Ty and Dan talk with ESPN’s Scott Van Pelt about the BCS rematch between LSU and Alabama, questionable coaching hires, conference realignment, Maryland’s uniforms, Tyrann Mathieu’s silver suit, and blocking kicks in NCAA ’12.

Ty and Dan talk with Dan Wetzel from Yahoo! Sports about BCS doomsday scenarios, Fiesta Bowl debauchery, Bill Hancock, Andrew Luck, and the Fake Dan Beebe.

Ty and Dan rehash college football’s eighth week and discuss Kirk Cousins’ Hail Mary, James Franklin’s casual dress Saturday, Clemson’s chances of going unbeaten, and Nick Foles… in a winning effort!

Ty and Dan talk with Spencer Hall about Will Muschamp’s early marks, LSU-Alabama, the Big Ten, “We” Bombs, and a college football version of The Truman Show.  Plus, picks for all the big action during Week Eight.

Ty and Dan review an underwhelming slate of Week 6 action, discuss Urban Meyer rumors, rank the ACC, and analyze Texas A&M’s attempts to simultaneously win AND lose each football game.  Plus, your Reverbs and another round of “Nick Foles In A Losing Effort.”

Ty and Dan rifle through all the Week 5 action and examine their lingering trust issues with Ohio State, Clemson, and Texas.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Oregon attendee and Always Sunny in Philadelphia star Kaitlin Olson. Welcome back to teevee, horrible people.

*****

• LSU squashed Mississippi State under their thumb last night. Not pretty.

• Minnesota coach Jerry Kill is out of the hospital and ready for action (maybe).

• ESPN’s David Ubben talks Iowa State and upward trending.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett chats with Michigan State QB Kirk Cousins ahead of tomorrow’s Notre Dame game.

• Oklahoma‘s regents are meeting on Monday. This passes for news, apparently.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson previews tonight’s Boise State-Toledo matchup.

• Cal coach Jeff Tedford was reprimanded for speaking poorly of officials.

• SI.com’s Jordan Conn profiles FIU’s T.Y. Hilton. T.Y. Hildenbrandt is very excited.

• The Wiz has a prognostication wrap of writers from across the country.

• Maryland‘s down two receivers for the West Virginia game.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features The Dude and some sweet, sweet soul.

Enjoy your Friday.

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Ty and Dan roll through the news of the week, Verballer voice and e-mail messages, their picks for Week 3, and present the best Jesse Palmer impression of all-time, courtesy of West Coast Kevin.  Editor’s note: Look for a special Oklahoma-Florida State preview show tomorrow.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Scarlett Johansson, who, besides being everywhere on the Internet today, should just be here every once in awhile to restore Chorus order.

****

• The Columbus Dispatch has new details regarding Ohio State booster tomfoolery.

• CBS’s Brett McMurphy has new coach report cards atop bowl projections and Heisman voting. All free.

• Georgia RB Isaiah Crowell is officially your starting Bulldog back.

• Oklahoma‘s looking west. Hey, if you’re going to be a part of ruining college football, might as well get some occasional Santa Monica hotel rooms out of it, too.

• Oregon State QB Sean Mannion is your new starting Beaver QB. I’ll update you if this ever matters again.

• Boise State gets sanctioned up. Welcome to the medium time, fellas.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly has a new Numerical column. It’s mostly a bummer, but in the fact-iest kind of way.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples has moving picture power rankings.

• Notre Dame TE Mike Ragone is out for the year with an ACL issue.

• Every awesome spinny ESPNU logo. You know you like it.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is dogs at 1000 frames/second. This is happening, people.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJAme5ThFIw

Enjoy your Wednesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Christine Taylor, Allentown PA native. She’s also, by my count, the only person to ever appear in “Hey Dude,” “Zoolander,” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” Amazing.

*****

• Texas A&M is going to the SEC, just as long as the Big 12 doesn’t get too lawsuit-happy (which they probably are).

• The HATERZ still doubt Boise State, says CBS’s Dennis Dodd.

• Tommy Rees is officially your new starting Notre Dame QB.

• Starting Oklahoma State S Johnny Thomas is ineligible for the 2011 season.

• Four suspended Ohio State players are back. FINALLY.

• Florida didn’t show much against Florida Atlantic. Well, yeah.

• ESPN’s Edward Aschoff says Mississippi State can’t get too excited about Auburn’s run D. Ok, it can get a little excited.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett has a B1G stock report. He’s quite impressed by what Penn State did against Indiana State. Somebody has to be.

• Texas has young RBs who may or may not get stonewalled by older men on Saturday vs BYU.

• The Marshall Lobbestael era (six or so weeks worth) begins (again) for Washington State. Woo.

• Georgia‘s probably in on the spread offense.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples compares college football teams to TV shows. Or something, I’m lost.

• The Wiz has the best screengrabs of the week. This is quietly one of my favorite things about college football every year.

• USC RB Marc Tyler is back and he now has a shiny new merit badge for silence.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter and family are probably unhappy with Lane Kiffin.

• Oklahoma RB Jonathan MIller is done with Norman. Done.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Louis CK talking about George Carlin. Kind of perfect.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=R37zkizucPU

Enjoy your Wednesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan lick their wounds after Notre Dame and Oregon suffer losses, but power through a full hour and recap all the significant Week One action.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Oregon alumnus and sometime entrepreneur Phil Knight. Felt right.

*****

• Mississippi State rolled Memphis. Pretty numbers can be found next to the names of Bulldog QB Chris Relf and RB Vic Ballard.

• Wisconsin QB Russell Wilson and the Badgers had a fun Thursday night in Madison.

• CBS’s (!) Bruce Feldman has weekend picks. He began by missing the exact Wisconsin score by two points. Good start.

• USC secondary coach WIllie Mack Garza resigned. “NCAA probe” and “Willie Lyles” are two names that a report mentioned. Oops.

• Kentucky played Western Kentucky. Let’s just forget it ever happened.

• Syracuse‘s path to the national championship just got a little clearer.

• EDSBS’s Spencer Hall wrote this yesterday. SB Nation’s Spencer Hall wrote this. Not fair.

• ESPN‘s bloggers debate international free trade trends. Just kidding, it’s just Boise St -- Georgia.

• Connor Shaw will (maybe?) start at QB for South Carolina against ECU tomorrow. This can only end well, right?

• Ohio State is getting their suspension on. Feels like old times.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples talks to LSU coach Les Miles in moving pictures.

• Northwestern QB Dan Persa is listed as “questionable” for tomorrow’s game at Boston College.

• Alabama‘s going with two QBs tomorrow. Fancy.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features a slingshot slip ‘n slide that launches people into a lake. I’m in.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=ShFAeNdiEiA

Enjoy your Friday. AND COLLEGE FOOTBALL SATURDAY!

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan kick off their fourth season as hosts of The Solid Verbal by reviewing the news of the week, reading a handful of Verballer messages, and previewing the biggest games of 2011′s opening weekend.

