Ty and Dan break down the impressive victories by LSU and Alabama, Michigan’s triumph over Ohio State, the Heisman credentials of Montee Ball, UCLA’s march to Pac-12 South glory, and all the other action from Rivalry Week.  Plus, your Reverbs.

Ty and Dan talk about Cam Newton’s miserable Heisman speech and the Big Ten’s laughable press conference before bringing Andy Staples back to discuss all the coaching moves in the world of college football.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Jenn Sterger, who, as a Florida State grad, must be pleased with how Mark Stoops has handled the D. Whatever happened to her?

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• Alabama WR Julio Jones broke his hand in the first half of Saturday’s South Carolina game. He had surgery the following day to have a screw inserted. Psh, like his hand isn’t already made of bionic parts already.

• Oregon State WR James Rodgers is officially out for the remainder of the season after his knee injury at Arizona on Saturday. He’s a small dude, but as a Duck/football fan, I’m equally terrified and excited every time he plays. But mostly terrified.

• The Rose Bowl, the best/worst stadium in college football, is getting a $152 million dollar renovation. To be honest, I’m going to miss their original Gameboy-sized video screen, 20 minute waits in the entrance tunnels, and hot benches. Oh no wait, no I’m not. Huzzah!

• Three UCLA starters will be suspended for next Thursday’s Oregon game. Discipline is admirable, but only sending 8 guys out there against the #2 team in the country? Risky.

• Houston QB Case Keenum will apply for a medical hardship waiver after blowing out his knee against UCLA a few weeks ago. He’s also expected to summarily beg Dana Holgorsen to come back to the Cougars, which is the only way this story matters.

• The Pac-10 is working on splitting up into divisions in preparation for Utah and Colorado. Stanford and Cal are causing problems. Nerds!

• Two Washington State RS freshmen were growing dozens of pot plants in their rented house. Police said that growing that many plants was a “big deal.” The players are agreed, but their high five attempts with police were immediately rebuffed. (via SbB)

• EDSBS’s Spencer Hall ranks some college football announcers, submits his weekly Alphabetical column, while Holly Anderson (Peete) doles out some classy stickers.

• The season is about 40% done, so why not hammer out some Heisman thoughts? SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete), SI.com’s Cory McCartney, and ESPN’s team of randoms are happy to oblige. Yahoo!!!!!!!! takes it one step further and ranks just about everybody by position.

• The Week in Schadenfreude from SVBFF and SB Nation’s Brian Cook. God help us all if this column becomes terrible and we all delight in its failure. That’s what’s called a double-meta blackhole. What does it meeeeaaaannnnn?

• Smart Football’s Chris Brown has his Smart Notes up, which looks at the key types of plays that led to wins. I feel smarter just linking to this.

• ESPN’s team of CFB bloggers look back at the first half of the season and do a quick rewind/fast forward. Thankfully, they also finally show us how to properly trim spare ribs prior to cooking. Find the flap!

• Lost in the hilari-depressing USC season is the breakout performance of true freshman WR Robert Woods, who finished with over 200 yards receiving in the Trojans’ loss at Stanford. Quite simply, dude be fast.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a perfect commercial for Stella Artois, directed by Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola. It’s too early for beer, Dan. It’s too early for beer.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=7pq8u2orRLU

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Rick Sanchez, the CNN anchor who likes college football so much that he, well, gets torn apart by Jon Stewart (go to 6:20).

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• SI.com’s Cory McCartney and ESPN‘s scrappy group of bloggers weigh in on the Heisman race. Cal QB Kevin Riley checks in at 947th and 835th, respectively.

• Alabama QB Greg McElroy has some sore tender bits after Saturday’s Arkansas game.

• Sports Illustrated released this week’s cover, which will hopefully lead to more people arguing that Boise State doesn’t play anyone, and if they played in another conference, they’d be a three-win team. MAX.

• Yahoo’s (!) Matt Hinton loves Auburn’s awesome (and possibly dangerous) pregame tradition. I’ve always wondered if the eagle has ever pooped while swooping around. A swoop-and-poop, if you will. Please let me know at solidverbal@gmail.com, with the subject line “Swoop-and-Poop.”

• Oklahoma State defensive coaches are giving candy bars to top practice performers. I have no objection to this, but it’s the first time I can remember football players being rewarded like puppies remembering to tinkle outside.

• SB Nation contributor (and mgoblog editor) (and SVBFF) Brian Cook breaks down The Week in Schadenfreude.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples offers up his latest college football power rankings. Spare ribs check in at #2, #7, and #14.

• Florida WR Chris Rainey agreed to a misdemeanor plea deal in his aggravated stalking case. It doesn’t seem like Florida fans are too concerned, now that they’ve discovered BURTON-PORN!!!

• A storm was brewing at Kansas State on Saturday. Not in a metaphoric way. Just an actual storm.

• Perhaps wheelchair seating should be moved, uh, away from right on top of the field of play.

• The lines for this week’s games are out. This is a reminded to pay extra special attention to Ty’s picks against the spread. And then run like hell.

