some conference race updates, bowl projections, and power rankings. And then they break down last night’s AMAs. Not a surprise — Big East blogger Brian Bennett is NOT happy with Ke$ha.

• UCLA QB Richard Brehaut should be able to practice today after suffering from concussion-like symptoms during last Thursday’s Washington game. Because really, the right thing to do would be to rush a scrambled brain back to the field for your meaningless final games. Bra-Vo.

• In case you missed it, Illinois RB Mikel LeShoure went for 300 against Northwestern at Wrigley Field. And folks, Dan Persa doesn’t play defense.

• Stanford QB Andrew Luck wants no part of your tackling efforts. Muahahaha.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel peers over the TCU/Boise State fence in his newest College Football Overtime column and looks at the other teams that are in line to the ol’ BCS screwjob. Essentially it’s one long implied middle finger at the Big East.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter was ruled ineligible by USC after riding around in a golf cart with an agent that USC had already told not to give rides to players. And now, there definitely isn’t a group of pictures of other USC players at a party thrown by that agent. Definitely not.

• EDSBS’s Holly Anderson (Peete) gives out stickers because stickers are cool. Everyone knows that.

• Oregon State fans are camping out to buy Civil War tickets. It’s hard to tell how bothersome the 28,782 fans (that show up) really can get for a big game, but I’d guess if they filled the stadium to its 45,000+ capacity, it’ll at least be a touch inconvenient for a spell.

• Yahoo!!!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart gives out Week 12 awards. Right now, Dienhart gets my award for best Week 12 awards column. So meta.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a Thanksgiving alternative that absolutely nobody should ever try. Or everyone. I keep going back and forth.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIzzx2OolfI

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan talk about LSU’s close call, Nebraska’s dud, a potential Wisconsin-Stanford Rose Bowl, and the ongoing Dillon Baxter Experiment at USC.

Ty & Dan discuss the latest in the Cam Newton pay-for-play situation and the need to renovate Husky Stadium, and break down all the Week 12 action.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by James Lipton, host of Inside the Actor’s Studio. I couldn’t locate where/if he attended college, but I’ve actually become pretty excited about the upcoming appearance of Cal’s defensive line on his show. ACTING!!

*****

• Florida coach Urban Meyer expects Steve Addazio to remain in place as the Gators’ offensive coordinator next season. And yes, that’s good news for Gator fans who can’t stand to see supremely fast athletes getting the football in space. That would be the final frontier.

• Wisconsin coach Brett Bielema is going to keep on scoring and it’s pretty clear he doesn’t care what you or Dickie V think. Fine by me.

• Penn State RB Silas Redd was cited for disorderly conduct at 4:13 am, a fancy way of saying he was taking a leak in public. Since Ty blessed Redd as his favorite NIttany Lion RB this week, I think we can conclude that the Hildenbrandt Reverse Jinx is alive and well.

• SB*Nation’s Spencer Hall spoke with ESPN’s Rece Davis about Rece Davis-type topics.

• EDSBS’s Holly Anderson (Peete) gives out some rad stickers to college football names. Even Dan Hawkins (who was actually AT Saturday’s Colorado game) gets in on the action.

• Washington QB Jake Locker “expects” to play against UCLA Thursday night. Adjust your Thursday accordingly. And watch a new episode of The Office or something. Man, Archer needs to come back like yesterday.

• Boston College’s Luke Kuechly is an outstanding LB, but since he doesn’t play for TCU or Oregon or Auburn and he couldn’t personally jump somebody in the BCS rankings, he doesn’t matter. La-la-la I can’t heeeeaaaarrrr youuuuuu.

Ok, Yahoo!!!!!!!! also thinks he matters.

• Fanhouse’s Clay Travis thoroughly explains why Auburn QB Cam Newton will 100% be ineligible. Finally, SOMEBODY starts writing about the SEC.

• Staying on Clay, Wisconsin RB John Clay may sit this week (@ Michigan) after missing last week’s Indiana game. This changes nothing.

• Utah, once thought to be a legitimate top 10 team, embarrassed itself and hurt TCU with its loss to Notre Dame. That’s right, Mountain West Conference credibility has been hurt because of a loss to a depressing team like Notre Dame.

• A predominantly SEC-centric writer and a non-AQ writer predict bowl matchups. Penn State-Florida could theoretically happen, which would ultimately require a Spencer Hall/Ty Hildenbrandt live play predictor showdown.

• Cal defensive linemen are prone to spontaneous cramps. And below-average acting. Cal Football: We may not win, but we’ll go down acting like toddlers.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the definitive lesson on catching wild turtles in Kentucky. I defy you to do better.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gn8EQ0azXpQ

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Chris Farley (Marquette ’86), who is WAY funnier than Nick Fairley. He also wears little coats in a much more convincing fashion.

*****

• Auburn pulled away late from Georgia to remain undefeated. Both The Wiz and SportsbyBrooks have irrefutable video evidence that Auburn DT Nick Fairley would be satisfied if and only if Aaron Murray was unable to walk until scientific advancements allowed him to do so. Oh and his drive to injure only kicked in when Murray was far out of the play and defenseless.

• Georgia coach Mark Richt will not be the next Colorado coach. Or maybe he will, who knows.

• Three Southern Miss players were shot in a nightclub and subsequently hospitalized. They remain in fair condition.

• TCU offensive line coach Eddie Williamson suffered a heart attack in the first quarter of Saturday’s game against San Diego State. Actually, while we’re at it, will somebody check on Prolate Spheroid Sam?