Ty and Dan are joined by Brian Murphy from The Idaho Statesman and Kyle King from DawgSports.com to break down Boise State-Georgia from every possible angle.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Minka Kelly. Gentlemen, start your engines.

*****

• Arrest warrants for second degree battery (felony) have been issued for QB Jordan Jefferson and LB Josh Johns. Not good.

• Eight Miami players are currently ineligible, including QB Jacory Harris. Time to grease some NCAA wheels, Hurricane boosters.

• LSU WR Russell Shepard has been suspended indefinitely for a “compliance” issue surrounding the NCAA‘s investigation of Will Lyles.

• SMU says it’s ready for some Big 12 football. Cute.

• Pac-12 players talk about ASU LB Vontaze Burfict. They’re all wisely very careful with their words.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson profiles the San Diego State backfield.

• Chip Kelly and Les Miles filmed (separate) ESPN Gameday commercials. I give the acting nod to Kelly here.

• Oregon and Boise State have new NIke Pro Combat uniforms. And they’re weird and great.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel falls in love with five unranked teams.

• Another Arizona defender is out for the year, this time it’s CB Jonathan McKnight. Brutal.

• JoePa is a Skyping machine. I’m told the kids LOVE the Skype.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is OK Go covering the Muppets theme song.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=oiMZa8flyYY

Enjoy your Friday. (And one more Saturday without football)

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan fly solo and preview 10 non-automatic qualifiers (Boise State, TCU, Air Force, San Diego State, UCF, Houston, Tulsa, SMU, Florida International, and BYU).

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Maryland grad Larry David. Curb was fantastic Sunday and now the Terps get new gear. It’s always good to be LD.

*****

• The LSU players involved in last week’s Baton Rouge bar fight could face felony battery charges.

• The number of Miami players with eligibility issues going into the opener sits around 15. This seems worrisome.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd talks TCU and CBS’s Jerry Hinnen previews the entire Mountain West. Tag Team back again.

• Seth Doege is officially Texas Tech’s starting QB. Not a surprise.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett speaks with Michigan QB Denard Robinson.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg has Wisconsin depth chart notes. (Theres a “1″ next to Russell Wilson‘s name)

• A list of SEC newcomers to file away. Also, SEC scrimmage notes exist.

• Notes from the last Boise State scrimmage can be read.

• Fox’s Gus Johnson visits Tempe (in a private jet) to visit ASU. Let’s all pretend like he isn’t wearing a shirt with his own catchphrase on it, ok?

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly gets his Norman on.

• Whatever, I like the new Maryland helmets.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel picks Dana Holgorsen’s brain. I like.

• SI.com hired EDSBS and SB Nation’s Holly Anderson. She immediately does work re: LSU.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is outtakes from the Food Network’s Sandra Lee. HOMEMADE.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=x-VNg9y4pB4

Enjoy your Tuesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by noted boat captain and laddy mag officer Hugh Hefner. He also is quite familiar with what Oskee Wow Wow means. I-L-L.

*****

• Four LSU players (including QB Jordan Jefferson) will be questioned soon about their alleged involvement in a bar fight. Well played, LSU, never let Oregon and the Pac-12 one-up the SEC with anything.

• NC State DT J.R. Sweezy is out six weeks after breaking his foot. Shame, he’s the captain of the All Real-Name-Sounds-Like-A-Nickname team.

• CBS’s Eric Sorenson has schedule grades. Kudos for the “F-” addition.

• Oregon RB Lache Seastrunk, a once-touted prospect and current central person in the ongoing Will Lyles saga, has decided to transfer, possibly to Baylor. Worth it!

• Nebraska‘s studying up for the B1G.

• ESPN‘s conference bloggers have bowl projections, just in case it had been too long without reading the words “Meineke Car Care” on a sports site.

• Notre Dame will name a starting QB tomorrow. The lathering sound you hear is coming from Eastern PA.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews Alabama, proving he’ll preview any team, no matter how small or well-dressed they may be.

• Georgia has new uniforms for Week 1′s Boise State game.

• Is there a Taiwanese animation to accompany the Miami-Nevin Shapiro story? You tell me.

• SI.com’s Cory McCartney previews the Mountain West. Hoping he didn’t wear blue on blue when he wrote it. Scandal.

• Celebrate former Miami booster Nevin Shapiro with new, comfortable attire!

• Rivals has the top ten flaws in college football. ACTUAL football flaws.

• “Boston College RB” is the new “Spinal Tap drummer.”

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is what you get when you combine a former fighter pilot who is now well into his 70s, a video camera, and a frank talk about boners.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGJ1zTMEupw

Enjoy your Monday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by SUNY-Buffalo graduate and film mogul Harvey Weinstein. A little birdie told me that The Weinstein Company is interested in optioning The Solid Verbal story. That little birdie? Me.

*****

• The NCAA isn’t done with Ohio State. Or are they? No, they’re not.

• Your monthly Texas A&M-to-the-SEC rumor (this time with a double shot of Governor Rick Perry) is now ready for you. Careful, it’s hot.

• Boise State AD Gene Bleymaier is no more in the Treasure Valley. Ok, he’ll still probably be in the area, but somebody new will be occupying his office.

• Missouri DT Sheldon Richardson has finally been cleared to practice for the Tigers, though he may still go to USC. Or not. Or so.

• Cincinnati AD Mike Thomas will accept the same position at Illinois. Things just got a whole lot more orange.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall previewed every SEC game, I’m assuming because he hates sanity.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson has Big East practice reports. Most importantly, cursing and Tweeting is out at Pitt.

• ESPN checks in with second-year coaches.

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno returned to practice with his arm in a sling and his body in a golf cart.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly previews Boise State. Spoiler: The numbers love ‘em.

• South Carolina coach Steve Spurrier doesn’t want his players swearing. He’s the only one allowed.

• Is Cal‘s offense too hard for young players? Sure, that must be it, you all are just too dumb to understand.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a mailbag AND a Dodge Stratus.

• College football and MS Paint (penises) will never, ever get old.

• Dr Saturday‘s SEC Week keeps on keeping on.

• Georgia Tech OT Phil Smith has been suspended for two games for rule breakage.

• Former Nebraska RB Ahman Green will be roaming sidelines for the Big Ten Network this fall. My only connection to this is that I once accidentally walked in on two people (neither of which were Ahman Green) attempting to make babies in the basement of a building he lived in in Omaha. This has nothing to do with anything.

• 2012 Auburn QB commit Zeke Pike is already thrilled to prod Alabama fans on Twitter. This will only end in mutual respect and peaceful thoughts.

• Rivals previews Nebraska, without any of the Ahman Green insight I provided above. Lame.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Paul Rudd’s marketing genius.

Enjoy your Thursday. Enjoy your style.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Michael McKean, the only Carnegie Mellon graduate to also be a member of Spinal Tap. Beat that.

*****

• Florida State coach Jimbo Fisher‘s son is battling a rare blood disorder. Strong wishes from the Click Chorus.

• Arizona State LB Vontaze Burfict blew up a teammate. Quick, everybody act surprised.