Today’s Video of the Day is an instructional video for the New Yorker iPad app, done by Jason Schwartzman. I like his ringtone.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKr-E7J-6pQ

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Bob Dole, who attended the University of Arizona 60 years ago, and probably doesn’t even care that a bunch of no good kids are all wearing red for the Iowa game. Also, he has wang issues.

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• Florida WR/RB Chris Rainey was arrested for aggravated stalking last night in Gainesville. Man, I am THIS close to winning Florida Arrest Bingo -- all I need is Deonte Thompson to embezzle funds from a well-to-do heiress or Ahmad Black to be implicated in an international art theft ring, and I’m golden.

• Houston QB Case Keenum is day-to-day as he deals with “concussion-like” symptoms. If he plays this coming Saturday against UCLA, he’ll immediately be faced with a “slapfight-like defense.”

• A week two Heisman Trophy update, or unofficially, filler.

• There’s a radio show in the south that has a guy who does a Lou Holtz impression. And it’s perfect. (via EDSBS)

• Arizona fans plan to red-out Arizona Stadium Saturday for the WIldcats’ game against Iowa. In response, Nebraska fans have decided to red-out Memorial Stadium like 80 years ago.

Columnist Quick Hits:

• ESPN’s Mark Schlabach comments on the superb talents of Denard Robinson. He even gushes that he’d be a top five scout team gunner in the SEC. Because the SEC roolz for realz, guys.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde thinks the key to Ohio State may just be Terrelle Pryor. Right when you think you have Pat Forde pinned down, he goes and shocks the world. Maverick.

• SI’s Stewart Mandel covers pretty much everything in College Football Overtime, including some appropriate Marcus Lattimore gushing. Like everyone else, I’ve been impressed by Lattimore, but let him play in the Mountain West against some real competition, and we’ll see how good he really is.

• SI’s Andy Staples has good things to say about Trent Richardson and his performance against Penn State. When these two disappear and are found to have run off to a Mediterranean villa together, don’t say you didn’t see the warning signs.

Today’s Video of the Day is a parrot humping a fully-grown male human. Just because.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9T1vfsHYiKY

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ole Miss, the school that maybe (kind of) gave The Solid Verbal’s favorite rebel a shot to be their mascot. Even though things aren’t looking so good (right now) for the admiral, remember, it could always just be a trap.

*****

• Boise State beat Virginia Tech in DC. Which apparently, in college football logic, is reason enough to focus on why they’re not good and not deserving of anything substantial. **Yawn**

• Say what you will, but I liked the uniforms last night, most notable, Virginia Tech‘s helmets. The matte black was filthy. In a good way.

• Reggie Bush will be stripped of his Heisman. Whatever, that Impala was totally worth it – did you see those rims? SICK!

• Maryland beat Navy 17-14 in Baltimore yesterday, with the play of the game being Maryland LB Adrian Moten’s leaping over the offensive line to cause a Ricky Dobbs fumble. It was done in a way that’s been called, “Something average atheletes would never even think about doing themselves ever.”

• Cincinnati WR and former USC transfer Vidal “VH7″ Hazelton tore his ACL during the Bearcats’ game at Fresno State. Fortunately, given the horrible injury, he will be able to apply for a medical redshirt since it happened so early in the season. Also, I have opposite starting WR Armon Binns in the Solid Verbal fantasy league, so I’m sure he’s at least pumped about that.

• As mentioned above, Admiral Ackbar, for all intents and purposes, has been put to rest as an Ole Miss mascot possibility via an excellent ESPN commercial.

• Alabama and DE Marcel Dareus will not appeal the NCAA’s two-game suspension ruling. Don’t worry, Robert Bolden, it’ll just be some other future ineligible defensive lineman who turns your ribcage into Cream of Nittany.

• CNBC’s Darren Rovell reports on the replica jerseys being printed by schools, and which active players happen to have the same numbers as the ones that happen to be for sale. Also, Florida is still printing Tim Tebow, er #15 jerseys, though there is no longer a #15 on the team.

• ESPN’s Erin Andrews is thrilled to be hosting the first hour of College Football Gameday (Saturdays, ESPNU, 9 AM ET), or as it’s called on the west coast, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ/Pillow Drool/Stagger to Pee time. I’m sure she does a fine job with the SEC/Big 10/Big 12 news and features, it just doesn’t seem fair that, out here, we get this guy.

Today’s Video of the Day is of comedian (and reportedly new SNL cast member) Jay Pharoah doing a dead-on Denzel Washington and Will Smith. I can’t imagine that these two impressions will make SNL funny, but it’s certainly more entertaining than the status quo.

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan welcome in Chris Huston from HeismanPundit.com to talk about his 10 Heismandments, the politics behind the award, why Sam Bradford won’t repeat, and Tim Tebow overload.  Plus, news about Boise State’s new uniforms, Tebow’s floor seats, Houston Nutt’s bizarre Twitter post, and the June 9th release of Phil Steele’s 2009 College Football Preview!

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