Ty and Dan debate the true definition of “Clemsoning,” break down the laser arm of Andrew Luck, and discuss all the Week 9 action.

Ty and Dan rehash college football’s eighth week and discuss Kirk Cousins’ Hail Mary, James Franklin’s casual dress Saturday, Clemson’s chances of going unbeaten, and Nick Foles… in a winning effort!

Ty and Dan talk with Spencer Hall about Will Muschamp’s early marks, LSU-Alabama, the Big Ten, “We” Bombs, and a college football version of The Truman Show.  Plus, picks for all the big action during Week Eight.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Regis University attendee Bill Murray, because he’s Bill Murray and that’s good enough.

*****

• CBS’s Bruce Feldman checks in with his Monday “Big Picture” column. He has many (earned) kind words for Miami QB Jacory Harris.

• The first BCS Standings are here!!!

• ESPN‘s bloggers have power rankings and bowl projections and what they learned, oh my!

• ESPN’s Mark Schlabach has an early Wisconsin-Michigan State preview.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall has his Week 7 SitRep. Read it.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel doesn’t just do regulation. He does OVERTIME.

• The Wiz has weekly screengrabs, including one particularly hungry Cincy fan.

• Yahoo’s Dr. Saturday digs into the rankings and has weekly superlatives.

Today’s Video of the Day is a guy base jumping off an elevator in Spain. My palms aren’t doing so well just typing that.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RdA1nPINVZw

Enjoy your Monday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan break down all the action from “Tire Fire Saturday,” including Ohio State’s passing offense, a near “Clemsoning,” and more unfortunate uniform combinations. Plus, voice messages from rowdy listeners.

Ty and Dan welcome Bruce Feldman back to the show to discuss Clemson’s ceiling, the looming LSU-Alabama showdown, Urban Meyer-to-Penn State rumors, the misunderstood Mike Gundy, and a host of other hot topics in college football.  Plus, your e-mails and voice messages, and a Week 7 Preview.

Ty and Dan review an underwhelming slate of Week 6 action, discuss Urban Meyer rumors, rank the ACC, and analyze Texas A&M’s attempts to simultaneously win AND lose each football game.  Plus, your Reverbs and another round of “Nick Foles In A Losing Effort.”

Ty and Dan rifle through all the Week 5 action and examine their lingering trust issues with Ohio State, Clemson, and Texas.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Oregon attendee and Always Sunny in Philadelphia star Kaitlin Olson. Welcome back to teevee, horrible people.

*****

• LSU squashed Mississippi State under their thumb last night. Not pretty.

• Minnesota coach Jerry Kill is out of the hospital and ready for action (maybe).

• ESPN’s David Ubben talks Iowa State and upward trending.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett chats with Michigan State QB Kirk Cousins ahead of tomorrow’s Notre Dame game.

• Oklahoma‘s regents are meeting on Monday. This passes for news, apparently.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson previews tonight’s Boise State-Toledo matchup.

• Cal coach Jeff Tedford was reprimanded for speaking poorly of officials.

• SI.com’s Jordan Conn profiles FIU’s T.Y. Hilton. T.Y. Hildenbrandt is very excited.

• The Wiz has a prognostication wrap of writers from across the country.

• Maryland‘s down two receivers for the West Virginia game.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features The Dude and some sweet, sweet soul.

Enjoy your Friday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan roll through the news of the week, Verballer voice and e-mail messages, their picks for Week 3, and present the best Jesse Palmer impression of all-time, courtesy of West Coast Kevin.  Editor’s note: Look for a special Oklahoma-Florida State preview show tomorrow.

Ty and Dan talk with Stewart Mandel from SI.com about expectations for Ohio State, Wisconsin’s unfamiliar role as favorite, Penn State’s quarterback questions, the addition of Nebraska, and other Big Ten topics.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Michael McKean, the only Carnegie Mellon graduate to also be a member of Spinal Tap. Beat that.

*****

• Florida State coach Jimbo Fisher‘s son is battling a rare blood disorder. Strong wishes from the Click Chorus.

• Arizona State LB Vontaze Burfict blew up a teammate. Quick, everybody act surprised.

• Michigan WR Darryl Stonum has been forced to redshirt this year after a DUI plea. Ty thinks it’s laughable to compare the situation to Michael Floyd‘s, which is true, it appears Michigan may desire a higher standard under Brady Hoke. Apples and golden oranges.

• The Longhorn Network contract is analyzed by Outkick the Coverage’s Clay Travis. Allegedly.

• It’s QB John Brantley‘s turn in Florida. Again.

• Nebraska QB Bubba Starling, who definitely is playing baseball and not football, didn’t practice and isn’t on the roster. So other than that…

• ESPN is all-accessing Florida. Photographs!

• Fox Sports’s Andrew Astleford profiles Missouri QB James Franklin, who may do the unthinkable and finish in the top half of some Big 12 passing categories, eclipsing the immortal standard set my Blaine Gabbert.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly has been saving his West Virginia preview for a special occasion. Or today, either way.

• Boise State has gotten around the Mountain West‘s unfair blue-on-blue ban. Brilliant.

• Michigan St DT Jerel Worthy has immortalized his disdain for the Maize and Blue.

• Wrap up Pac-12 Week with Yahoo!!!!!!’s Dr Saturday.

• Virginia Tech gets the latest Rivals preview treatment. LUNCHPAILS!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the (DECIDEDLY NSFW) trailer for The Sitter.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYvj9J0GLsU

Enjoy your Monday. Clothing is purchasable.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Duke graduate Retta, who drives (easily) the best car on Parks and Recreation. We forgive her for her Blue Devil-dom.

*****

• No Big 12 proprietary networks can broadcast high school games for a year. Hear that, Cyclone Network? Exactly.

• South Carolina QB Stephen Garcia is officially back. No party is safe.

• It’s been too long without an EDSBS Fulmer Cupdate. Now it’s been like three seconds.

• The Big 12 has enough receivers to rank the best ten. Garrett Gilbert has some ‘splaining to do.

• Northwestern QB Dan Persa‘s Heisman campaign (including branded dumbbells!) starts now. Or when his shredded achilles fully heals, whichever comes first… and then it starts!!!!

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly has a Clemson preview. I had big expectations for this one after starting out strong, but it faded pretty quickly.

• Media members ate well at Big East media day. Whew.

• SI.com’s Cory McCartney profiles Louisville RB Victor Anderson, he of “What ever happened to Victor Anderson” fame.

• The most uncomfortable media day hundred seconds of your day now exist. I got through about 31 seconds.

• Yahoo!!!!!’s Dr Saturday has begun Pac-12 week in the Grand Canyon State.

• Maryland‘s going to have new uniforms. Calling it now — camo turtle print.

• Smart Football has highlights, clips, and insights from Mike Leach’s “Swing your Sword.”

• Rivals ranks backfields. The top two are way out west where they don’t even know how to play REAL football.

• Rivals has a Michigan State preview, which features the dreamy Kirk Cousins. (SNAP OUT OF IT RUBENSTEIN)

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is your introduction to Chief Shark Officer Andy Samberg. Backflip!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8zdCHp8P9Q

Enjoy your Tuesday. Commerce!

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Brooklyn Decker, anonymous North Carolina fan and actress(ish) in a new movie called Battleship. Based on Battleship the board game. I blame everyone but her for how horrible it’ll be.

*****

• Butch Davis is out at North Carolina. Not totally unexpected, but the timing is such that UNC must REALLY not want anything to do with him. Interesting.

SI.com’s Andy Staples has questions. Such a sleuth.

Was it the whole cheating thing? Maybe?

ESPN’s Heather Dinich reviews possible UNC interim candidates.

• Gunner Kiel, the nation’s unanimous #1 HS QB prospect chose … Indiana. How many times do you think IU coach Kevin Wilson used the word “Bradford” during conversations? 71,000? 73,000?

• The Pac-12 Network was expected. We got Pac-12 NetworkS. In a year, you won’t be able to avoid Jeff Tedford‘s face. So, yeah.

• Oklahoma State has new uniforms. The gray lids have a fan in me.

• When Oregon WR coach Scott Frost leaves Eugene for Nebraska (or whoever gives him an OC job), they’ll be worse off.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller has Pac-12 media day notes. I learned that Washington‘s large people are dented.

• ESPN’s David Ubben does the same with the Big 12. Iowa State appears to be tapping the breaks on the whole “tough non-conference schedule” thing.

• ESPN’s Edward Aschoff profiles Vanderbilt QB Larry Smith, currently Nashville’s most sacked college QB!

• The new voice of FIU football is … former CNN anchor Rick Sanchez? Okeedoke.

• Clay Travis says air conditioning is responsible for Florida sports dominance. Not to be outdone, it’s also responsible for some of my most dominant naps.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews Missouri. Don’t tell anyone, but they’re defense has gotten, at times, scary good.