• Michigan WR Darryl Stonum has been forced to redshirt this year after a DUI plea. Ty thinks it’s laughable to compare the situation to Michael Floyd‘s, which is true, it appears Michigan may desire a higher standard under Brady Hoke. Apples and golden oranges.

• The Longhorn Network contract is analyzed by Outkick the Coverage’s Clay Travis. Allegedly.

• It’s QB John Brantley‘s turn in Florida. Again.

• Nebraska QB Bubba Starling, who definitely is playing baseball and not football, didn’t practice and isn’t on the roster. So other than that…

• ESPN is all-accessing Florida. Photographs!

• Fox Sports’s Andrew Astleford profiles Missouri QB James Franklin, who may do the unthinkable and finish in the top half of some Big 12 passing categories, eclipsing the immortal standard set my Blaine Gabbert.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly has been saving his West Virginia preview for a special occasion. Or today, either way.

• Boise State has gotten around the Mountain West‘s unfair blue-on-blue ban. Brilliant.

• Michigan St DT Jerel Worthy has immortalized his disdain for the Maize and Blue.

• Wrap up Pac-12 Week with Yahoo!!!!!!’s Dr Saturday.

• Virginia Tech gets the latest Rivals preview treatment. LUNCHPAILS!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the (DECIDEDLY NSFW) trailer for The Sitter.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYvj9J0GLsU

Enjoy your Monday. Clothing is purchasable.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by USC attendee Ron Howard, who had a similar run-in with TMZ to Marc Tyler’s, only his was way more graphic.

*****

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly gave his first extensive comments since Yahoo!‘s most recent Will Lyles story. Not much was said.

• Alabama *officially* has nothing to do with T-Town Menswear, the outfitter that definitely didn’t do anything wrong with current and former Tide players.

• The Mountain West has arbitrarily decided that Boise State can’t wear their all-blues at home. Because really, what you want to do when you lose your biggest team and gain a new signature team, you’d like alienate the new guys as soon as possible.

• Former Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor has a clearer path to the NFL’s Supplemental Draft — the Buckeyes want nothing to do with him.

• Stanford QB Andrew Luck will only play one more year for Stanford, surprising no one.

• UCLA QB Brett Hundley will be out for about a month after tearing meniscus in his right knee. The Bruins is exactly on schedule.

• Florida RB (and noted sprinter) Jeff Demps will play football this fall. Quickly.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd talks to Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops at Big 12 media day about losing. Exciting stuff.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has decided robots are the way to go for college football. It’s all fun and games until the video replay machine kills somebody.

• ESPN has choice quotes and storylines from Big 12 media day (Day 2). Lapel pins wowed the masses.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller is all up in Stanford QB Andrew Luck’s beard. And I don’t blame him.

• Georgia coach Mark Richt talks to ESPN’s Chris Fowler al fresco.

• Clemson QB Tajh Boyd got in an early dig on South Carolina. I like.

• SB Nation’s Bill Connelly loves him some pig sooie.

• I see what you did there, Georgia Tech. Clever.

• Yahoo!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday has a Minnesota preview. It includes a painful MarQueis Gray pun (but is otherwise very good).

(Michigan and Iowa are also ready for knowledge-gaining)

• Rivals has a West Virginia preview. I’m choosing to pronounced probable star WR Ivan McCartney “Ee-vahn,” mostly because I can.

• Tate Forcier is going to San Jose State (this week).

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Baylor QB Robert Griffin not giving a crap. Go to 2:12 mark. (via Dr Sat)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAmEJ6qLN6Y

Enjoy your Wednesday. Drape yourself in fine cloth. 

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by former Ohio State coach Jim Tressel. In the back of my mind, you’re getting the 24-style silent clock countdown treatment. Good night, sweet prince (of alleged corruption).

*****

Ahem…

• Ohio State coach Jim Tressel has officially coached his last game for the Buckeyes after resigning amid pressure from those around him at the university. Interim head coach Luke Fickell keeps the tag, but now with more games tacked on.

• Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor is the subject of an investigation by both Ohio State and the NCAA regarding his ever-expanding car collection and other illegal benefits allegedly received.

• SI’s George Dohrmann conducted an investigation into the scope of the benefits that Ohio State players had come to receive during the Tressel era.

• Ohio State blog Eleven Warriors thoroughly analyzes the above investigation in the expected partisan manner they should have.

• Oh and ESPN analyst Urban Meyer will not pursue any filled jobs for this fall. Good for him.

• Current and former Buckeyes react to the news. Former Buckeye WR Ray Small was particularly poignant.

• ESPN’s Bruce Feldman throws out some replacement ideas.

• Finally, some reactions — Yahoo!!!!!”s Dan Wetzel expects snowballing … Fox Sports’s Bruce Hooley talks about Tressel losing his cred … SI.com’s Andy Staples says it’s all his fault … CBS’s Brett McMurphy wonders how OSU AD Gene Smith is surviving.

• West Virginia OC Dana Holgersen has actually been involved in at least six “alcohol-related incidents” in the past six months. And no, he doesn’t seem like a good guy to party with.

• Remember that random elite DL recruit from Florida who announced for New Mexico last year? He’s done with New Mexico.

• South Carolina QB Stephen Garcia was quietly reinstated by Gamecocks coach Steve Spurrier. Shhhhh.

• Nebraska QB Cody Green is transferring out of Lincoln. Boise State is a name that has surfaced. Ugh, which probably means that he’ll have a good shot into developing into a complete QB. Meh.

• SEC spring meetings begin today. ESPN’s Chris Low has a preview. It’s like rock and roll but the exact opposite.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is straightforward and to the point — May Failures (I refuse to use the word “fail” as a noun).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrO-qVywKD0

Enjoy your Tuesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by late West Virginia alumnus Don Knotts, who despite his allegiance to the Mountaineers, would’ve probably sided with Johnny Law re: Dana Holgorsen.

*****

• West Virginia OC Dana Holgorsen was allegedly escorted from the premises of a casino. Allegedly.

• SEC commissioner Mike Slive is proposing anti-oversigning legislation. I imagine it’s called something like the SabanSpurrierNuttPetrino Addendum. Or something.

• CBS Sports’s Brett McMurphy profiles Pitt coach Todd Graham. Graham celebrated by immediately suspending his backup QB.

• ESPN’s Joe Schad reported that former NC State QB Russell Wilson visited Auburn yesterday. Excuse me, I should have used his full name … Joe Schad According to Sources.

• With the Big 10 weighing options to cover additional “cost of attendance” for student-athletes, EDSBS examines just what that means at different schools.

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly talks about his team’s unique way of naming captains. After reading this, I think I may have been inadvertently named a captain of something.

• The Big 12 has dark horses. Or do they?

• Notre Dame WR Michael Floyd may not miss any games after all. Nice ‘n tidy.

• Nomadic QB Tate Forcier either wants to be closer to home or doesn’t. That about covers it.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall has some thoughts about South Carolina being favored to win the SEC East. He feels cautiously nauseated.

• Noted horrible person Senator Jon Kyl won’t be returning the contribution he received from the Fiesta Bowl.