• Due to concerns over head injuries, Texas RB Tre’ Newton has decided to give up football. Probably the smartest move he’ll ever make. Godspeed.

• Boise State MLB Byron Hout is out for the remainder of the year after breaking a foot against Idaho.

• Illinois plays Northwestern at Wrigley Field this week. It’s a game the BCS would rather you not care about, as it’ll be interesting to watch just because it’ll be interesting to watch. Here’s what one of the end zones looks like. Deliberate human injury seems so likely that it’s already been nicknamed “The Nick Fairley Side.”

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have conference race updates. Not too interesting, but we’re throwing our support behind Syracuse in the Big East. Not that we can actually see the games, but we’re all in on Doug Marrone. So in the spirit of Ty’s recent reverse jinx success … Go Pitt!

Oh, and there’s also power rankings, which aren’t nearly as cool as our soon-to-be-created Thunderskull Rankings. Which would you rather read? Exactly.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a new College Football Overtime. You probably thought you were just getting Regulation Mandel, and then, WHAM, overtime!!

• The AP’s Ralph Russo is exhausted by the BCS. Perhaps the column of the weekend.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a collection of inspirational speeches from movies. It’s only two minutes long, but whoever’s in the next cubicle over is DONE.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6wRkzCW5qI

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan go through all the Week 11 action and break down Oregon’s close win on the road against Cal.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Clay Davis, fictional corrupt state senator. He shares a name with Wisconsin RB John Clay, who is not a fictional corrupt state senator, but merely a bruising back with knee issues. You’re welcome for the clarification.

*****

• Kenny Rogers, the alleged agent provocateur to the Newton family, was on the radio yesterday explaining how it all allegedly went down between Cecil Newton (father of Auburn QB Cam Newton) and Mississippi State. I like it when radio interviews are damning, but I really wish the hosts would talk old-fashioney more during these things. “Now see here, fella, I’m telling you the truth, I say!”

EDSBS has a simple map to help you understand the Cam Newton situation. If you read between the lines, even the Fig Newton family is implicated. Comedy!!

• UConn beat Pitt last night. If you think there’s any story here beyond UConn RB Jordan Todman piling up 222 yards, you’re pretty much lying.

Ok, this was also relevant (via 30fps)

• Florida State QB Christian Ponder is questionable for tomorrow’s game against Clemson due to an elbow injury.

• Tomorrow isn’t looking very likely for Wisconsin RB John Clay.

• Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor announced that he’ll be back for his senior year and, in addition, he won’t be playing basketball. On the contrary, I will be playing basketball. For my average rec-league team. Who’s the real man now? Exactly.

• Former UNC WR Hakeem Nicks, among others (including former Maryland TE Vernon Davis) are said to have provided improper benefits to student athletes. Vernon Davis may have given, wait for it, up to $20 to somebody. When it rains, it, uh, drizzles lightly.

• Florida will continue to play their three-headed QB monster tomorrow against South Carolina. Well, not monster, how about three-headed shady dude?

• A touted JUCO DL recruit de-committed from Missouri and will go to USC because he believes he can be good enough after a year to go to the NFL. Dude must be getting crazy good grades.

• Former Colorado coach Gary Barnett questions the Buffs’ commitment to excellence. Nobody, however, questions Barnett’s commitment to letting a program spiral completely out of control under his watch.

• WhatIfSports runs simulations on this weekend’s games.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel answers reader mail. And dismisses the haters. Honestly, it’s SportsWriting 101 — never step to Mandel. EVER.

• The broadcast assignments for the BCS games have been released. Man, I can wait for the Fiesta Bowl.

• CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd argues that, in college football, cheating works. I’m still trying to figure out if he’s breaking new ground here.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall explains the rise and success of TCU. I don’t know if it’s more or less credible due to Hall never mentioning that crotchety (and hilarious) golf writer Dan Jenkins is giant TCU fan.

• CNN has some sort of list of popular tailgating locations. It’s ok, I suppose, but couldn’t they have done this on a giant, unnecessary touch screen?

• Finally, a guy in Kentucky was forced to eat his own beard. Not “finally,” like I’ve been waiting for this, just that this is the last story I’m posting today. Ok, so maybe I’ve been waiting for this to happen.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is “My Name is Jonas” by Weezer (live at the Warped Tour). I don’t know why, but it just feels like the right day for a nerdy bowl cut.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0GpyONUAXg

Enjoy your Friday + College Football Saturday.

Ty and Dan analyze the latest on the Cam Newton situation in light of recent comments by purported associate Kenny Rogers.  Plus, e-mails, voice messages and Week 11 picks.

Ty and Dan talk with Jerry Palm from CollegeBCS.com and CBSSports.com about the latest round of BCS rankings, the chances of a non-AQ school making the title game, and the possibility of a one-loss team sneaking its way into the big game.  Plus, more Cam Newton news!

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by awful human being Ted Bundy, graduate of the University of Washington, a non-embarrassing academic institution.

*****
• CBS cameras caught LSU coach Les Miles eating grass during the Alabama game. Apparently it wasn’t the first time. This singular act is why college football is light years beyond the NFL.

• This week’s BCS Standings are out. You know they’re legit when an exceedingly average Kansas State team checks in at #24.

• The Denver Post is reporting that Dan Hawkins job at Colorado is safe “for now.” It should be noted that a hacker installed a macro in the computers at The Denver Post that changes the words “absolute dust” to “safe.” Just for giggles.