• Thought you knew the rules? Good, now forget everything — SI.com’s Andy Staples has you covered.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel mailbags it and suggests that Washington could be better sans Jake Locker, something I’ve been saying for at least 10-15 minutes.

• Yahoo!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday goes green and previews Michigan State. Because they wear green. Brilliant.

• They’re also seeing red as they preview Nebraska. God, I’m so on today.

• Georgia LB (and USC transfer) Jarvis Jones will miss the 2011 season with a shoulder injury.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the next sports to take the world by storm — I call it kicky jumpy mini-volleyball, or KJMV. Sign up now!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ljb6Mne8Mfc

Enjoy your Thursday. Thread up.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Kentucky alum and superfan, Ashley Judd, who is probably paying part of John Calipari’s eventually-vacated contract extension.

*****

• Two Georgia players are now on the (in)eligibility radar. I pasted that from an earlier item.

• In dealing with NCAA inquiries, Oregon has retained the services of a law firm and attorney that writers themselves call “The Cleaner.”

• UNC released the names of the players who accrued the hundreds of parking tickets. Former WR Greg Little “had 93 tickets on multiple vehicles with nine different license plates.” Prolific.

• USF OL Danous Estenor heroically picks up cars. No big deal.

• Former NC St QB Russell Wilson will announce his 2011 destination today. He will then appear on College Football Live. Adjust your schedule accordingly. Or don’t, whatever.

• ESPN’s Craig James appears to have become awfully political for an analyst not supposed to be publicly political.

• ESPN has Big East OL rankings, ACC OL rankings, and B1G OL rankings. Don’t blame me when conference OL rankings come up at a cocktail party and you have nothing to say.

• Something called “T-Woolf” will take the field for Michigan in a couple months. I warned you.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews Michigan State while also conceding that the Spartans didn’t deserve to beat Alabama in the Capital One Bowl. Whew.

• Vanderbilt has sneakily begun the recruiting season in strong fashion. Do yo’ thang, Coach Hand. Do yo’ thang.

• Former Alabama RB Corey Grant will transfer to Auburn to be in Gus Malzahn’s spread system. Apparently, he thinks Gus Malzahn will be in Auburn next fall. Cute.

• Florida DE Chris Martin will once again transfer. Frequent flyer miles up the wazoo.

• Pitt will take on its 48th B1G transfer, this time it’s Wisconsin RB Zach Brown.

• How Oklahoma State got $165 million from T. Boone Pickens. I imagine one of the ways was a promise of absolutely no swift boats.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the worst cat DJ ever. Pretty much a no-talent.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HA5WVjMBX8

Enjoy your Monday. Buy tees!

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by my friend Ana Ivanovic, who starts a magical Wimbledon run this week. Also of note, “friend” now means person I will never know and sometimes gawk at from afar.

*****

• Nevada WR Brandon Wimberly was shot in the abdomen, most likely ending his football career. Awful.

• Minnesota RB DeLeon Eskridge, the Gophers’ leading rusher last year, will transfer from the program to be closer to a family situation.

• Former Miami RB Storm Johnson will officially transfer to UCF, where he’ll continue his football career and then inevitably become a local weatherman.

• South Carolina S DeVonte Holloman was arrested for DUI Friday night. Only five more chances, DeVonte.

• The New York Post’s Phil Mushnick knows not of what he speaks, but we already knew that. CBS’s Adam Jacobi dances on Mushnick anyway and it’s golden.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers are profiling programs in urban locations. It’s a June thing, I suppose.

• ESPN’s David Ubben ranks Big 12 QBs. Somebody named Steele Jantz is competing for the Iowa State job, so I’m rooting for Steele Jantz.

• South Carolina DE Jadeveon Clowney is the eighth best DE in the SEC. That was quick.

• West Virginia coach Dana Holgorsen has a quick Q&A with ESPN. He had to make it quick to hurry to an appointment to be shot out of a novelty circus cannon.

• Football Study Hall has a number of creative backhanded compliments for UConn.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples profiles Texas’s offseason. Google Chrome didn’t find one mention of the word, “BBQ.” Total pro.

• Rivals ranks defensive combos. Stanford LB Chase Thomas made the list, despite faking an injury at one point. It doesn’t take much, Rivals, does it?

• The Situation is (probably) being paid to be a Michigan State fan at some point this fall.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Stephen Colbert commencement speaking.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6tiaooiIo0

Enjoy your Monday. Buy clothing.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by former Boy Meets World actress Danielle Fishel. She apparently hosted some show thereafter. The important thing to remember here is that we went to the same high school. And our high school is terrible at football.

*****

• Oregon All-American CB/PR Cliff Harris has been suspended indefinitely in the wake of his driving citation and other outstanding (in a bad way) fines. He’ll miss, at the very least, the LSU game. Say what you will, but Chip Kelly is now probably the Anti-Tressel of the moment.

• ESPN’s Chris Low ranks SEC wide receivers. An innocent enough list until you realize who will be throwing to these guys. And that would be mostly unproven people.

• ESPN’s Heather Dinich gets in on the position ranking hustle and trots out ACC quarterback rankings. Randy Edsall is in charge of #1. I don’t feel good about this.

• Add “saggy pants” to the list of awesome things happening right now for New Mexico football.

• Kegs ‘n Eggs has Bodog Heisman odds. Notre Dame QB Dayne Crist checks in at NotGonnaHappen to 1.

• Football Study Hall does its best to figure out Cal. I don’t think they’ll ever be the same.

• Michigan St is ready to prove the doubters wrong. Unless the doubters live Tuscaloosa, AL. You guys were totally right.

• Pac-12 commissioner Larry Scott is, alongside his Big 10 and SEC brethren, also looking into athletes getting a little more scratch.

• The new Longhorn Network will mostly feature Mack Brown doing and saying things.

• Former Miami RB Storm Johnson can transfer anywhere he wants to, so long as it’s not a college or university in the United States.

• Two Kansas football players are taking on other KU athletes at their own sports. This time it’s women’s soccer. The video is a little long but if you start at around the five minute mark you won’t be sorry. Unless you hate comedy.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is terrific advice to graduates of any age — keep on dancing!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WCgKEukISs

Enjoy your Thursday. Buy stuff, etc.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ben Schwartz, Union College (Schenectady!) graduate. He was good doing shorts for ESPN and is now great occasionally on Parks and Rec. Also, his hair is eerily similar to mine.

*****

• Terrelle Pryor pulled a Jason Giambi and apologized for nothing in particular. Sports!

• CBS’s Brett McMurphy looks at how the tornadoes that hit Alabama brought a little bit of humanity to the Iron Bowl. Just a little.

• Pitt and Penn St will start playing each other again in five years. By that time, Ty and I will either be THE voices of college football or we’ll be long gone with the money we’ve slowly laundered from everyone that has ever listened to the show.

• Texas lost WR Greg Timmons to a nasty case of no longer wanting to play for Texas.

• Free agent QB Russell Wilson should be deciding on a 2011 destination soon. You know, for grad school.

• The CBS Sports Network, which will forever be a triple digit channel, has hired Rich Rodriguez to be a full time analyst.

• Football Study Hall aims at Ole Miss. And Dairy Queen. Just read it.

• ESPN’s Heather Dinich looks at Week 3 of the ACC slate. My calendar also says today is June 15, if you’re curious.

• SEC running backs are ranked. No joke to be had here, the conference is filthy is backs.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg chats with Michigan St coach Mark Dantonio.

• New West Virginia coach Dana Holgorsen went skydiving yesterday. And almost exploded.

• Oh, you thought The Wiz was done rolling out the financial reports from the bowl games. Too silly.

• Rivals’s's’s's’s Tom Dienhart looks at the biggest scheme changes of the offseason.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features two seals being released into the wild. And wouldn’t you know it, right after they were released, things got super romantic.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=dgJbqyQN164

Enjoy your Wednesday. Buy stuff!

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan take a look around the national college football scene with SI.com’s Stewart Mandel.  What will come of the federal inquiry into the BCS?  What happens to Jim Tressel in the wake of turmoil in Columbus?  Who is the better pick in the Mountain West, Boise State or TCU?  All that and much more, plus Verballer voice messages, and an awkward conversation about Michael Bay making, well, a different kind of movie.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by the excellent Aisha Tyler, Dartmouth graduate and Archer (season finale tonight) voicestress.

*****

• UMass is joining the MAC. Forget everything you know.

• CBS’s Tony Barnhart eulogizes the great career of legendary UNC broadcaster Woody Durham. No snark here — very little in sports is ever cooler than a old, trusted play by play guy.

• Harvey Updyke, the Alabama fan who poisoned the trees at Auburn‘s Toomer’s Corner, was attacked at a gas station after a court hearing. S-E-C! S-E-C!

• Virginia Tech is playing around with defensive line depth. DT Antoine Hopkins appears to be a name to remember, though unfortunately, it’ll probably get used with the word “lunch pail” and “blue collar.”