• Boise State‘s secret? Holland pipeline, duh.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for the new season of Curb Your Enthusiasm. I can’t argue with any of what Marty Funkhauser says.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=w8iW4vr1EaU

Enjoy your Wednesday.

***Follow me on Twitter.***

Ty and Dan talk with Chris Brown from SmartFootball.com about turnover among offensive assistants in college football and the impact new philosophies will have on their respective teams.

Ty and Dan delve into 10 non-AQ teams and preview an underrated and surprisingly deep group of teams outside the six major conferences.

Ty and Dan take a look around the national college football scene with SI.com’s Stewart Mandel.  What will come of the federal inquiry into the BCS?  What happens to Jim Tressel in the wake of turmoil in Columbus?  Who is the better pick in the Mountain West, Boise State or TCU?  All that and much more, plus Verballer voice messages, and an awkward conversation about Michael Bay making, well, a different kind of movie.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by high school graduate and folk legend James Taylor. He’s had countless hits, a career that’s spanned decades, and most importantly, he kind of looks like Pac-12 commissioner Larry Scott. At times this week, I’ve secretly wanted Larry Scott to break down into an acoustic “Sweet Baby James” during conference media announcements, but perhaps I’ve said too much.

*****

• All of the particulars of the Pac-12′s new media deal have now been released. ESPN and Fox will pay a combined $250 million/year for the right to broadcast football and basketball games, with a yet-to-be-determined Pac-12 proprietary network (TV and digital) showing everything else. Everybody appears excited, but I’ll hold off until I see a schedule and Fox Sports production value, thanks.

• Boise State self-imposed sanctions over violations that would make your head tilt slightly askew. The sanctions include three fewer football practices and three fewer scholarships. They really hit themselves where it slightly pricks for a second or two.

• Former NC St QB Russell Wilson is a free agent. Where should he go? I think we all know the answer — Lehigh. Next question.

• Who’s going to throw for 3k yards in the B1G Ten? Pretty much everyone other than Taylor Martinez, that’s who.

• ESPN’s Mark Schlabach has a post-spring Top 25. Florida State is #3 so you KNOW he knows what he’s doing. Or something.

• Washington State QB Jeff Tuel is out for blood. I like Jeff Tuel.

• Fox Sports Southwest runs down the new Big Twen coordinators. And as always, because it’s Fox, there are pictures of girls.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Uma Thurman + ginger ale. And it’s really odd.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Tc7ZB4ywUI

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Columbia alum Art Garfunkel. Why? Just look at him. He’s Art Garfunkel, damnit.

*****

• Ohio State AD Gene Smith talks about his “nightmare” situation with Jim Tressel.

• CBS’s Tony Barnhart has ten burning SEC questions. If the burning continues tomorrow morning for Mr. Barnhart, I recommend a trip to a physician for antibiotics and a stern talking-to about life decisions.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel isn’t thinking happy thoughts about Auburn‘s immediate future. HATERZ!!

• Former Alabama RB Mark Ingram is your NCAA 12 cover model, beating out Auburn’s Nick Fairley and two overvalued NFL Draft prospects.

• Iowa State coach Paul Rhoads punches a moose. AC-TING!!

• If you guessed “deer antler” as the source of a secret supplement that Auburn players used last year to supposedly heal faster, you have chosen wisely.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson visited TCU and has some double dashes to report.

• She also got some voice time with Boise State coach Chris Petersen. The usual topics were broached.

• Iowa State doesn’t quite seem to have a QB yet. Here’s to hoping I don’t have to copy/paste that in early October.

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg visits Wisconsin and spends most of his space explaining why the Badgers can’t really complete a pass yet.

• Fox Sports’s Lisa Horne profiles incoming UCLA freshman QB Brett Hundley. Apparently, he has a magnificent smile.

• Don’t drop USC QB Matt Barkley‘s passes or run the wrong route. Just… don’t.

• Northwestern QB Dan Persa‘s achilles is coming along nicely. You know, for an achilles that completely exploded.

• New San Diego State coach Rocky Long isn’t a fan of Boise State’s blue turf. Boohoo.

• South Carolina hearts Phil Collins.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is proof that, even if you don’t like the Foo Fighters, a giant band playing in a random guy’s garage is always cool.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWciVk_-5eo

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by College of Saint Rose alum Jimmy Fallon, who does funnier things than I thought he would, though I’m still not entirely sure how funny he is. That made no sense.

*****

• Ohio State‘s student paper thinks Jim Tressel should be terminated. I’m guessing their credentials may just go missing this fall.

• Rivals previews Colorado’s entry into a new conference. It’s basically, “Well they have RB Rodney Stewart, so there’s that.”

• New Maryland coach Randy Edsall is disappointed with his players’ grades. It’s March, whatever.

• Boise State blog One Bronco Nation Under God has an initial spring practice report. No report on Oklahoma ooh-ing and ahh-ing.

• SI.com uses Friend of the Verbal (FotV) George Schroeder to preview the Pac-12. Fellow FotV Andy Staples is on video with FotV Stewart Mandel and looks like he’s always holding an imaginary brisket when he speaks. Not that I’m any better, I just notice these things.

• After the Big 12 stepped in and bought 10,000 unsold Fiesta Bowl tickets, Oklahoma‘s in the black to the tune of $9,350. Ca-ching.

• Florida State blog Tomahawk Nation reviews the competitors for the open starting QB job. Behind EJ Manuel, I enjoy Clint Tricket. What? I like saying “Clint Tricket.”

• Mike Leach fans have written the “Fat Little Girlfriends Cookbook.” This is real, people.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for Win Win, which looks like a solid high school wrestling movie. And Beadie Russell/Holly Flax is in it alongside Pig Virus.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nbe33D59euY

Enjoy your Friday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Boston College alum Amy Poehler. She’ll probably never come down from the high associated with this specific achievement.

*****

• The lawyer who tipped off Ohio State coach Jim Tressel to the activities and associations of five of his players has been identified. He seems, well, interesting.

• Florida practices are closed to everyone. Intrigue! Or just inconvenience and undeserved self-importance after a bad year.

• Georgia Tech coach Paul Johnson can get sassy.

• Boise State hosted the Oklahoma coaching staff. “Hey remember when we came back with the hook and… yeah.”

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Charles Robinson isn’t done breaking hearts.

• ESPN’s Chris Low gets all sorts of detailed about Georgia’s spring.

• Oregon State could look relatively different (see: possibly no Rodgerseseses) this fall.

• Easy classes for Stanford athletes will be harder to find after a “courses of interest” list has been discontinued. Poor, poor Stanford kids.

• Things on offense may get a bit “simpler” at Nebraska.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel got off easy when he received his Big 12 preview assignment and saw that he only had to look at ten questions.

• Yahoo!!!!!’s Dr. Saturday issues a first glance at Nevada going forward. And then a second, third, and fourth. He’s thorough.

• Rivals’s Tom Dienhart examines LSU. SPOILER: Everything looks pretty good except for the most important position.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall advises the NCAA on how to govern social media. Sex, drugs, and Satan are all in there.