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno won his 400th game. Word from State College, PA was that the coach celebrated quietly with family and a printout of the names and positions of his current starters. He’ll have it memorized by bowl time, damnit.

• Washington Athletic Director Scott Woodward watched his school lose AGAIN to Oregon, but took the time to call the academics at Oregon an embarrassment. And now a brief non-sanctioned Oregon rebuttal.

1. Woodward probably poops his pants all the time. I don’t know if this is true or not, but my subpar Oregon education never came with a manual explaining whether or not it’s ethical to imply who is and is not a Mr. Poopypants.

2. Woodward is the athletic director at Washington and has nothing to do with how good or bad Washington’s academics is or is not. Your revenue sports are (at best) average, your football stadium is dumpy, and you send out Jake Locker postcards. Congratulations.

• There was an exciting end to a game between two anonymous unranked teams.

• The Pac Twen announced its 2011 schedule. And you thought the next 23 seconds of your life would be uneventful. Ha!

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel, in his weekly College Football Overtime column,  implies that the SEC would be better served just shutting down football as a conference sport. Or it’s the usual column reviewing the week in college football. I can never tell.

• CBS Sports’s Eric Sorensen grids it up, giving awards to teams, people, and abstract concepts. Everyone will treasure these forever.

• CBS Sports’s Dr. Jerry Palm says the TCU-Boise State battle is “far from done.” Seriously, it’s in the title, why would I make that up?

• EDSBS has power rankings that go on distracted tangents quicker than … ooh I could go for an English muffin. How good are those nooks and crannies?

• LSUFreek has Nick Saban peeing in a bathroom next to a tiger. You may think he’s just putting Saban’s head into a scene from “The Hangover,” but really that’s exactly what’s going on. Kudos, Mr. College Education.

• Another Florida freshman may be in the doghouse. This one is DT Dominique Easley. He’ll either be the best Florida DT ever or will be off the team by December. There’s no in-between.

• ESPN’s CFB Bloggers have conference race updates. We at The Solid Verbal vehemently disagree with the notion that Texas is last in the Big 12 South, as Texas is still very much Texas.

*Note to Ty, if I knew how to autotune, I would produce no less than 17 electronic dance hits with you saying, “Texas is still Texas.” And the chorus would include, “speaking of pedophiles.”

• The Wiz (aka The Kingmaker) has local and national Week 11 reactions and the week’s snapshots. Texas fans seem bummed. Mack Brown Karma is a BITCH.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is an outstanding trick play (via The Wiz).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UIdI8khMkw

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan discuss a crazy week of high-scoring action and a very important statement win by TCU.  Plus, Reverbs and poking more fun at Ty’s locks.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Willie Nelson, former Baylor student. Does anybody dislike Willie Nelson? He may secretly be one of the most universally-liked people in America. And now his college football team is playing well. Actually, I don’t know if he follows football, but I like to think he does. Because I just flat out like the guy.

*****

• CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd profiles Utah’s recent success. I got kind of sick of reading about all the “Solid Verbal Bump” stuff with Whittingham, but other than that, it’s a good read.

• MGoBlog’s Brian Cook (SVBFF) reacts to the news that Michigan may escape the NCAA’s wrath. The next step is now escaping the wrath of average Big 10 offensive lines. One step at a time.

• South Florida beat Rutgers last night. And now you know.

• This week’s Baylor/Oklahoma State tilt means something for the first time in a long time. “Honest, mister!” says ESPN’s David Ubben.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers tell you what to watch and make Saturday predictions. I’ll tell you what not to watch, predict something. and I’ll do it all in one sentence. SNL will be painfully unfunny.

• Miami RB Damien Berry won’t play against Maryland because he’s “banged up.” That sentence took longer than usual to type, as even my fingers have sense how boring the ACC has become.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans is just kickin’ it with Mike Leach in Key West. Seems fun and possibly a bit terrifying.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall (SVBFF) writes about TCU/Utah and the BCS.

• Alabama WR Julio Jones faces LSU CB Patrick Peterson on Saturday. And they’ll probably just neutralize each other during a 13-11 game. Yay.

• After missing a few weeks with a knee injury, Arizona QB Nick Foles will start for the Wildcats against Stanford on Saturday. His hair remains day to day.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Ellen DeGeneres scaring people. This falls under the never-not-funny-unless-it-happens-to-you category. We need to get Ty famous and on Ellen’s show.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Filipino boxer Manny Pacquio, who fights Antonio Margarito this Saturday night. He’s also a former student at Notre Dame of Dadiangas (General Santos City), and readily admits that this may be the all-time low point for Brian Kelly and the program. Also, if you cheat and look down at the Video of the Day and compare the two items to yesterday’s Chorus sponsor, you’ll notice SYNERGY.

*****

• Florida coach Urban Meyer dismissed a notable true freshman safety. Doorknob. Damn, too late.

• CBS Sports’s Tony Barnhart dissects the intricacies of the schedules, philosophies, and status of Boise State, TCU, and Utah. Or it’s just more SEC rhetoric. One of the two.

• EDSBS’s Spencer Hall reviews some of the nation’s defenses, and does so with pictures of Howard Schnellenberger and a Dunlop tire. Just because.

• A mutual strength of TCU and Utah, the two Mountain West powers playing each other Saturday, is special teams. Especially since Utah fired noted special teams coach Muffy Muffington.

• Washington QB Jake Locker has a broken rib and will not suit up against Oregon on Saturday.