• The attorney general from the state of Utah is suing the BCS over the organization’s alleged status as an “illegal monopoly.” This will only end in almost nobody caring.

• Minnesota is all about tempo. Low and slow it is not.

• Northwestern and Stanford have agreed to a series of games. Most people are looking at this from a perspective of two esteemed academic institutions meeting, which is good enough for me.

• Michigan State‘s next step? Staying good every year, at least until being throttled by an SEC team on New Years.

• Speaking of which. Fox Sports Detroit profiles OL Arthur Ray, who, if there’s any justice in the world, should be flattening people come September.

• Oh and now you’re going to tell me cocaine trafficking should be off-limits for Duke linebackers?

• Touted high school QB Zeke Pike committed to Auburn. Zeke!

• Mississippi State coach Dan Mullen is doing a swell job in Starkville. This is all going to be quite uncomfortable when he leaves in the next two years.

• Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez has separated himself from the pack, at least for now. Sort of.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for “Terri” which looks good and makes me want to wear pajamas. Well, more.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=EpUzuZGiPho

Enjoy your Thursday.

Follow me on AdultFriendFinder.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Reese Witherspoon, one time Stanford student. Perhaps she was bummed that we had Jeff Tedford on and had a glorious time talking Cal football. It’s fine, Reese, we know where your heart really is.

*****

• Michigan State OT Arthur Ray is again practicing after the 2007 removal of a cancerous tumor from his leg. We wish him many healthy pancakes.

• CBS’s Bryan Fischer visits Fort Worth to break down TCU’s revamped roster. I really did think the use of “revamped” would sound better than it did.

Speaking of which, take a look at TCU’s Rose Bowl ring. It’s essentially a bejeweled golf ball.

• Do you have the CBS Sports Network (formerly CBS College Sports)? Do you like Mountain West games? Have I got news for you!

• Bruins Nation breaks down the Pac-12 TV contract possibilities. Every single time the word “Fox” appears in print when people discuss this story, it bums me out just a little bit.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller has notes on Stanford’s defense. I couldn’t find anything on LB Chase Thomas practicing the ol’ fake knee injury. Look harder, Miller. Look harder.

• Yahoo!!!!’s Dr. Saturday turns his QB focus to Darron Thomas, booger-pick and all.

• ESPN’s David Ubben predicts the Big 12′s 1000-yd rushers. A Bryce Brown sighting!

• ESPN’s Chris Low does the same for the SEC, but only lists Alabama RB Trent Richardson at #2. Do you not understand that he may in fact be better than Mark Ingram? Sheesh.

• Cal WR Tevin Carter left the Bears and returned home, the assumption being that Carter has no interest in continuing a football career elsewhere.

• Clemson coach Dabo Swinney talks spring football. And classic American hairstyles.

• Mr SEC has the details of alleged payments and inappropriate contact between an Alabama booster and LB signee Brent Calloway. Fun.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the fake Windows 7 commercial with a storm trooper.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=zr04FBKPS9E

Enjoy your Friday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Ty and Dan talk with Adam Jacobi about Iowa’s path forward, Ohio State’s turmoil and Words With Friends.  Plus, a very special presentation from Tim Hyland of About.com.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Georgia alum Kyle Chandler. He was Coach Taylor on Friday Night Lights and stars in JJ Abrams’s “Super 8.” Clear eyes, etc.

*****

—> JOIN THE SOLID VERBAL NCAA POOL <—

• Four Auburn football players were arrested and charged with robbery. Excuse me, four FORMER Auburn players were arrested and charged with robbery. Fulmer Cup implications are here.

• It just would be the offseason without the annual Michigan State arrests — this time, though, the Spartan players tried something new and were arrested for assault and eluding police IN ASPEN. Gentlemen Spartans!

• Georgia coach Mark Richt is used to his seat being warmed by loving Georgia fans.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller examines Colorado’s depth. Sadly, he hasn’t been the same since.

• LSU is looking for an “offense,” whatever that is.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans looks at the different persons of interest and trends regarding recruiting services in a four part series. You can either read it yourself or have a stripper read an audio version to you.

• Barry Switzer is surprised you’d even call what Jim Tressel did “cheating.”

• SI.com’s Andy Staples asks SEC questions. The more I watch the accompanying videos, the more I think “Stew n’ Andy” should be a sitcom after “Meet the Browns” on TBS. <– Meant as a compliment.

• According to the Columbus Dispatch and Bob Hunter‘s giant byline picture, ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit moved to Nashville to get away from a small percentage of Ohio State fans we’ll call “The Crazies.”

• Is Miami OT Seantrel Henderson suspended for Miami’s opener at Maryland? Yes? No? Possibly? Anyone?

• UNC CB Charles Brown, who missed the 2010 season due to the school’s mass agent-connected suspensions, will sit out the Heels’ opener before becoming eligible to play.

• The NCAA sees Yahoo!!!!! reports as “supernaturally good at uncovering NCAA violations.” I think this means Charles Robinson has heat vision, though my reading comprehension is pretty low.

• Arkansas should probably be quite good this year. Rivals has the deets. That may be the hippest sentence I’ll ever write.

• Is Connor Wood outperforming the other Texas QBs during spring practice? The view from the  blimp that the Statesman’s Kirk Bohls rented indicates “possibly.”

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Zach Galifianakis preparing for his Mr. T sketch on SNL.

Enjoy your Monday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by NBC News’s Chris Hansen, a proud Michigan State graduate who takes down pedophiles. I assume he was too busy trapping horrible people to watch the Capitol One Bowl. Speaking of pedophiles…

*****

• Charlie Weis is Florida’s new offensive coordinator. Brace yourself for eight solid months of people overanalyzing that sentence.

Oh and Seattle Seahawks DL coach Dan Quinn takes over the other side of the ball as Florida‘s defensive coordinator.

• UConn coach Randy Edsall is now Maryland coach Randy Edsall. It’s not a “splash hire” nearly as much as it is a leaf gently swaying in the wind before it delicately slides into place atop a silent pond.

• The team favored to win the Rose Bowl … won the Rose Bowl.

• Alabama got healthy and promptly beat up on Michigan State. Circle of life.

• New Pitt coach Mike Haywood is now former Pitt coach Mike Haywood (undefeated!) after he was charged with domestic violence.

• Clemson coach Dabo Swinney has fired two offensive coaches after noticing that his team was sans football-moving abilities.

• Ohio St QB Terrelle Pryor has made an enemy in ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit. And that would be after Pryor received three moving violations in three shady loaner car deals. And a shady tattoo investigation. And breaking NCAA rules for selling jerseys and awards. Well played.

• Penn State QB Robert Bolden is joining Penn State QB Kevin Newsome on the transfer train. Prospects take note — it’s a good idea to actually take into account what type of offense is run at your school of choice.

• UConn RB Jordan Todman, the nation’s second leading rusher, declared for the NFL Draft. Sounds about right.

• UCF got a little punchy before during the on-field Liberty Bowl celebration.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have Orange Bowl previews, keys, and more!. Huzzah!

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall channels his inner Jim Delaney in reviewing the Big 10‘s Saturday performance. It’s not pretty.

And then the real Jim Delaney channeled his inner Jim Delaney.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples says Michigan‘s Gator Bowl performance against Mississippi State should spell the end of days for Rich Rodriguez.

• The Wiz has front pages from newspapers from around the country. I checked, he didn’t get any Beetle Bailey screencaps. Bah.

• BCS TV ratings are either amazing or horrible.

• If you attended the TicketCity Bowl, you probably had awesome seats.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is polar bears playing with spy cameras. Obviously.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=tT0O2RyxnkY

Enjoy your Monday + Orange Bowl!

Ty and Dan discuss coaching moves at Maryland, Pittsburgh and (potentially) Michigan and haphazardly offer grades for various bowl teams.  Plus, previews for the remaining seven games, including the BCS Championship.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Navy alumnus David Robinson. How crazy is it that he both attended the Naval Academy AND is nicknamed “The Admiral”? Sometimes life just gets it right.

*****

• Boise State didn’t have much trouble with whatever it was that Utah became/always was. Now we can all look forward to an offseason filled with SEC fans once again labeling them as fraudulent and undeserving because they occasionally lose to a ranked team on the road. The horror!

• Boise State WR Austin Pettis passed it to himself. So there.

• Ohio State suspended six players for the first five games of 2011 for selling off their awards and rings. The names may sound familiar — Terrelle Pryor, Devier Posey, Dan Herron, Mike Adams, and Solomon Thomas.

• Temple has hired former Florida OC Steve Addazio to replace Al Golden as head coach. What? Oh right, they’re Temple.

• San Diego State is scheduled to play Navy tonight in San Diego’s Qualcomm Stadium for the Poinsettia Bowl. Oh and because of heavy rain for a week straight in southern California, Qualcomm Stadium is a kiddie pool. Fun!