• SB Nation has a new stat-minded football blog. Huzzah!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a 1982 Advertiser Promotion Tape from MTV. Radical.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rlQntJI8UPE

Enjoy your Thursday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Washington graduate Anna Faris. She’s attractive, in a new movie that seems like it could be good, and is married to Andy Dwyer. Good enough for me.

*****

• Iowa released a statement reacting to Sports Illustrated’s story regarding the criminal histories of college football players. In conclusion, some Iowa players got drunk before they turned 21.

• Boise State did the same and noted that of the 16 reported offenses, “three have been dismissed, six were traffic related, five were alcohol related, one was for trespassing and one was for battery.” So it looks like the Broncos will press on in lieu of the horrors SI is reporting.

• Additionally, SI‘s story singled out Pitt as a program with players responsible for a number of crimes. And then the story of Pitt OL Fernando Diaz getting tased four times as he resisted arrest came out. Oops.

• After offseason review and the hiring of former NFL VP of Officiating Mike Pereira as a consultant, the Pac-12 has rid itself of 11 referees. Exciting.

• Arizona WR Bug Wright is no longer part of the team. He looked to be a crucial member of a squad expected to be ranked early and then fade late in 2011.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller wraps up the  Pac-12‘s performance at the NFL Scouting Combine. It’s mostly about large people.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett quickly profiles second year Louisville coach Charlie Strong. Lou-uh-vull.

• UConn is down some cash after winning the Big East and failing to convince its fans that the Fiesta Bowl is worth the hassle. Pretty airtight logic.

• A Cecil Newton audio recording has been released, though the term “audio” is open to interpretation.

• New NCAA president Mark Emmert is open to a playoff. This means nothing.

• Did Iowa‘s rhabdo outbreak scare off five-star OT Cyrus Kouandjio from signing with the Hawkeyes? No, it’d be the whole “living in Iowa” thing that did that.

• The new ESPN/Texas network has hired production executives. Adjust your day accordingly.

• Purdue has a new Nike uniform that looks a lot like a Purdue uniform.

• Want to know where Nebraska DE Cameron Meredith stands politically? Wonder no more.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a gut being hit by a pellets from an airsoft gun at 1280 frames per second. It’s transfixing.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=OJWQC9AFAr0

Enjoy your Thursday.

Follow me on Twitter.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Sterling Mallory Archer. I know not of his formal education, I just know that he gave me the line “…like the Pelé of anal” and that’s more than enough.

*****
• An arrest was made after it was confirmed that somebody had poisoned the soil at Toomer’s Corner, the historic section of oak trees on Auburn‘s campus. Harvey Updyke, an Alabama fan who confirmed his responsibility on the Paul Finebaum Show, was arrested yesterday and held on a charge of criminal mischief.

Leaving voicemails for an Auburn turfgrass management professor’s also didn’t help Updyke’s cause.

SI’s Andy Staples explains why all college football fans should be concerned.

Here’s a candid shot.

• CBS’s Dennis Dodd looks at 25 things to watch this spring. I didn’t see NBC’s “Perfect Couples” listed anywhere here.

• Mark Cuban created an LLC to back up his plans to present an alternative to the current college football postseason. And now Oxford is involved, as in England Oxford.

• North Carolina fullback Devon Ramsay will be eligible to play in 2011 after playing only four games in 2010 before being suspended by the NCAA. Oh, and it appears he didn’t do anything wrong. Oops.

• ESPN’s bloggers have spring previews. I suspect the B1G Ten’s Adam Rittenberg may be getting paid by the bullet point.

B1G Ten — Legends and Leaders divisions.

Pac-12 — North and South divisions.

• The Big 12′s David Ubben looks at the conference’s QB situations.

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett speaks with West Virginia coach-in-waiting Dana Holgersen. You want goofy offensive coordinator smiles? Oh I GOT goofy smiles.

• Former Rutgers QB Tom Savage will now be known as current Arizona QB Tom Savage. A special note for Mr. Savage: The guy with the steaming face is your coach.

• Illinois’s Ron Zook and Boise State’s Chris Petersen now have something in common — they both got raises yesterday. This is the end of their venn diagram.

• Oregon RB Dontae Williams is opting to transfer. Williams redshirted in 2010. Worry not, Duck fans, the backfield goes about five-deep at the moment. Such problems…

• The NCAA isn’t just investigating Cam Newton‘s Auburn recruitment, but also the recruitment of OL Greg Robinson and WR Travon Reed, both of Thibodaux, LA. Tick tock…

• SB Nation’s Ted Glover speaks with new Minnesota coach Jerry Kill. KILLLLLL!!!!

• 247 Sports/SI.com has handpicked the first 5-star recruits of the 2012 class. It includes an “Andrus,” a “Dorial,” and a “Gunner.” NICE.

• Arizona State‘s first “Sparky” is a pretty excellent human being.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for “Arthur.” Katy Perry’s husband is involved.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtTVquZ2TFk

Enjoy your Friday.

Ty and Dan talk with Brian Murphy from The Idaho Statesman about Boise State’s “Cinderella” card, Chris Petersen’s dream job, the impact of facilities, and the 2011 season.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Pawnee, Indiana’s Ron Swanson. Back tonight! Which reminds me, I need breakfast.

*****

• Michigan QB Tate Forcier announced his transfer via Twitter, 140 characters at a time. And the release still isn’t nearly as entertaining as his brother’s transfer from UCLA. FACT.

• Wisconsin may lose their offensive coordinator Paul Chryst to Jim Harbaugh and the 49ers. This is now slow inching towards giant white offensive lineman porn.

• This year’s TCU-Boise State game may get moved from Fort Worth to Boise. Just because screw you TCU, that’s why.

• Yahoo!!!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart confirmed that former Louisville coach Steve Kragthorpe will take over as LSU’s offensive coordinator.

• A Mississippi State cheerleader appeared in Playboy and has now spoken about it with SB Nation. It’s all very exciting.

• QB Zach Mettenberger went to Georgia. Then he transferred. Now he’s going to LSU. And he looks like this.

• It’s the offseason, a perfect time for a refresher on EDSBS‘s Fulmer Cup rules and regulations.

• Texas Tech needed to drop one non-conference game to make room for a ninth Big 12 game, and, I hope you’re sitting down for this, they dropped a road game at TCU.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel spoke with Mike Leach and explains why Leach’s baggage (as long as it exists) will stand in the way of future employment.

• The Oregon cheerleaders shot a calendar. The Wiz has video.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Aziz Ansari’s version of the Parks and Recreation intro. I like this show.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Kelly Kapowski. Why? Because Chip Kelly is your AP Coach of the Year and his name has Kelly in it. Shouldn’t even have to explain these anymore.

*****

• Louisville edged Southern Miss in last night’s Beef ‘O’ Brady’s St. Petersburg Bowl. See? Dance-brawls DO matter!

• The Cardinals may have been able to ultimately stop Southern Miss, but they didn’t stop this ridiculous catch by QB Austin Davis. Yes, QB.