ESPN’s Ted Miller looks at the rest of the Pac-10 QBs and then points out that Washington is in a “tough spot” without their own starter. It should be noted that Mr. Miller graduated Summa Cum Laude from Obvious State.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers rewind and fast forward. And then hit the On-Demand button for some private time.

• Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez has a sprained ankle — not a bone bruise as was earlier thought. You can sprain his ankle, but you can’t sprain his freeeeeeedommmmmm!!!! Sorry, it’s early.

• An Auburn fan who definitely does not look like a kidnapper covers Paul Simon, but with Cam Newton lyrics. Yep.

• The Georgia coaching staff stays classy. Reggie Miller is cool with this.

• Arkansas WR Greg Childs is done for the year after suffering a patella tendon injury.

• The ad wizards at ESPN, Holly Anderson (Peete) at SB Nation, and SI.com’s Cory McCartney do some Heismaning.

• Vanderbilt RB Warren Norman (and valued double first-namer) is out of the year after dislocating his wrist.

• If Nebraska safety Courtney Osborne wanted to offer Missouri QB Blaine Gabbert a congratulatory head-butt, he did it the wrong way. Missouri coach Gary Pinkel is a bit perturbed.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde continues to analyze teams and matchups by feel instead of research. He’s like an old, weathered sea captain who’s average at being a sea captain.

• Tennessee QB Tyler Bray is now starting for the Vols. It’s worth noting that the top of his back looks like a dressing room entrance. File that.

• Yahoo!!!!!! ranks top 25 players by position.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Land of the Lost’s Will Ferrell singing John Lennon’s “Imagine” with Manny Pacquiao on Jimmy Kimmel Live. Nothing more to add.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=jT4hHMIpnjU

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan get together on Halloween and recap the Week 9 action, including solid road wins by Oregon and Auburn and tough road losses for Michigan State and Missouri.

Ty and Dan talk about Mizzou’s big win, the rise of Auburn, and Navy’s dismantling of Notre Dame. Plus, Verballers ReVerbs.

Ty and Dan make their picks for Week 8 and discuss the Pac-12 division decision, the new Rose Bowl sponsor, and the notion of taking an automatic weapon into a crowded stadium (instead of buying a ticket).  Plus, Verballer e-mails.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by UCLA alum and Academy Award winning composer John Williams. It truly does speak to the man’s talent how much better UCLA game film appears to be when the Indiana Jones theme is played simultaneously.

*****

• UCLA plays Oregon tonight. Bruin fans are pretty confident. In Oregon’s abilities to destroy them without mercy.

Duck fans are happy to stomp some weasel, because, you see, we’ve altered Rick Neuheisel’s name to read “Neu-weasel” because of his weasel-y tactics while at Colorado and Washington. They don’t call Eugene, OR the birthplace of modern comedy … at all.

• TCU coach Gary Patterson, on the sideline of the SMU game last month, went after the team doctor who told him that star RB Ed Wesley had a concussion. The word “hero” is thrown around too much these days, but this story really makes you sit back and realize that the first part of this sentence has nothing to do with anything.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel answers college football mail. I wonder if he has a name for his readers/fans like we do with “verballers.” I suppose I could just ask him myself, but I’d rather just pontificate here. The obvious choice is, of course, calling them “fandels,” but I’ll let the process work itself out organically.

• Heralded (get it?) Miami freshman safety Latwan Anderson left the football team to concentrate on track and field, his actual scholarship sport. He appears to be done with football, and to be fair, it can’t be a coincidence that this is happening just as the House of Run podcast is blowing up.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers make their predictions for the weekend and focus in on what to watch. And then, they teach you how to get some killer splash action.

• Illinois DT Corey Liuget (pronounced LEGIT) was homesick. So Liuget told his mom, “I think I’m going to come ba-” and his mom was all like, “uh uh” and he was all like, “but…” and then she was all like, “uh uh.” And now he’s breaking people into multiple parts if they happen to linger in the offensive backfield. Legit.

• UConn QB Cody Endres has been suspended for the remainder of the season for an “undisclosed violation of school policy.” Just the price you pay when you steal the mascot from those jerks at Valley High.

Ittttt’s alllllright, cuz I’m Saved by the Bell! (piano)

• The Big 10 crown will be decided on the field in in Iowa City. Where the grass is green and the girls are … eh, not bad.

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) runs down the goings-on in the world of non-AQ-ville. Because somebody has to.

• Texas A&M University President Dr. R. Bowen Loftin, well, just taught you how to Dougie.

• Syracuse fans raised enough money (with some left over) to bring 32 kids from the local Boys and Girls club to an Orange game — complete with shirts, food, and other goodies. Very cool. Your move, every other team.

• The recruiting class of 2011 was cool… in like 2008. 24/7 Sports (247 Sports?) has released their list of the Top 247 members of the class of 2012.

• Florida WR Chris Rainey may play next weekend when the Gators take on Georgia in “The World’s Largest Outdoor Formerly Meaningful Game.”

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is of Legos in cool places. Because Legos are pretty awesome. Duh.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Ty and Dan do their first show since meeting face-to-face in Lincoln, Nebraska and rehash VerbaCon 2010 as well as the other action during Week 7.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by proud Minnesota resident, Prince. There’s no indication that he pays any attention to the Golden Gophers and their recent dismissal of Tim Brewster, but perhaps the Gophers can turn their disappointing season around by purifying themselves in the waters of Lake Minnetonka.