• Soon to be former Florida coach Urban Meyer met with ESPN and did a little on-camera work yesterday. If he ends up there in some capacity, I expect one, and only one, fake laugh to be required in his contract.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson tells anybody who will listen what the keys are and what to watch for in tonight’s muddy Poinsettia Bowl. You can take her knowledge to the bank. Or the San Diego County Credit Union, as it were.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers select a team from their respective conferences that needs to “step up.” It’s only a normal “step up” demand, not a full-on “step up 2 the streets” situation.

• Soon to be former Maryland coach Ralph Friedgen wants to coach in 2011. The whole “2010 ACC Coach of the Year” thing is, at the very least, something that will only be seen on his resumé and cover letter.

• In preparation for El Paso’s Sun Bowl, Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly confiscated the passports of his players, due to the proximity of Ciudad Juarez, the nearby Mexican border town whose biggest cultural highlight is still ruthless drug-fueled murder.

• Alabama is upgrading the facilities at the high school they’ll use to practice at in preparation for the Capital One Bowl. Oh and hey, look at that, the #1 safety prospect in the 2011 class (and Alabama commit) goes there. Rad.

• Georgia WR AJ Green denied a report that he’s already decided to forego his senior year and enter the NFL Draft. Which he definitely will do.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for Cedar Rapids, which looks to bring together Ed Helms, John C. Reilly, and State Senator Clay Davis.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJqFUWbITug

Enjoy your Thursday + muddy San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl!

Ty and Dan review a handful of conference championship games and dissect a bunch of projected bowl pairings.

Ty and Dan break down a wild weekend that saw a monster upset by Nevada, a triumphant victory for Auburn, and a defining loss for Rich Rodriguez against Ohio State.  Plus, wackiness in the Big 12, closure in the ACC, and a host of listener Reverbs.

Ty and Dan deliver a super-sized episode, chock full of analysis for all the week’s biggest rivalries, listener e-mails and voice messages.

Ty and Dan talk about LSU’s close call, Nebraska’s dud, a potential Wisconsin-Stanford Rose Bowl, and the ongoing Dillon Baxter Experiment at USC.

Ty & Dan discuss the latest in the Cam Newton pay-for-play situation and the need to renovate Husky Stadium, and break down all the Week 12 action.

Ty and Dan discuss the breaking news about Cam Newton’s recruitment, play voice messages, read e-mails and break down all the Week 10 action.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Will Ferrell, because sometimes it just feels right when somebody as successful and talented as he is, roots for USC and is repeatedly disappointed. I think we’re all just assuming USC’s season is karma for Land of the Lost, anyway.

*****

• The new BCS standings have been released. As have the new polls. I’ve got to agree with the coaches here — screw NC State, how dare they beat Florida State, have the same record, and expect to be ranked ahead of them. Totally lame.

CBS Sports’s Dr. Jerry Palm goes deeper to explain what it all meeeeeaaaaannnns.

• CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd says Texas is past the stage of “laying down.” This makes me think the Dennis Dodd has been actively watching Texas football this season. Kudos.

• Auburn football players love both Halloween, and clearly, their own junk pressed up against tight-fitting clothing.

Yahoo!!!!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday has video.

• Michigan State lost to Iowa. Again and again and again and again.

• Clemson Clemson’d to Boston College. Woops.

• Miami QB Jacory Harris was hit hard at Virginia. You read that correctly.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers file conference race updates. I was a bit disappointed when I learned that this wasn’t Heather Dinich waxing poetic on how people of different cultural backgrounds are getting along in the coastal states.

The bloggers also offer up their power rankings, which are (***SPOILER***) just plain ol’ rankings.

• Notre Dame QB Dayne Crist tore his patella tendon and will be out for six months following yesterday’s surgical procedure to repair his left knee.

• USC is building a $70 million dollar athletic building. I’m told plenty of construction jobs will be available to many needy, under-developed blue chip prospects.

• According to Fox Sports’s Kalani Simpson, Nebraska is back to being Nebraska. It also felt like some old school Kalani Simpson. Kalani’s finally back to being Kalani. Whew.

• The Oregon Duck, Puddles, taught a USC cheerleader how to “Duckie.”

• SB Nation’s Andy Hutchins burrows into some box scores. Unfortunately, you can never unsee whatever it was Washington did on Saturday.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel had a mental breakdown and finally reveals his enemies list. Ok, maybe that just links to this week’s College Football Overtime column. But maybe it doesn’t.

• Week 10 lines are out. Oregon opens at minus “whatever it is, give the points” against Washington.

• The Wiz has week 9 snapshots (via 30fps). I enjoyed Black Redhead Chip Kelly.

• Cal QB Kevin Riley is likely out for the year with a knee injury.

• There’s QB dramaz in Knoxville. Not that it actually matters.

• Virginia Tech will probably win the ACC and nobody seems to care. I just copied that from something I wrote some other year.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a guy singing cartoon theme songs on an acoustic guitar. He’s a huge hit with ladies at lame parties who like foreign, gap-toothed, weird facial-haired musicians. Still good.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZrMvYHFeH60

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan get together on Halloween and recap the Week 9 action, including solid road wins by Oregon and Auburn and tough road losses for Michigan State and Missouri.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Scarlett Johansson, because, well, damnit it just is.

*****

• The latest from Notre Dame regarding the accident with the video assistant. The school has commenced their expected backpedaling.

Fox Sports’s Jason Whitlock thinks the accident should spell Brian Kelly’s exit from the school.

• ESPN has a “Firsthand Account of Life as a College Football Video Coordinator.”

• Michigan State CB Chris Rucker has been reinstated by Spartans coach Mark Dantonio, following a short jail sentence for violating his probation with a DWI. I love that warm, fuzzy feeling I get after reading stories like these.

• Oregon has been quite good this year, but has had some momentary issues on the road. After noticing this, Lane Kiffin immediately pointed out that USC has had issues both on the road AND at home. So there.

• The CFB experts at CBS Sports make their picks for the weekend. No spread, no explanation, just logos. It appears that the only prerequisite for being an “expert” at CBS is having a goatee or being bald, or some sort of combination thereof.

• Matt McGloin will start for Penn State tomorrow. Prediction: We’ll look back on Oct. 30, 2010 as the day Matt McGloin became the greatest college QB in the history of the game.

• ESPN’s team of CFB bloggers go with a Halloween theme while looking at difference conference stories. Just kidding, that’d be crazy lame, right?

• NC State beat Florida State last night in a battle some are calling, “Another Game in Which Two Solid Verbal Coaching Guests Played Each Other.” Pretty accurate if you ask me.

• Something called WhatIf Sports ran hundreds of simulations of tomorrow’s games and posted the results. What does it meeeeeaaannn?

• Remember Choose Your Own Adventure (CYOA to those of us in the know)? SB Nation’s Spencer Hall does, and runs some CYOA game with Auburn. <-- Click link to continue.

• If 7,294 college football writers write columns this week about USC QB Matt Barkley being overlooked, doesn’t that sort of defeat the purpose? SI.com’s Stewart Mandel is 7,295.

• Florida WR Chris Rainey has officially been cleared to play against Georgia tomorrow. Time to (run the) dive (for two yards)!

• Here’s this week’s regional ABC/ESPN map. If you live in North Dakota, want to see Oregon/USC, and don’t have cable or the Internet, you’re pretty much SOL. Wait, how are you reading this, then? Eerie.

• The NFL Draft-niks are cooling on Washington QB Jake Locker. Looks like they finally got around to watching some game tape from the past few years.

• Missouri plays defense very well. Honest.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is of bullet-time surfing in Malaysia — or as we like to call it here, Verbacon 2011.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZlZPmABrLu8

Enjoy your Friday + College Football Saturday.

Dan flies solo (what does this meeeeeean?) and lines up a fierce triple play of college football guests with Clay Travis from AOL Fanhouse, Brian Cook from MGoBlog.com, and friend of the show and House of Run podcast host “West Coast Kevin.”

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Regis Philbin, who, in rooting for Notre Dame Saturday, is unequivocally anti-United States Navy. But probably for stomach-stomping. That rascal.

*****

• Tennessee coach Derek Dooley compared his team to the Germans in World War II. Improperly.

• Notre Dame lost to Navy on Saturday, but only if cheap stomach-stomps aren’t worth 20 points apiece.

• Michigan State CB Chris Rucker drove recklessly, which violated his probation, and landed him in the clink for about a week. You’ll notice a particularly witty line in the linked story about his “new teammates at Ingham County Jail.” It should be noted that those serving time alongside Rucker are not actual “teammates,” but rather, other randomly incarcerated people. Hope that’s now clear.

• Florida coach Urban Meyer isn’t too pleased with much these days, and that includes Gator practices.