The band was unimpressed.

• Utah WR Devonte Christopher flipped the script and called Boise State “Girlse State.” I see what you did there!

• Let’s be serious — here’s what to look for and here are some keys for tonight’s Las Vegas Bowl matchup of Girlse State and Utah. Comedy after all!!

• LSU RB Stevan Ridley was ruled academically ineligible to play in the Cotton Bowl. Advanced Biomedical Engineering is a BITCH.

• Tennessee coach Derek Dooley is still getting a handle on Facebook. Accidentally poking every SEC coach is no way to make friends.

• Puppets sing/rap about Notre Dame. Slow news day? Why do you ask? (via edsbs)

• Assistant coaches who perform well are making good money. Also, assistant coaches at Texas are making good money.

• Oregon’s Chip Kelly is the AP Coach of the Year. Clearly emotionally overwhelmed, Kelly issued a touching statement of, “So?”

• Nobody really wants to travel to mediocre bowl games (redundant, I know).

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno turned 84 yesterday. What? WHAT? WHATTTTT?????

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a song from The Lonely Island and Akon. They say “penis” a lot and Blake Lively is there. Woo.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQlIhraqL7o

Enjoy your Wednesday + Las Vegas Bowl.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Mila Kunis. The Hawaii bowl is this week, so this picture seems appropriate. It appears that she briefly attended UCLA, but she’s mainly here because, well, she’s Mila Kunis.

*****

• At this point isn’t it more of story when the teams going to the Las Vegas Bowl don’t brawl?

• Notre Dame QB Dayne Crist “isn’t going anywhere.” Of course not, he has the knees of an 86 year old.

• BYU coach Bronco Mendenhall wasn’t thrilled with the BYU offense this season, and thus, the offensive coaching staff will soon become the former offensive coaching staff.

• Want to sound moderately informed when somebody asks you about tonight’s Beef ‘O’ Brady’s St. Petersberg Bowl? Really? That’s kind of a weird thing to pride yourself on, but if so, read what ESPN’s Brian Bennett and Andrea Adelson have to say.

• Alabama coach Nick Saban is telling his best juniors to think twice about the NFL Draft. There he goes again, that Saban, looking out for the best interest of others without a single speck of selfishness to be found.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde lays out his bowl picks, making it quite simple to win a lot of money by going against his blind stabs supported with limited useful reason.

• Yahoo!!!!!! lists their top 10 college football stories of the year. Les Miles‘s name doesn’t appear once, proving that this list is completely fraudulent.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is Conan spending time with Hunter S. Thompson on Conan’s old show. It’s as good as you think it is.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=FNEImAIM4L4

Enjoy your Tuesday Beef ‘O’ Brady’s.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly, who I saw on a Texas sideline once (but didn’t take this picture). Mack Brown has since blamed them for this season’s slide.

*****

• Since we last spoke, everybody has hired a new coach (image via). Ahem:

Florida convinced Texas DC Will Muschamp (and his wristband) to leave the Austin Tire Fire for the Gainesville Tire Fire. EDSBS’s Spencer Hall reacts and makes it about blowfish sushi. Of course he does.

Miami hired Solid Verbal Guest (and Temple coach) Al Golden. He once hosted a training video.

Northern Illinois hired Wisconsin DC Dave Doeren.

Vanderbilt seemed to have hired Auburn OC Gus Malzahn, but he’s apparently not in any sort of need of $3 million. Or something.

• Arkansas essentially re-hired coach Bobby Petrino and made it so only Qatar State can buy him out.

• Auburn QB Cam Newton deservedly won the Heisman Trophy and is a consensus All-American.

Butttttt, the Football Writers Association of America did an independent investigation, proved and confirmed that Newton knew about his father’s solicitation the entire time, and subsequently left him off their Harumph Harumph Almost All-American team. I just can’t find a link of their findings yet. Rest assured, though, I will!!!!!

• Despite what he insisted, Urban Meyer may not be the picture of good health.

• I don’t know if I’m pumped or bummed out by this screengrab of Cam Newton and LaMichael James. James is also not impressed by flying Dumbos.

• Hawaii is officially a Mountain West team. So there’s that.

• The Big Ten, in unveiling its new logo and division names, revealed themselves to be exactly what we mostly thought they were — uh, dorks.

• ESPN’s Pat Forde says Texas coach Mack Brown has an uphill battle this offseason, as he needs to hire two new coordinators. Part of the application has leaked and obviously, if you want one of those jobs, certainly check the box next to, “Comfortable under bus?”

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno can’t hear you. But he can run the day-to-day of and make important decisions instantly for a gigantic football program. Yep.

• Navy beat Army again. You’re probably pumped if you own a peacoat.

• Nike will unveil new bowl uniforms for TCU, Boise State, Florida, and, if you can believe it, Oregon.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is of lightning bolts.

Enjoy your Monday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Dunder Mifflin’s Toby Flenderson, who doesn’t look completely unlike Florida AD Jeremy Foley. Whatever, I didn’t want to give too much effort in choosing a Chorus sponsor today and this fit.

*****

• Urban Meyer stepped down as the coach of Florida yesterday so he can spend more time with his family. And there’s no way he’ll ever coach again or change his mind at a certain point. Unless, of course, he does.

The presumed candidates include names previously associated with both the school and Meyer, big names around football, and my own nominee — James from GatorsFirst.com. Because he puts the Gators FIRST.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall offered an initial reaction.

• ESPN’s Erin Andrews (Gator alumnus) reacts to Meyer’s resignation.

• Utah DE Christian Cox is promising a Ute win over Boise State in the Las Vegas Bowl. I may now watch the game just to see if the senior makes plays and we get to hear a lot of, “So much Cox!!” or “Cox comes up big!!” Ok I’ll stop.

• Ohio State QB Terrelle Pryor said he’d “dominate” if he had chosen to attend a school that, you know, was eager to take advantage of his otherworldly athletic talents.

• The Miami Herald reported that Nebraska granted coach Bo Pelini permission to speak with the Hurricanes about their head coaching vacancy, while Pelini and Nebraska deny everything.

• Speaking of which, Nebraska DT Baker Steinkuhler was cited for suspicion of a DUI and will be put on ice for the Holiday Bowl. See what I did there? I’ve been waiting all year for Baker Steinkuhler to be newsworthy, and frankly, I nailed it.

• Mike Leach will take any of your available jobs.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have all-conference teams. Oklahoma State WR Justin Blackmon was awarded a spot at 7 different offensive positions on the Big 12 list and I’m not sure you’re in any sort of position to question this.

• Iowa WR Derrell Johnson-Koulianos was officially charged with “keeping a drug house.” Some people go to the Hamptons, some to Aspen, and now, I suppose, Iowa City.

• Auburn DT Nick Fairley won the Lombardi Award, the trophy given to the nation’s top lineman. He was gracious in accepting the honor and then drove his helmet into the other nominees.

• BCS Dear Leader Bill Hancock wrote an op-ed piece in today’s USA Today defending the wonderful BCS.