*****

• Rutgers defensive tackle Eric LaGrand was paralyzed during the Scarlet Knights’ game against Rutgers. It’s an unimaginable horror, so if you’re so inclined, do send him your well wishes.

• Minnesota coach Tim Brewster was relieved of his duties (heh, duties) after the Gophers’ loss to Purdue. But not before receiving another extensions. Gopher up!

• Arkansas QB Ryan Mallett suffered a concussion during Saturday’s loss to Auburn. Even though his “symptoms are improving,” Arkansas fans are still using the Freedom of Information Act to get the doctor’s license plate number and Facebook password. Just because.

• BCS standings are out. Unless you host a terrible sports radio show and need to fill 4-5 hours, this probably doesn’t affect your life.

Ok, it affects Dr. Jerry Palm’s life and we like Dr. Jerry Palm.

• ABC’s Brent Musberger kinda/sorta mentioned Spencer Hall’s blog on the air. We of course would welcome “The Verbally Solid” casually referenced at any point, but only on BYU-TV — wouldn’t want our site flooded or anything.

• A Texas fan documented his trip to Lincoln, NE for the Nebraska game, but only used MS Paint to do so. I love this so much.

Warning: There are cartoon penises.

Related: Taylor Martinez is still the starter at Nebraska, at least for this week.

• ESPN’s team of CFB bloggers take a look at the conference races and issue their weekly power rankings. Once done with those, the group stepped aside and let Big 12 specialist David Ubben take the stage and rock an acoustic Earth, Wind, and Fire cover. Groove it.

• ESPN has some bowl projections. Should both teams win enough, I’m excited to see how Alabama/TCU gets avoided.

• Cal fan and Counting Crows frontman Adam Duritz wasn’t too optimistic before Saturday’s USC game. See, you can never let white guy dreads fool you, some of those guys pay attention to, you know, stuff.

• The new UGa loves some giant bags of ice.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel chimes in with his College Football Overtime.

Solid Verbal Behind the Scenes: Stew was a welcome guest into the world of Saturday’s Verbacon celebration in Lincoln. He enthusiastically chatted up Husker fans with us, dropping some knowledge bombs, and withstood a personal space assault from large, well-meaning Husker fan who couldn’t recommend Armen Katayen’s book enough.

Here are some SI.com pictures of Saturday’s action.

• Kentucky Everything Randall Cobb isn’t a fan of the fans.

• A referee during the Florida/Mississippi State game ruled a field goal good and then didn’t. That about covers it.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a first person view of what it’s like to parachute into Michigan Stadium. This is probably cool if you enjoy heights. In my case, let’s just say my feet are sweatier than they were before I started watching this.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UnJX2FiW-ik

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan preview all the Week Seven action on the eve of their first ever meeting in Nebraska for Verbacon 2010.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Six action and break down the losses by Alabama, Arizona and Michigan as well as the wins by LSU, Auburn and Oregon.  Plus, another rousing rendition of Saturday ReVerbs.

Ty and Dan delve into a few voice messages and some e-mails, and discuss their picks for Week Six.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Five action and talk about another fabulous performance by Denard Robinson.

Ty and Dan plow through voice messages and emails before previewing the first slate of October games in the 2010 college football season.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ty Burrell of Modern Family (on tonight). Beyond Burrell being an Oregon native and Duck fan, his character even referenced the 1995 Rose Bowl beatdown at the hands of Penn State, where he attended grad school. Weird. Thanks Wikipedia!

*****

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) likes Terrelle Pryor to take home the Heisman. The Heisman Pundit does not.

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly received a six year extension, which pays him about $2.4 million a year through 2015. I was this close to linking a Dido song to best express how I felt upon hearing the news, but I held back. Or did I?

• Georgia WR AJ Green, who has been suspended for four games and will make his debut against Colorado this week, first became a person of interest  due to an inaccurate report from TMZ. Honestly, if you can’t trust the integrity of a bunch of dudes with no-lens hipster glasses wearing $93 used t-shirts saying things like, “We have Harrison Ford leaving Koi…”, who can you really turn to? (via Dr. Saturday)

• The Big East wants TCU. And TCU was all like, “Oh hey, that’s, wow, I mean thank you, but you know, I’ve got plans already. Dang.”

• Boise State RB DJ Harper is out for the year with a torn ACL. While they’ll tell you it happened during the Oregon State game, you can never rule out foul play from Boise State safety Jeron Johnson, who WILL NOT REST until he’s the only healthy player on the field. No ACL is safe!!!

• Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio will be back coaching the Spartans this Saturday -- but from the booth against Wisconsin. If Michigan State doesn’t pull away and end it early against the Badgers, thereby limiting any possible tension, it’s almost like they hate their own coach’s well-being. Think about it.

• Boise State has a dog that retrieves the tee after kickoffs. Everyone thinks it’s a pretty cute new little tradition. Everyone… BUT JERON JOHNSON!!

• The Wiz has videos of various CFB cheap shots. The rocky mountain region really seems to like unabashedly injuring people.

• North Carolina State is 4-0. Just thought we needed a reminder.

Today’s Video of the Day is a Durex commercial. Durex: The Official Prophylactic of Today’s College Football Links.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyahoTR1Otk

Enjoy your Wednesday. But not too much, horndogs.

Ty and Dan talk about a wild evening slate of Week 3 games and dissect all the other action from Saturday.

Ty and Dan announce the details of their affiliation with theScore Radio, channel 98 on Sirius radio, and delve into all the week’s action with Fanhouse’s Clay Travis.