• Texas A&M QB Jerrod Johnson may be close to losing his job to backup Ryan Tannehill. I get the feeling that a bunch of guys in camo are shrugging and find this to be reasonable.

• UCLA suspended two more players for violating team rules. I assume in this case that means they’ve been consistently blocking well and running crisp routes.

• Michigan QB Denard Robinson should be good to go against Penn State on Saturday. Unfortunately for Michigan, it’s no longer a month that ends in “-tember.”

• With Matt Simms hobbled by a sore knee, true freshman Tyler Bray has been taking the majority of practice snaps for Tennessee. Derek Dooley looked at it as being very similar to when the Mongols invaded Helsinki. Or something.

• CBS Sports’s Dr. Jerry Palm says Boise State should probably get used to the waiting game. But that’s the hardest part, Jerry. The hardest part.

• Fox Sports’s Peter Schrager says Texas and Cal are examples of how “crazy” this season has been. Except that Cal has been dancing on the fence that separates “wildly inconsistent” and “just kinda bad” for years now. Beating below-average teams at home and losing to decent ones on the road isn’t confounding.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans calls in on the ThayerLine to recap the weekend action. And because it’s Fox Sports, there’s cleavage, Tom Arnold, and penis jokes. Or so I’m assuming.

• How deep does SB Nation’s Spencer Hall roll? Try 26 deep in this week’s Alphabetical.

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) and SI.com’s Cory McCartney debate the pros and cons of various free trade regulations. Ok, just kidding, they mostly repeat themselves (and each other) while discussing the Heisman on their respective sites.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day looks at how neat nature truly is. Really, it’s Neature.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hm3JodBR-vs

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan make their picks for Week 8 and discuss the Pac-12 division decision, the new Rose Bowl sponsor, and the notion of taking an automatic weapon into a crowded stadium (instead of buying a ticket).  Plus, Verballer e-mails.

Ty and Dan do their first show since meeting face-to-face in Lincoln, Nebraska and rehash VerbaCon 2010 as well as the other action during Week 7.

Ty and Dan preview all the Week Seven action on the eve of their first ever meeting in Nebraska for Verbacon 2010.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Warren Buffett, Nebraska’s wealthiest investor/Husker fan. Word has begun leaking that he has been unable sleep due to the exciting combination of Taylor Martinez running read veer options and, obviously, Verbacon. So typical.

*****

• North Carolina‘s Marvin Austin (DT), Robert Quinn (DE), and Greg Little (WR) have all been lost due to their involvement with an agent and the benefits they each received. Austin was dismissed, with Quinn and Little ruled permanently ineligible. Even more importantly, Marvin Austin is no longer the Dan Rubenstein College Football Crush. This is now on loop.

• As you now know, LSU coach Les Miles called a fake FG that ultimately led to the Gators’ demise. It worked even better in 2007.

• Oregon RB and return specialist Kenjon Barner was released from a hospital in Pullman, WA after sustaining a big-hit concussion on a kick return against Washington State.

• Oregon State WR James Rodgers, just back from a concussion, suffered a bad knee injury. There’s video, but it isn’t pleasant. The good news is he’s apparently eligible for a medical hardship waiver. Human reaction: Good. Duck reaction: Damn.

• Saturday box score analysis, courtesy of SB Nation and Yahoo!’s Dr. Saturday. I’m still waiting to hear back regarding inquiry regarding the newly formed MAC-themed Dr. Tuesday/Wednesday blog. Fingers crossed.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel drops knowledge bombs covering the college football landscape, and even mentions, thanks to fantasy football and the downfall of Marvin Austin, my new college football crush: Justin Blackmon. I hope this doesn’t sound like hyperbole, but in Dana Holgorson’s offense, he’s essentially a combination of Michael Crabtree and Blanca from Street Fighter II.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples ponders the rest of the SEC season after Alabama’s loss at South Carolina. ***Spoiler*** Everyone’s going to lose to somebody at some point in the SEC the rest of the way, and Alabama will still probably win the West. Ok fine, if the Tide decide to hand it off to Mark Ingram and Trent Richardson.

• LSUFreek is the best college football animated Gif artist (you heard me) on the planet, and should other planets have football leagues attached to academic institutions, he probably already photoshops heads of personalities in that league onto their art and cinema.

• A Michigan fan swears a lot while watching the Wolverines lose to Michigan State. Language is salty and NSFW, unless you work in some sort of F*ck Factory. And if you do, get back to f*ckin’ work, you f*ckin’ slacker. (via EDSBS)

• Speaking of which, Michigan themselves got “Lloydballed” by the Spartans. I hadn’t read that term until this morning, at which point, I just stared at the text and laughed at its simple genius.

• ESPN’s team of CFB bloggers give conference power rankings, helmet stickers, a list of what they learned, and get in a group dance-fight. What? Sometimes you just have to dance-fight.

• Here are this week’s opening lines.

• The Wiz has the Screengrabs O’ the Week. Brock Huard possibly teases Mike Bellotti’s right nipple in one of them. Not a joke.

• Stanford QB Andrew Luck tackled USC CB Shareece Wright after the Trojan recovered a fumble. Excuse me, I believe the correct term is “laidimthefuggout.”‘

• Adidas is introducing new “TECHFIT” jerseys for, among other teams, UCLA, Tennessee, Michigan, and Notre Dame. I hereby demand an ND jersey for Ty, as he will feel lighter and faster while pacing over the Irish letting another subpar team climb back into a game. Demand!

Also, RIP Wallace.

Today’s Video of the Day is The Simpsons über-dark couch sequence opening last night, storyboarded by Banksy, the popular street artist. I enjoyed the dolphin head.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DX1iplQQJTo

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Six action and break down the losses by Alabama, Arizona and Michigan as well as the wins by LSU, Auburn and Oregon.  Plus, another rousing rendition of Saturday ReVerbs.

Ty and Dan delve into a few voice messages and some e-mails, and discuss their picks for Week Six.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Jimmy Buffett, who seems to enjoy eating cheeseburgers in tropical places and towns named after mixed drinks. He also owns Landshark Lager. I don’t know what a “landshark” is, but I imagine he’s pleased Ole Miss is considering making his made-up animal its mascot.

*****

• Florida QB John Brantley has injured ribs. But he’s doing great!

• Former Virginia coach (and current Georgia Tech defensive Allow More-dinator) Al Groh will face off against former assistant and now UVa head coach Mike London. It’s like master vs student, only Al Groh isn’t a master, and nobody cares.

• Wisconsin and Pitt each came into the season with excellent, well-known running backs. Now, John Clay (Wisc) and Dion Lewis (Pitt) both may not be as good as their backups. Next!

• Players in the Big 10 are injured. Beep beep ba beep beep beep ba beep beep. That was me typing out an old fashioned telegraph spitting out the headlines. Really for no reason.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde‘s weekly “Forde Yard Dash” is out. ***Dan’s Notes*** Lots of Les Miles, coaching, plays-per-minute, Ana Ivanovic, previews, something about steaks.

• SVBFF and SB Nation’s Brian Cook drops The Week in Schadenfreude. It made me laugh. And a little gassy. Weird.

• Various people continue to rank players for an important award only eligible to certain positions. The Heisman Pundit, SB Nation, and Fox Sports publish these people. Ndamukong Suh will not be clicking any of these links, and with good reason.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples doesn’t just rank teams, he ranks them in powerful fashion. After each entry, I like to imagine he pounds his desk with a fist and yells, “BOOM!” That’s power, children.

• Ole Miss revealed possible mascots to be the new Rebel. I kind of like the bear, and that’s as nice as I can possibly be. Whatever, I happen to like bears wearing hats that bears never wear.

• Arizona State LB Vontaze Burfict, aka The Walking Personal Foul, aka 15 Yards for Unsportsmanlike Conduct, aka The First Guy to Ever Rip Out a Spleen on a Football Field, has been benched. I wonder if this play or that play have anything to do with it. We may never know.

• ESPN’s Lou Holtz is trolling for Republican votes using cheesy football metaphors. Awww, so friggin’ adorable.

• Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly analyzes the differences between two of the teams that beat him, Michigan and MIchigan State, who play each other this weekend in Ann Arbor. Solid analysis before Kelly gave the coaching advantage to Michigan’s Rich Rodriguez because of his wonderful stent-free arteries. What an animal.

Today’s Video of the Day is another one from the Harvard Sailing Team, who doesn’t sail and is not a team. And has nothing to do with Harvard. It’s called “Boys Will Be Girls: Night Out.”

www.youtube.com/watch?v=FukzyfIqYf8

Enjoy your Wednesday. Totes.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Tina Fey, who played Sarah Palin, who graduated (after her half-dozen school tour) from Idaho, who has their own painted Horizon plane, on which Palin will never ever fly. Hockey moms fly PRIVATE, yo.