• Former Oregon cheerleader Katelynn Johnson travels for a Fox Sports video segment, and you’re not going to believe this, but they had her play mud football. It’s like a much less sexy “SI Tour Guy.”

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a new mailbag and addresses BCS modifications.

• I’ll be honest — one of the great things about being an Oregon fan in Los Angeles is that I’m far, far away from a lot of Duck fans. This guy included.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is fast food turned into sushi. BACONBACONBACONBACON.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXjxHQQxcLw

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Bill Cosby, who received a gold medal from something called the National Football Foundation for playing briefly for Temple 50 years ago. No word on how upset he may or may not be about the Owls getting jobbed out of a bowl. Jobbed I say!

*****

• Dave Wannstedt and ‘stache are done coaching at Pitt (but both stay on in a non-coaching role within the athletic department). It’s unclear if it’s termination, resignation, or retirement, but he’s done. And so is star WR Jonathan Baldwin, who declared for the NFL Draft. Offensive coordinator Frank Cignetti takes over and, depending on which stats are important to you, has led offenses at both Pitt and Cal to offensive seasons that fall between average and below average.

• Iowa WR Derrell Johnson-Koulianos is a full-on drug enthusiast. Say goodbye to DJK.

• I don’t know Boise State president Bob Kustra, but I like the fact that he’s willing to go the extra mile to start a feud.

• Speaking of which, Boise State OC Bryan Harsin is being looked at to run Texas’s offense. Perfect, now they just need to start recruiting players who care about “effort.”

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall reviews some of the bowl announcer pairings. He compares Matt Millen to an inexperienced oboe player and it made sense at the time.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have final conference overviews. It’s essentially them saying the same things they’ve been saying (a good thing) all season long, but now they just, uh, do it again.

• USC may buy its own stadium. In typical LA Coliseum fashion, news on this has been pretty quiet so far.

• This week’s split-SI cover. I don’t know the actual ramifications of a double-jinx, I just know that somebody owes me Coke (a-Cola, DJK).

• Oregon WR D.J. Davis honored late Notre Dame video operator Declan Sullivan last Friday.

• Rivals has All-American teams. Even though Auburn DT Nick Fairley was awarded first team honors, he still suplexed the majority of the Rivals editorial staff. Just because.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a Ford Fiesta driven by professional driver Ken Block. I’m worried about the integrity of the tires.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TshFWSsrn8

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought you by Maryland alumnus Larry David, who, because I need another season of Curb Your Enthusiasm, needs to avoid any and all scooters.

*****

• Oklahoma State OC Dana Holgersen has not spoken with Urban Meyer about a position at Florida. But he has been have late night IM sessions with whoever “UrbzTeebz4lyfe” is. Totes.

• Nebraska fans are not pleased with OC Shawn Watson. Apparently, an offense that produces yards, first downs, and points against bad teams, but stops doing so good ones agitates people who invest a questionable amount of their emotions into college football. <— I’m one of you.

• Speaking of which, SB Nation’s Brian Cook unearths some rock solid schadenfraude. And hey, there’s Bo Pelini featured prominently!

• The Sports Business Journal has a chart of all the gifts that bowl games give to their participants. The Meineke Car Care Bowl didn’t disclose, so we’ll just assume everyone’s getting jewel-encrusted mufflers.

• CBS Sports’s Adam Jacobi reacts to Indiana hiring Oklahoma OC Kevin Wilson. His analysis is a bit more detailed than my reaction of, “Oh.”

• Miami has candidates in mind for their vacant head coaching job. Super! Congrats! Out of this world!

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall writes a column listing things that caught his attention and they just happen to be in alphabetical order. The name of the column is “The Alphabetical” — wait a second…

• Utah QB Jordan Wynn will miss both the Utes’ bowl game against Boise State and spring practice after having shoulder surgery.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans wasn’t thrilled with the 2010 college football season. Sounds like he needs a year of being reassigned to the NFL to put things in perspective.

• The wacky Lee Corso mascot head has been recovered and two former Oregon students (not graduates, ahem) were cited for felony theft. I’ve always said it — if you’re going down for felony theft, go down doing it stealing an ironically large mascot head of a below-average former coach/charismatic morning show host. Always.

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) reviews the Heisman finalist field. I haven’t been paying attention lately, but I still think Denard Robinson edges out Terrelle Pryor and Taylor Martinez.

• The Football Writers Association of America (FWAA) voted Oregon coach Chip Kelly as their coach of the year, awarding him the Eddie Robinson Coach of the Year award. No big deal.

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Dan Wetzel reveals this year’s seeded 16-team playoff. I have no arguments or qualms of any sort.

• The lines are out for the bowl games. If Chris the Capper doesn’t win our bowl pool, you’ll know he’s a complete fraud. Or a talented handicapper who did extremely well during the regular season and HITS A WALL WHEN IT COUNTS. Your move, Capper.

• New Colorado coach Jon Embree has a staff and a lot of them, well, were already there. That makes it easy — no nametags.

• Former Georgia QB Zach Mettenberger is now an LSU Tiger. Because really, the place to hone the craft of quarterbacking is and will always be Baton Rouge, LA.

• Teddy Bridgewater, the QB jewel of Miami’s 2011 recruiting class, has decommitted from Miami and opened up his recruitment. He’s expected to take visits with his close friend Tommy Tunnelmountain. Nailed it!!

• Scooters are taking out Maryland players one by one. Scary.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a little old, but still great. Law school applicants, please take note.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMvARy0lBLE

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan review a handful of conference championship games and dissect a bunch of projected bowl pairings.

Ty and Dan take a look at the NCAA’s ruling on Cam Newton, TCU’s move to the Big East, E. Gordon Gee’s stupid comments, and the Miami coaching vacancy.  Plus, Verballer voice messages, e-mails and locks of the week.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Anne Hathaway. She’s in a new movie (allegedly nekkid) that got bad reviews, is apparently hosting an awards show that nobody watches anymore (Because she’s funny! Really!), and received a completely fraudulent Vassar education (another school without a football program). Still, she seems attractive.

*****

• The NCAA, if you can believe it, swiftly declared Cam Newton eligible shortly after Auburn declared him ineligible (pending an NCAA decision). In a statement, the NCAA said, “Screw it, he can play!!”

SI.com’s Andy Staples explains how the Cam Newton case has thrown the spotlight on a giant eligibility loophole. Middle men (and women) rejoice!!

Fanhouse’s Clay Travis spoke with SEC commissioner Mike Slive.

Yahoo!!!!!!’s Dan Wetzel chatted with longtime college basketball, uh, power person Sonny Vaccaro about Cam Newton. Vaccaro: “That’s the most amazing thing I’ve heard in over four decades of being around college and high school sports.”

SportsbyBrooks, as always, does a great job of analyzing the revelations.

• In more important news, Utah is going to the MAACO Las Vegas Bowl. The bowl is also apparently shooting for Boise State. A round of cheap car paint for everyone!!

• Colorado interviewed Alabama OC Jim McElwain for its open head coaching job. It may just be enough that he can lead a team to a 24-7 lead.