Ty and Dan delve into the week’s headlines, voice messages, e-mails, and, at long last, previews for the first week of the 2010 college football season!

Ty and Dan put together a pair of interviews with SI.com’s Stewart Mandel and USCFootball.com’s Ryan Abraham. Plus, news about the new website, the pick’em pool, and of course the Solid Verbal t-shirt sale!

Ty and Dan mull over the Mountain West’s sudden expansion with Jeremy Mauss from MWCConnection.com and discuss BYU’s master plan, the conference’s chances of getting a BCS bid, and the potential apocalypse for the WAC.  Plus, voice messages, e-mails, and a brief note about the show’s two-year anniversary.

Ty and Dan dive into an overflowing inbox and discuss 7-on-7 football, why Mitch Mustain should transfer, and the approximate number of 15-year olds a grown man could simultaneously defeat before being overwhelmed and crushed.

Ty and Dan discuss the latest happenings at Michigan, the BCS love letter to Congress, fantasy recruiting infractions, and everything going on in the Verballersphere.

Ty and Dan talk with Utah coach Kyle Whittingham about the legitimacy of Mountain West Conference, the need for a playoff, the secret to postseason success, and his preferred musical genre.

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Ty and Dan take a closer look at the stories to watch this spring in the Big Ten.  Plus, a spirited round of messages, a hater, and sidebars about Kirk Herbstreit’s tan and Lane Kiffin’s shirt size.

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Ty and Dan ring in April by reviewing Urban Meyer’s hissy fit, remembering Dez Bryant’s forgetfulness and plowing through a jam-packed inbox.

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Ty and Dan briefly discuss Oregon’s last turmoil and Admiral Ackbar before delving into a wide array of listener voice messages and e-mails.

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Ty and Dan delve deep into the mailbag and discuss Boise State recruiting, NCAA 10, and more scuttlebutt about VerbaCon in Texas.

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Ty and Dan empty out the inbox after National Signing Day and discuss innovative camera ideas, the viability of Fort Worth as the Solid Verbal Host City in 2010, and ferocious live mascots.

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Ty and Dan discuss the the accusations flying around Jeremiah Masoli, live mascots, recruit announcements and the vaunted fourth major.

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Ty and Dan review the bowl action (and their lackluster picks) since their last podcast, read some listener messages, and wonder what’s going on with Boise State cheerleaders.

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Ty and Dan return from a brief respite to reflect upon the Mike Leach and Urban Meyer stories, as well as the bowl games that have already been played.  Plus, picks for the 18 games between now and next week’s podcast.

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Ty and Dan hand out the 2009 Verbie Awards.

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Ty and Dan welcome ESPN’s Bruce Feldman back to the program to discuss recruiting hostesses, Big Ten expansion and bad Pac-10 TV deals, and, later, unveil the first annual Verbie Award nominees.

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Ty and Dan recap the weekend’s action and comb through the controversy as yet another slate of BCS bowls is revealed. Plus, ranting voice messages, information about the Solid Verbal Bowl Contest and a special announcement for next week’s episode.

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Ty and Dan delve into the warped world of duck fat with Spencer Hall from EDSBS.com and discuss Saturday’s huge SEC championship game, the problem with NFL scouts and the coaching search at Notre Dame.  Plus, Week 14 picks, e-mails, and yes, Dan Rubenstein hecklers on Nebraska radio.

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Ty and Dan plow through a cornucopia of voicemails, e-mails, week 12 news and week 13 picks due to the Thanksgiving holiday and their live broadcast this Saturday at 3pm ET.  Tune in at SolidVerbal.com or Livestream.com/solidverbal.

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Ty and Dan dissect TCU’s big win from a number of angles, evaluate Cincinnati’s BCS ceiling, bow down to Toby Gerhart, and batten the hatches for another Notre Dame coaching search. Plus, commentary from Jerry Palm and East Bay Greg, as well as voice messages and results from pick ‘em and fantasy football.

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Ty and Dan consult Clay Travis on how best to rob patrons of a popular, well-lit, centrally-located gas station, how to fix college football officiating, and what to do about the cockamamie BCS.  Plus, voice messages, week 11 picks, and a very special e-mail.

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Ty and Dan lament the losses by Notre Dame and Oregon and reflect on the other events that rocked the BCS foundation during last weekend’s slate of games.

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Ty and Dan recap all the tricks and treats of Halloween’s football action, including the most recent Iowa scare, Oregon’s frighteningly-good offense, and Brandon Spikes’ attempt at goring out an opponents eyes.  Plus, voice messages and details on Ty’s costume and Dan’s injury.

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Ty and Dan kick it old school by flying solo with an extravaganza of voice messages, e-mails and week nine picks.  Plus, a quick game of “overrated/underrated”, more additions to pool of potential Solid Verbal host cities, and some secret news on the life and times of Dan Rubenstein.

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Ty and Dan talk with Jerry Palm from CollegeBCS.com about the first week of BCS rankings, the deficiencies of the system, the variables that make it tick, and the ultimate doomsday scenario.  Plus, your messages, another Solid Verbal Host City and week eight picks!

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Ty and Dan are joined by Josh McCuistion from SoonerScoop.com to discuss Sam Bradford’s visit to Dr. James Andrews, the reputation of the Big 12, and the possibility of non-BCS team playing for the BCS Championship.  Plus, voice messages, e-mails, and the beginning of the open competition for The Solid Verbal’s host city in 2010.