*****

• Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio was released from the hospital today after his heart attack and subsequent blood clot. Without any medical knowledge, I’ll just go ahead and assume he was implanted with an ultra-powerful gorilla heart and the Spartans will thereby crush Michigan in Ann Arbor. And yes, I know none of that made any sense. Blame caffeine.

• UNC (temp) coach Butch Davis is sorry he ever trusted formed assistant John Blake. The only way this ongoing saga could get more ridiculous is if at some point somebody rips off an intricate flesh mask revealing their true identity as Cherokee Parks. You heard me.

Also, it’s been lost in the mess, but UNC QB TJ Yates has been good. I know, right?

• Texas coach Mack Brown may be forced out. It seems completely ludicrous, but apparently Will Muschamp is a lock to be a wildly successful head coach (for the first time).

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly was reprimanded by the Pac-10 for his halftime comments to Erin Andrews during the Stanford game. I’d say it was worth it.

• Miami QB Jacory Harris has, depending on who you ask, a bruised shoulder or a sprained AC joint. The good news is he’s expected to eventually be cleared to haplessly launch balls down the field with no regard for triple coverage. Whew.

• Alabama WR Julio Jones has an injured knee and is day-to-day ahead of the Tide’s game against South Carolina. Since Jones is clearly a robot bent on the destruction of silly human defensive backs, I suspect something else is afoot.

• EDSBS’s Holly Anderson (Peete) has stickers! For everyone! Ok not everyone, just inhumanly athletic people that excel or disappoint on Saturdays.

• ESPN‘s team of CFB bloggers rewind and fast forward. And then order some shady PPV on the sly.

• EDSBS’s Spencer Hall drops this week’s Alphabetical. I don’t get all the references, but Weepy Dawson makes up for all.

• SI.com’s Cory McCartney checks in with his Week 5 Heisman Watch. The Nard Dog… is still #1.

• Horizon Air has painted one of their planes with a University of Idaho theme. The school president can now stop being so prissy when it comes to flying in themed planes. Whew.

Today’s Video of the Day is Conan getting naughty with a hose and his desk. It made me tingly in a way that I’m still uncomfortable talking about.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUus_-DEpTA

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Five action and talk about another fabulous performance by Denard Robinson.

Ty and Dan plow through voice messages and emails before previewing the first slate of October games in the 2010 college football season.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ty Burrell of Modern Family (on tonight). Beyond Burrell being an Oregon native and Duck fan, his character even referenced the 1995 Rose Bowl beatdown at the hands of Penn State, where he attended grad school. Weird. Thanks Wikipedia!

*****

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) likes Terrelle Pryor to take home the Heisman. The Heisman Pundit does not.

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly received a six year extension, which pays him about $2.4 million a year through 2015. I was this close to linking a Dido song to best express how I felt upon hearing the news, but I held back. Or did I?

• Georgia WR AJ Green, who has been suspended for four games and will make his debut against Colorado this week, first became a person of interest  due to an inaccurate report from TMZ. Honestly, if you can’t trust the integrity of a bunch of dudes with no-lens hipster glasses wearing $93 used t-shirts saying things like, “We have Harrison Ford leaving Koi…”, who can you really turn to? (via Dr. Saturday)

• The Big East wants TCU. And TCU was all like, “Oh hey, that’s, wow, I mean thank you, but you know, I’ve got plans already. Dang.”

• Boise State RB DJ Harper is out for the year with a torn ACL. While they’ll tell you it happened during the Oregon State game, you can never rule out foul play from Boise State safety Jeron Johnson, who WILL NOT REST until he’s the only healthy player on the field. No ACL is safe!!!

• Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio will be back coaching the Spartans this Saturday -- but from the booth against Wisconsin. If Michigan State doesn’t pull away and end it early against the Badgers, thereby limiting any possible tension, it’s almost like they hate their own coach’s well-being. Think about it.

• Boise State has a dog that retrieves the tee after kickoffs. Everyone thinks it’s a pretty cute new little tradition. Everyone… BUT JERON JOHNSON!!

• The Wiz has videos of various CFB cheap shots. The rocky mountain region really seems to like unabashedly injuring people.

• North Carolina State is 4-0. Just thought we needed a reminder.

Today’s Video of the Day is a Durex commercial. Durex: The Official Prophylactic of Today’s College Football Links.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyahoTR1Otk

Enjoy your Wednesday. But not too much, horndogs.

Ty and Dan replay all the Week Four action, including impressive wins by SEC teams, letdown showings by the Big 12, and the dawning of a special new Big Ten tradition.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you Colorado cheerleaders. I don’t need a reason, but they seem like they’ll be excited for the Pac-Twen.

*****

• The Heisman Pundit released his Week 3 Heisman poll. It all seems fairly reasonable given how early it is in the season, so we’ll take this time to unveil our Heisman Ranker Power Rankings:

1. Heisman Pundit -- Chris Huston built his own site, keeps it updated with useful information, and came on the show last year. Winner.

2. Cory McCartney -- He’s now apparently SI’s Mr. Heisman Watch, and other than putting Ryan Mallett #2, Cory’s weekly column is trending upwards.

3. Holly Anderson -- I’m still dubious on Mallett, but as SB Nation’s in-house Heismaness and a contributor to EDSBS, it’s a great weekly read. She also calls Colin Kaepernick “The Angry Ostrich,” which is reason enough to get on board.

4. ESPN Rotation -- Minus points for not having a dedicated weekly Heisman writer, but the poll is clean, the explanations clear, and points are added on for including how many votes each player is receiving in each place.

5. CBS Rotation -- Similar to ESPN’s, but they get minus points for their horrible fantasy sports setup. I know it has nothing to do with the Heisman, but it really is THAT bad.

• ESPN‘s bloggers look at whose stock is up or down in various conferences. Without having looked at all the stock reports, I’m guessing Washington’s D-line stock is listed at “SELL SELL SELL, OH GOD SELL!”

• Colorado is officially joining the Pac-Twen next year. Eventually, the Buffaloes will be good and everyone will love the new rivalries and going to Boulder, etc. For now, though, VICTORIES FOR ALL!*

*Except you, Cougs.

• The great news is Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio is out of the hospital after suffering a minor heart attack following the Spartans’ narrow victory over Notre Dame Saturday night. The bad news is that the possibility of a Spartan being charged with a felony has increased significantly these past few months

• Iowa RB Jewel Hampton is out for the season with a torn ACL, his second straight campaign to be shortened by an ACL injury. Attention Knees of the World: Avoid Tucson.

• Jake Heaps is now, after a debilitating shoulder injury to Riley Nelson, BYU’s lone starting QB. This makes things considerably easier for Cougar fans, who no longer have to ask, “Was that Nelson or Heaps who just lost his receivers?”

Today’s Video of the Day features a dog that pops balloons. After watching this video, I’ve never hated balloons more.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cX6JUoYbP1Q

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Click Chorus is brought to you by Ed O’Neill, former Ohio U student. I’m guessing that he approves of both his school’s mascot taking out Ohio State’s Brutus, but also of watching TV wife Sofia Vergara on tomorrow night’s Modern Family premiere. God, I love Colombia.

*****

• Oregon State painted their field blue in preparation for Saturday’s game at Boise State. You’ll immediately be able to tell how comfortable Ryan Katz will be overthrowing his receivers in a new environment.

• Houston QB Case Keenum will have an uphill battle if he intends to apply for medical hardship waiver after the season. As will Georgia‘s defensive line, as “We’re not very strong” is not typically an accepted argument.

• Missouri DE Aldon Smith will miss at least a couple weeks with a broken fibula. We hear at Solid Verbal HQ would like to wish the dominant Smith a speedy recovery, mostly because of his awesome hair.

• A Michigan student will try out to be the Wolverines new kicker. Even if he’s good, he has about 38,000 practice hours to catch up on. (via The Wiz)

• Arizona printed a shirt commemorating a non-conference September victory against Iowa. Just….no.

• A cheesy radio host who broadcasts to Michigan/Indiana border towns tries to make the point that God hates it when coaches outsmart Notre Dame. And if the current sales numbers for radio are any indication, God kinda hates sports radio too. (via EDSBS)

• Solid Verbal BFF Chip Brown reports on OrangeBloods that Colorado may join the Pac Twen in 2011 after all. And Jeff Tedford’s all for the Buffs joining in October.

• Ohio‘s Bobcat tackled Ohio State’s Brutus on Saturday in what apparently was a premeditated attack. Because really, what else are you going to do in Athens, OH other than sit around and plan a mascot attack or hope that someday you end up with a TV wife like Sofia Vergara. (VIDEO)

Today’s Video of the Day is the Harvard Sailing Team sketch comedy group doing the best Mystic River video I’ve seen this month.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uhv3uXMriRk

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan talk about a wild evening slate of Week 3 games and dissect all the other action from Saturday.

Ty and Dan talk with Teddy Greenstein of the Chicago Tribune about his frenetic week of expansion reporting, the Big Ten’s ultimate decision to add Nebraska, the future divisions of the conference, and the timeless “stine” vs. “steen” debate.