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Ty and Dan review the second week of the 2009 college football season despite Ty’s emphatic request to talk about anything OTHER than the Notre Dame – Michigan game.  Plus, taunting voice messages, a recap of the college fantasy league, and a quick rundown of the Solid Verbal pick’em pool.

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While Dan is off frolicking in the Canadian wilderness, Ty brings in a witty guest host to take his place and discuss Mitch Mustain’s third string status, Bryce Brown’s eligibility, possible (or make-believe) corruption in the Coaches’ Poll, and the logic behind growing a mustache. Plus, voice messages and e-mails from afar. (Episode 54)

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Throughout August, we will be counting down the top 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season. Today we strap on our spurs and travel to Forth Worth, TX to talk about a college that may or may not have actual horned frogs roaming the premises, but whose website definitely has a picture of a cheerleader that looks like the chick from The Bachelorette.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First Impressions

Oh, how quickly we forget TCU‘s 17-16 victory in the revered Poinsettia Bowl over Boise State last year — you know, the game that had an over/under line somewhere north of John Daly’s weight.  It’s not easy being a non-BCS team in today’s world, especially when you post an 11-2 season and end up playing in the FREAKING POINSETTIA BOWL.  Not cool.

The Horned Frogs will have their work cut out for them if they hope to match last season’s success.  Can TCU effectively replace the loss of 13 starters?  Even if it can, a road schedule featuring Virginia, Clemson and BYU will be extremely challenging.  That said, TCU’s defense has been absolutely stifling over the last decade; if the trend continues in 2009, there’s no reason to think that the Frogs can’t compete in a big way despite some question marks on the offensive and defensive lines.

Regardless of how TCU’s 2009 season ends, the Horned Frogs deserve an awful lot of respect for the way they have battled over the last decade.  They’re tough to root against.

Last Year

TCU’s only two losses came on the road at Oklahoma (35-10) and Utah (13-10).  That’s it.  Actually, if it weren’t for an improbable Utah drive in the waning minutes of last year’s game, the Horned Frogs would’ve been 12-1.  Otherwise, with the exception of a close win against Colorado State, TCU’s victory margin in every other game was no less than 23 points.

Technically, TCU fell short in its quest to join the ranks of other elite non-BCS teams; however, you could argue that they’re already there.

People

TCU loses 13 starters from 2008, so understandably, there are major questions about replacing significant losses, especially on both the offensive and defensive lines.  But there is much firepower returning.  Standout defensive end Jerry Hughes will be back wreaking havoc on opposing quarterbacks again, building on his NCAA-leading sack total.  Junior QB Andy Dalton will have reliable targets in Jimmy Young and Jeremy Kerley.  And, in a weird mix of USC football with Major League Baseball, TCU could have a full, five-man rotation at RB with Ryan Christian, Joseph Turner, Chris Smith, Jai Caveness, and Edward Wesley. Senior tackle Marshall Newhouse will be bashing heads up front.  Coach Gary Patterson will have his work cut out for him.

Conclusion

There aren’t more than two losses on TCU’s schedule in 2009, so, as a baseline, you should be thinking of a 10-2 season.  The only real question is whether Patterson can inject new blood into the lineup and get the same production as last season.  While this team has the talent to go 12-0, chances are on a road loss at Clemson or BYU.  In one man’s opinion, the Clemson game will be the Horned Frog’s only loss.

Prediction

11-1

Highlights Set To Unfortunate Music

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y8OuXa_xd0Y

--Ty

Throughout August, we will be counting down the top 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season.  Today, we delve into BYU, our second Utah team in as many days.  It’s apparently Utah Week here at the Solid Verbal.  Apologies to Discovery Channel for upstaging Shark Week.

First Impressions

It is apparent after looking at BYU‘s 2009 schedule that the Cougars athletic department picked this season as the year it could potentially make a BCS splash.  Despite a shaky Mountain West schedule, which, as usual, features only Utah and TCU, the Cougs scheduled a neutral site game with Oklahoma to open its season and then a home game against Florida State two weeks later.  As our friend Phil Steele says in his publication, a 12-0 season for BYU could put them in the hunt for a BCS Championship.  Probable?  No.  But possible?  Boom goes the dynamite.

Coach Bronco Mendenhall might have the best name in college football (not counting Shavodrick Beaver, of course) and absolutely has the right attitude to raise BYU’s profile in the college football world.  This man wants to win a BCS championship, and though talk is cheap, he’s saying all the right things.

Last Year

BYU started 2008 with a 6-0 record, and hopes were high among Cougar fans that a Mountain West title and possible BCS bowl were in the cards.  However, after only beating hapless Washington by a 28-27 score in week two, the writing was on the wall for a deflating loss, which eventually came against No. 24 TCU.  All told, the Cougs finished 10-2, but you could argue that the record was more an aberration thanks to a weak conference — BYU’s two losses came against the only two ranked teams it played all year (the aforementioned TCU and, later, Utah).  To close out the year, BYU lost to Arizona in the Las Vegas Bowl.  Though a 10-3 record is hardly embarrassing, the 2008 season was a failure due to sky-high expectations by BYU fans.

(Personal note: If you write anything remotely true but unflattering about BYU football, you will be inundated by e-mails.  I didn’t think it would happen, but it did.  BYU has a surprisingly loyal and outspoken fan base.)