Ty and Dan take a closer look at the stories to watch this spring in the Big Ten.  Plus, a spirited round of messages, a hater, and sidebars about Kirk Herbstreit’s tan and Lane Kiffin’s shirt size.

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Website: http://www.solidverbal.com

Ty and Dan talk with Matt Sanderson from the Playoff PAC (found at PlayoffPAC.com), a political action committee lobbying Congress to reform the way college football crowns a national champion.  Should government be involved in these types of decisions?  What’s being done?  Most importantly, can it actually work?  All that, plus a quick review of the week that was in the world of college football, as well as an update on the Solid Verbal pick’em pools and fantasy league.

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E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: www.solidverbal.com

Ty and Dan are joined by Josh McCuistion from SoonerScoop.com to discuss Sam Bradford’s visit to Dr. James Andrews, the reputation of the Big 12, and the possibility of non-BCS team playing for the BCS Championship.  Plus, voice messages, e-mails, and the beginning of the open competition for The Solid Verbal’s host city in 2010.

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E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: http://www.solidverbal.com

Ty and Dan review a fantastic third week of the college football regular season, paying special attention to the three most notable games of the week (Tennessee-Florida, Georgia Tech-Miami, Washington-USC.  Plus, voice messages (we got one from a female!) and a brief chat with a member of the Solid Verbal fantasy league (Joe from CollegeGameBalls.com).

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E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: http://www.solidverbal.com

Throughout August, we will be counting down the top 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season.  Today, we take a stroll up College Avenue, stop by for a cone of Peachy Paterno, visit with the crazies at Paternoville, and close out the night with some ponies at the Rathskellar.

That’s right, boys and girls… WE ARE… PENN STATE!

First Impressions

It’s 8:00 AM on a football Saturday.  You need only listen to the hustle and bustle of downtown State College to understand the electricity surrounding Penn State football.  Close your eyes and listen; the sounds of the crowd tell the story.  The pitter-patter of thousands of shoes wandering down College Avenue is purer than raindrops on a tin roof.  The trumpets emanating from the Student Bookstore are crisper than the cool, autumn air of central Pennsylvania.  The chants of students echo throughout Beaver Canyon like a megaphone in a bandshell.

It’s four hours before game time, and this is Penn State.  WE are Penn State.

I proudly say “we”, because it wasn’t all that long ago that I was a student.  I know that football means a lot to this place, because it built this place — it transformed the area from a small farming school in 1855 to the tier-one university it is in 2009.  It’s an institution that built an institution.  Its profits are the bricks for the state-of-the-art buildings that dot campus.  Its coach’s impact has been, both literally and figuratively, monumental.

And so it is, again, with Joe Paterno‘s humble attitude that the Nittany Lions take the field this season — for the 44th time, to be exact — in hopes of getting over the humps and bumps of yesteryear and returning back to the glory of 1986, their last championship year.  A BCS championship was oh-so-close last season, but with veteran leadership returning this year Penn State lies in the weeds, lurking as a darkhorse contender, ready to pounce on an opportunity that has eluded the program for 23 years.

Last Year

Plain and simple, Penn State was one game away from playing for a BCS title.  A letdown 24-23 loss at Iowa only two weeks after beating Ohio State was all it took to knock the Lions from national championship contention.  Though a Rose Bowl matchup against USC was a respectable consolation prize, it was painful to be that close to the BCS Championship and come away empty-handed, especially for a exciting contingent of senior receivers named Derrick Williams, Deon Butler, and Jordan Norwood.

You could argue that Penn State played a weak schedule — and it did — but outside that disappointing Iowa game, it outplayed every single opponent, including an Oregon State team that beat USC and an Ohio State squad that almost upended Texas in the Fiesta Bowl.  In a season as crazy as 2008, that feat was absolutely something of which to be proud.

The Lions used a “Spread HD” attack crafted by the much-maligned Jay Paterno to fuel its offense.  Led by veteran Daryll Clark, a breakout season by RB Evan Royster, and the aforementioned contingent of WRs, Penn State averaged 206 yards per game on the ground, and nearly 250 yards per game through the air.  Likewise, the Lions’ defense was just as successful, holding opponents to a mere 2.8 yards per rush and less than 200 passing yards per game.

People

This season will be known as the year of Daryll Clark, Evan Royster, Navorro Bowman, and Sean Lee.  Clark, who seems like he’s in his 85th year of eligibility, will need to improve his passing game in order to excel with a less-experienced group of receivers including Graham Zug, Brett Brackett and Chaz Powell.  However, Evan Royster — fresh off a 1,200-yard campaign in 2008 — should help alleviate some of that pressure, running behind an offensive line that is less-experienced than last year, but still fairly solid.

Defensively, the return of Lee from an ACL injury will make the Lions’ defense that much tougher.  Lee, who most definitely would’ve been a top NFL pick if not for his injury, will join up this season with Navorro Bowman, who led all Penn Staters last year with 106 tackles, 12.5 of which were for losses.

This Year

Penn State’s conference schedule is slightly more difficult than last season, meaning that another potential run at a Big Ten / BCS Title is a distinct possibility, but arguably harder.  Look for the Lions to roll through September with big wins over Akron, Syracuse, Temple, and an Iowa team that ruined its season in ’08.  But as the calendar turns to October, Penn State will face its first true test on the road against an Illinois team picked by many to be a Big Ten contender.  Three weeks later, the Lions hit the road again and travel to Michigan, for what should be a closer game than last year’s 46-17 massacre.  November poses two challenges: Ohio State in State College and Michigan State in East Lansing.

Conclusion

Penn State should be considered a favorite to win the Big Ten championship and be selected to a BCS bowl game.  However, there is no escaping the fact that the Lions lost a considerable chunk of their offense when their receivers graduated, and I just cannot see this team going undefeated, not with potential losses looming in the form of Illinois, Ohio State, and Michigan State.  Consider the matchup with Illinois to be a bellwether for the remainder of the 2009 season — the Lions are 3-6 since 2000 in Big Ten road openers.

That said, there are at least 10 wins on this schedule.  No question about it.  The question, though, is can the Lions get back to 11 wins like they did in 2008.  The Big Ten will be better in ’09, and quite honestly, I’m just not comfortable saying they will.

Prediction

10-2

Highlights Set To Sweet Music From Varsity Blues and Aerosmith

www.youtube.com/watch?v=DXJv_32KC4M

--Ty

Throughout August, we will be counting down the top 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season.  Today, we travel deep within SEC territory to Athens, Georgia, a place that hates Ty Hildenbrandt and will have its opportunity to seek barbaric revenge when he visits on September 26th.

First Impressions

Two seasons ago, I penned the following line regarding Georgia football in an effort to draw a parallel between the Bulldogs and the great WWF star “The Ultimate Warrior“:

Hulk Hogan once described The Ultimate Warrior as a “flat character.” Is that not Georgia? Other than a wild touchdown celebration against Florida, the Dawgs have no real defining characteristics. Likewise, they continually fall short of being THE team to beat in college football, content on going 8-4, 9-3, or 10-2 every season.

Never in my life have I been so afraid.  This statement resonated throughout Dawg Nation like a crying baby in a crowded church.  And I was inundated, relentlessly, with messages from angry fans, all of whom contested every syllable of the three sentences I had inadvertently used to launch a pseudo-controversy.  It was undoubtedly the closest I had ever come to being beaten by an angry mob while attempting a joke about a once-superstar in an imaginary sport.

It was then that I realized what Georgia football was all about.  Though I stand by those initial statements — Georgia still hasn’t gotten over that proverbial hump on the national stage — I realize that Georgia sees it differently.  Georgia doesn’t lower its standards when it falls short; if anything, it raises them.  (And its fans sure as hell didn’t appreciate me poking a stick in their wound.)

That’s where we’re at with the Dawgs in 2009.  Only a year ago, this team was loaded for bear with Matthew Stafford and Knowshon Moreno on offense, and a preseason No. 1 ranking to its credit.  But as losses amassed against Alabama, Florida and Georgia Tech, it became clear that Georgia was somewhat overrated.  It also became clear that Georgia, at least under Mark Richt, thrives better when it can fly under the radar.  And, well, hello 2009.

As Stafford and Moreno were both first round NFL picks, and the focus in the SEC has shifted to teams such as Florida, Alabama, LSU and Ole Miss, Georgia again finds itself lurking in the weeds, perhaps an upset or two away from making an improbable run.

Last Year

Georgia started the 2008 season as the preseason No. 1 team in the country behind Matthew Stafford‘s arm, and Knowshon Moreno‘s legs.  But it simply wasn’t meant to be.  After starting the year 3-0, Georgia was downed in Sanford Stadium by Alabama, dashing their dreams of a march through the SEC, and launching another title run, indirectly, for the Crimson Tide.