People

Three words: Max Effin Hall.  Last year as a junior, Hall threw for over 3,900 yards and 35 touchdowns, adding to the reputation of BYU’s wide-open style of offense.  He’ll be throwing to several receivers who may or may not be returning from missions, as well as tight end Dennis Pitta, who logged a healthy 83 receptions and 1,083 yards in 2008.  He’ll be handing the ball off to Harvey Unga, an experienced back.  In short, his team will score points.  That’s not even a question.  On the defensive side of the ball, keep your ears open for DE Jan Jorgensen, the MWC’s all-time sacks leader and potential NFL draft pick.

This Year

Plain and simple, BYU will be tested early.  You have to give credit to the Cougs for scheduling tough non-conference opponents, and for taking a shot at jumping into the BCS discussion.  Max Hall seems poised for another monster year, and BYU‘s coach certainly has enough vim and vigor to convince this team that it can pull off a major upset.  Oklahoma is sure to be a tough opponent, but if this game should end up being a shootout, wouldn’t that play right into BYU‘s wheelhouse?  Just sayin’.

The more realistic expectation, of course, is for a Mountain West championship.  In order to do that, BYU needs to pound the creampuffs on its schedule and take down both TCU and Utah (like two of the last three years, as noted by a commenter).  This feels doable, but only if the Cougs can rebuild their offensive line and stop the pass… two essential elements in a pass-happy conference.

Conclusions

It’s tough to convince yourself that BYU is a legitimate contender that is capable of beating Oklahoma, Florida State and Utah in the same season.  Would love to see it, but recent history (read: last year) would indicate that it’s just not gonna happen against ranked opponents.  That said, Mendenhall has done a nice job recruiting fresh talent to Provo, and a Mountain West title would be a nice pick-me-up for a program with a dynamic coach at the helm.

Prediction

10-3

Highlights Set To Unfortunate Music

www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDXFaWmVChg

--Ty

Throughout August, we will be counting down the top 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season. Today we bring it on down to Utahville, where we’ll take a look at the only program to go undefeated twice in the BCS era. Another fun fact:, Utah is the only state in the union to have their nickname centered around the production and storage of honey. I love honey. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

First Impressions

A case could be made that this has been the Offseason of Utah. You could also consider Lane Kiffin and Tennessee, but it seems like the Utah football program is a central theme in every BCS story and more (or less) importantly, every congressional college football hearing thus far during the offseason. 

Larger stories aside, Utah has done quite well for itself. Its recruiting base isn’t big, but through innovative coaching and steady player development, the Utes have been able to couple quality 7-9 win seasons with special seasons in which they’ve punched some huge teams square in the mouth. 

Utah shares the same ol’ problem that most teams in western states face: exposure. You can only draw so many conclusions without actually seeing games, which obviously can work for or (generally) against non-BCS conference teams with BCS aspirations. 

As a west coast football fan, very few things have been more satisfying to watch than Utah dismantling a pouting Alabama team in the Sugar Bowl. Do you hear that ringing? John Parker Wilson still does. 

Last Year

Undefeated. Plain and simple, Utah was the most important team of the 2008 college football team. 

For you nitpickers, there were some weaker parts of the 2008 season that a supposed national title contender shouldn’t have on their resumés. Only beating a terrible Michigan team by two is defensible given it was the first game of the year and it was on the road. Winning by three over a 4-win New Mexico team that fired their coach after the season is far less than impressive. Oregon State couldn’t close out a game at Utah with under a minute left and Utah promptly took advantage. It’s what great teams do. 

2008 = The Year of the Ute. 

People

Wait, where did everybody go? The Utes lose starting QB Brian Johnson to graduation (amongst unconfirmed rumors of an AC/DC tour), the three starting receivers, star DE Paul Kruger early to the draft, two starters on the OL, a rotation RB, a defensive tackle, and both starting corners. Kruger’s supposed weakside replacement, blue chip JC transfer James Aiono, also won’t be making it to the SLC until next season. 

The strength of the team looks to be the returning linebackers, led by OLB Stevenson Sylvester (I checked, it’s not backwards). It’ll be a season of opponents both attacking what should be a more conservative offensive attack and throwing against an inexperienced Ute secondary. 

On the coaching front, they lose offensive coordinator Andy Ludwig, though some (ahem) may argue the validity of the term “loss” here. The good news is that the Utah head coach job appears to be a destination gig for Kyle Whittingham, which is always an advantage when your team is forced to swim against the current in a skewed system. 

This Year

They open with two wins against Utah State and San Jose State. SJSU has improved under Dick Tomey, but Utah should be able to get a win after USC toys with the Spartans the week before. As nice as it was to beat Oregon six years ago (and inspire the Ducks to move to the spread), Eugene doesn’t look to be pretty for a rebuilding team. 

Louisville is a winnable home game, Colorado State is a bowl team that could pose problems on the road. Frankly, a game at UNLV followed by three straight at home against Air Force, Wyoming, and New Mexico should all yield victories. 

The tail end of the schedule has the Utes on the road against TCU and BYU teams that can’t be terribly pleased about losing in Salt Lake City last year. There’s a small shot against TCU, but the Holy War at BYU won’t be pretty. 

Conclusion

The personnel losses are significant, but outside of three brutal road games at Oregon, TCU, and BYU, the Utes have a reasonable opportunity to minimize their fall from last season’s unprecedented grace. Breaking in new corners is never fun, but the passing in the Mountain West is essentially limited to Max Hall and BYU … though it is A LOT of passing. 

The Prediction

8-4

Highlights Set to Unfortunate Music

-Dan