The Dawgs, however, got their act together and hammered out three consecutive wins against Tennessee, Vanderbilt and LSU (in Baton Rouge), setting up a showdown in Jacksonville with another one-loss SEC team: Florida.  But that wasn’t meant to be, either.  The Gators had Georgia on their mind after Mark Richt’s premeditated antics in 2007, and subsequently rolled up a 49-10 blowout victory, which essentially stole the Dawgs’ soul in the second half, and for the remainder of the season.  Two-loss Georgia was out of contention.

And that was pretty much that.  Georgia mailed it in.  In its final three regular season games, the Dawgs survived two back-to-back road scares against Kentucky and Auburn, before eventually succumbing to Georgia Tech to end its season.  Though Georgia won the Capital One Bowl over Michigan State, 2008 was a huge disappointment.

People

Though Georgia loses its two biggest names, the team, as a whole, returns 15 starters.  Get used to names like QB Joe Cox, RB Caleb King, and an underrated group of WRs led by AJ Green and Michael Moore, and a veteran group of defenders led by Geno Atkins, Rennie Curran and Reshad Jones.  Coach Mark Richt will again be in charge of navigating the ship through treacherous SEC waters.  This is the kind of underdog squad with which he is known to excel.  However, one of his most important tasks will be trying to drive a better turnover differential — the last two times Georgia‘s differential has been in the black, the Dawgs have qualified for a BCS bowl.

This Year

Georgia will be tested early when it travels to Stillwater to square off against Oklahoma State, arguably the second-best team in the Big 12, on September 5th.  More importantly, it will provide a very early glimpse at what Georgia’s defense can do against a high-powered offense, which has been a concern over the last few years (the Dawgs’ average points allowed has steadily increased from 16.4 to 24.5 since 2005).

The biggest challenge, however, will be maneuvering another grueling year in the SEC.   This schedule is littered with potential landmines, and quite simply, there are no breaks.  After Okie State, Georgia is looking at South Carolina, @Arkansas, Arizona State, LSU, @Tennessee, @Vanderbilt, Florida (in Jacksonville), Tennessee Tech (OK, this might be a break), Auburn, Kentucky, and @Georgia Tech.  Such is life in the SEC.  The good news is that the Dawgs have a favorable home schedule; the bad news is that LSU, Florida and Georgia Tech could all be major flies in the ointment.

Perhaps the biggest challenge for Mark Richt will be finding better harmony between offense and defense.  Simply put, the offense cannot be asked to win every game, and the defense MUST step up and do its share if this season is going to exceed expectations.

Conclusions

Georgia is surprisingly deep in 2009, and in a familiar role in which it has succeeded before under Mark Richt.  Mark me down as a believer that this team will be extremely competitive in every single game, with losses only against Oklahoma State and Florida.

Prediction:

10-2

Ty and Dan recap their college fantasy football draft and discuss how it differs from more conventional fantasy leagues.  Plus, SI.com’s Stewart Mandel stops by to chat about the Coaches’ Poll, USC’s potential QB controversy, and which coach he’d pick to give a best man’s speech.  And, of course, your wacky e-mail messages.  (Episode #51)

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Throughout August, we will be counting down the 25 teams (as listed here) going into the 2009 season. Today, we travel (figuratively) to South Bend, Indiana, to preview the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame.  Seeing as how this write-up was authored by Notre Dame fan extraordinaire Ty Hildenbrandt, you should expect a heavily biased and bitterly sarcastic perspective of the 2009 season.  If you can’t handle that, then go somewhere else, damn it.

First Impressions

If there were ever a year for Notre Dame to reach the 10-win plateau, it is 2009.  In fact, it MUST happen this year, otherwise the Irish echoes will be awoken not by the ghost of Rockne, but rather by the cries for Charlie Weis‘ head on a silver platter.  With an offense returning several veteran, playmaking pieces and a defense that started getting organized in the second half of 2008, the table is set for a healthy run through one of the weakest schedules the school has ever seen.  Simply put, there can be no excuses this time around.

Looming large on October 17th is Notre Dame‘s yearly gut check against USC, a game that will most certainly define their season.  Still, plenty of other questions remain.  Will this be the year that Jimmy Clausen lives up the hype?  Will this be the year that Notre Dame finally learns how to win the battles in the trenches?  Will this be the year that Notre Dame finally deserves a preseason top-25 ranking?  Only time will tell.

Last year

Though a 7-6 season with a bowl victory was a marked improvement over 2007′s 3-9 campaign, the Irish‘s 2008 season will be forever marred by a stunning loss to Syracuse that nearly derailed the Charlie Weis Train and almost sent Ty Hildenbrandt into a downward spiral of alcoholism.  Not cool.  That, in conjunction with a 38-3 bedwetting against USC, and Notre Dame‘s season couldn’t help but be viewed as a disappointment.  Wins against San Diego State, Michigan, Purdue, Stanford, Washington, Navy, and Hawaii were nice.  Losses against Michigan State, North Carolina, Pitt, Boston College, Syracuse, and USC were not.

The main problem with Notre Dame‘s 2008 campaign was its offensive line.  In two unceremonious years, Jimmy Clausen has shown signs of brilliance; however, the majority of his dropbacks have been under serious duress.  Offensively, this inability to block had a cataclysmic effect on the team’s ability to deliver a balanced attack.  Specifically, they couldn’t run the football, ranking 100th in rushing offense and averaging only 3.27 yards per carry.  Clausen was being asked to win every game — a task nearly impossible for a quarterback with no protection.

But the season was not a complete loss.  ND‘s 49-21 win in the Sheraton Hawaii Bowl was impressive, and it became apparent that Clausen could flourish with some protection and three surehanded targets (Golden Tate, Michael Floyd and Duval Kumara).  However, was this a legitimate leap forward, or just an aberration against a mediocre opponent.  We shall see.

People

You already know about Jimmy Clausen, whose 3,172 passing yards quietly put him at 23rd in the nation amid all the other hoopla surrounding Charlie Weis’ future with the team.  Clausen got a bad rap as a showboat with the way he entered college (and for his ghastly haircut to start the ’08 season), but, by all accounts, he’s a model teammate and one of the hardest workers on the team.  With more support, he will blossom into the talent that many thought he’d be.

This year, that support comes in the form of several offensive weapons.  Golden Tate had a breakout year in ’08 with 1,080 yards receiving and figures to be Clausen‘s main deep threat.  Complementing Tate is surehanded sophomore Michael Floyd, who logged 700+ yards of his own.  And not to be overlooked at slot man Duval Kumara, or tight end Kyle Rudolph.  According to Phil Steele, this is the best receiving corps in the nation.

Notre Dame’s offensive line is anchored by 6’8″ tackle Sam Young.  While the last two years have certainly fallen short of expectation, 2008 was still a major improvement from 2007, and 2009 figures continue trending upwards.  This unit is experienced and needs to step up to help Armando Allen become more effective as a running back.

Defensively, look for coordinator Jon Tenuta to be aggressive and attack opposing offenses, and the move back to a 4-3 base seems like a smart move.  The Irish defense was better than most realize in 2008.  Listen for names like SS Kyle McCarthy, FS Harrison Smith and a speedy group of linebackers with Brian Smith, Steve Filer, and freshman Manti Te’o.

This Year

This team should be able to score points, especially against a weak schedule.  The opening game against Nevada will provide an immediate test for the Irish in the form of Colin Kaepernick‘s dangerous passing attack.  On paper, outside Michigan State on September 19th and USC in mid-October, there should be no other potential losses on the schedule.  But the games aren’t played on paper, and you never know when this team is going to have a recurrence of its hiccups from 2007 and 2008.  Remaining unmentioned opponents: @Michigan, @Purdue, Washington, USC, Washington State (in San Antonio, TX… for some reason), Navy, @Pitt, Connecticut, and @Stanford.  Yeah.  Don’t be afraid to be the OVER.

Conclusions

This should be the best team Charlie Weis has fielded in his rocky tenure.  And that’s good for him, because in light of last season’s bowl victory, the standard for 2009 is a BCS berth.  No way around it.  Notre Dame has all the pieces in place to make a run at an undefeated season, and it’s not out of the question to think that this team could down USC on October 17th.  Realistically, though, you should expect a loss against the Trojans and one other wildcard team (maybe Michigan State).  As a Notre Dame fan, I am cautiously optimistic and excited about this season.

Prediction

10-2

Highlights Set To Unfortunate Music

www.youtube.com/watch?v=d7QSs27MJlU

--Ty

Ty and Dan welcome Phil Steele to the program to talk about the creation of his yearly magazine, teams to watch around the country, thoughts from last season, and his prediction for the 2010 BCS Championship Game.  Plus, random thoughts on the Michael Jackson tribute, Nick Saban’s digs at Utah, the meaningless BCS hearings, and some new slogans for various programs around the country.

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