• BYU‘s going bowling in New Mexico. And they’re happy to do it. Polite arguments over red and green chiles loom.

• Just to be clear, Mike Leach would be perfectly happy accepting the Minnesota job.

• Nike founder Phil Knight is quite pleased with the Oregon football team. Dun dun DUNNNNNNNN!!

• Admissions of jackassery are always welcome here. Today’s edition: Ohio State president Elwood Gordon Gee.

• LSU coach Les Miles isn’t saying much about OC Gary Crowton’s status for next season. Tough when your mouth is full of fresh mower trimmings.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers demand you watch for certain things and predict some outcomes. If you read these items closely, look for one link on one of these pages that links to the filthiest pornography you’ll ever see.

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart looks at whether title games are good, bad, or ugly. You see what I did there? Boosh.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the story of Moe Norman, the greatest golfer I’ve never heard of, as told by a Scottish bartender.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nu6FvJy7deM

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Top Chef host (new season starts tonight) and Clark University alumnus Padma Lakshmi. Clark doesn’t have a football program, but damnit, just look at her.

*****

• Jon Gruden will apparently meet with Miami AD Kirby Hocutt today. I’m still not sure this happens and isn’t just a leverage ploy for an NFL job, but hey, I’m only ALWAYS right*.

*Except when I’m wrong.

• Donald Trump sent Miami president Donna Shalala another note recommending Mike Leach. Also, Mike Leach is recommending Mike Leach.

• Washington State coach Paul Wulff isn’t sure if he’ll be back next season. It’s hard to tell — you know, because of the continued losing — but WSU has actually gotten better and could come close to a bowl next year. This makes me think that thse school is ready to scrap the whole thing and start over.

• Texas A&M has accepted a bid to play in the Cotton Bowl, where, presumably, they’d play Alabama or LSU and Colby Caillet will awkwardly serenade Mike Sherman. To honor the Aggies’ improved 2010 bowl bid, I’m wearing a regular ol’ t-shirt.

• More on USC student-agent Teague Egan (real name!) from The Wiz. Try making it through this without throwing up a little in your mouth. You don’t win a prize, but you do get the satisfaction of knowing a little bit of your soul has been chipped away.

• Nevada lost some dollars by beating Boise State.

• Clemson QB Kyle Parker will play in the Tigers’ bowl game. Not sure what Clemson did to deserve this, but take the information as you will.

• Florida‘s had a bad year. In all of it is proudly edited together here.

• Air Force coach Troy Calhoun isn’t interested in the Colorado job. And if Colorado hires former coach Bill McCartney, it will appear as if the school isn’t interested either.

• Florida State improved because it’s big dudes are good. OL Rodney Hudson is one of those big dudes.

• Illinois QB Nathan Scheelhaase is a redshirt freshman and isn’t completely horrible.

• The All-Mountain West teams are out and they’re … pretty much what you’d expect.

• USC coach Lane Kiffin says QB Matt Barkley will play against UCLA and points out that anonymous Pac-10 coaches are rooting for him against UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel.

• SB Nation’s Jon Bois takes to hating and appreciating kickers.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has bowl projections. I totally called Texas A&M to the Cotton Bowl a few items up!

• If Auburn doesn’t make QB Cam Newton available to the media ahead of the Saturday’s SEC championship, they’ll be fined. So weird to think about Auburn having to pay for Cam Newton. Hm.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day features people getting hurt and humiliated in amusing fashion.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KDg7CiHAPqg

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Clemson alumnus and new Entertainment Tonight host Nancy O’Dell. There’s no way she’s happy about the way Kyle Parker’s season turned out, but she’ll be excited to learn that I saw her a few years ago at an outdoor mall and she was very perdy.

*****

• Boise State kicker Kyle Brotzman is getting harassed by Bronco fans. Good to know people are taking time out of their day to try to make a guy feel worse about something that’s going to haunt him forever. I’m fine with the offenders being forced to watch Chris Peterson sign a gigantic contract with Michigan on a 110″ TV on an endless loop.

Or perhaps I’ve said too much.

(But kudos to these people)

• Nebraska may play two quarterbacks against Oklahoma on Saturday. And if neither of them are a healthy Taylor Martinez, it’s not going to be so good.

• Ahead of Saturday’s SEC championship game, South Carolina QB Stephen Garcia is dinged up to the point that the game can’t currently be wagered on.

• EDSBS’s Doug Gillett grades this week’s championship games in this week’s CFB Buyer’s Guide.

• Could Temple coach Al Golden be the next coach at Vanderbilt? The Tennesseean seems to think that he maybe kinda sorta is being considered.

• Clemson QB Kyle Parker is pretty much dunzo***.

***Copyright: Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County.

• This year’s All-Big Ten teams were announced. Yeah, I know, I spit out my coffee too.

• ESPN’s Ted Miller calmly explains why Stanford is better than you think they are. I happen to agree, but Ted left out the jam-packed stadium and hordes of attractive females. Oh wait.

• Alabama fired the employees responsible for playing “Son of a Preacher Man” and “Take the Money and Run” before the Auburn game (for Cam Newton). The good news, of course, is Alabama has never and will never be caught paying for recruits. Never ever ever.

• Is there a single person responsible for the continued growth and presence of the BCS? Brooks from, you guessed it, SportsbyBrooks says indeed there is.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day ESPN’s Erin Andrews giving you a tour of the Gameday bus. I thought Corso’s sex swings were unnecessary, but hey, you can’t judge. (via Hot Clicks)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NnMGsz9ZU4

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan break down a wild weekend that saw a monster upset by Nevada, a triumphant victory for Auburn, and a defining loss for Rich Rodriguez against Ohio State.  Plus, wackiness in the Big 12, closure in the ACC, and a host of listener Reverbs.

Ty and Dan deliver a super-sized episode, chock full of analysis for all the week’s biggest rivalries, listener e-mails and voice messages.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Billings, MT Mayor Tom Hanel. I needlessly insulted his fine town (below) and am thus making it up to him and his town here. Tom is the one with the mustache.

*****

• Ohio State president E. Gordon Gee doesn’t like Boise State or TCU and doesn’t think there should ever be a system to put them on equal footing, mostly because he thinks their schedules are undeserving. And as SI.com’s Andy Staples notes, Ohio State should be congratulated on their 59th ranked schedule, a whopping NINE spots ahead of Boise’s 68th.

• Former Ohio State LB Chris Spielman is shocked at how bad Michigan’s defense truly is, but likes QB Denard Robinson a lot. I think the combination of these two thoughts works out to a compliment.

• Colorado apparently thinks LSU Coach Les Miles is worth pursuing. Kind of sad when the fake long-shot rumor you’re floating to make yourself sound important involves Les Miles. I take that back — there’s nothing “kind of” about it.

• Nebraska DC Carl Pelini is sorry now, too.

• Who argues and makes a bigger spectacle of himself — Bob or Mike Stoops? The Wall Street Journal took the time to find out. It’s pretty close, but Mike’s facial-redness factor has really taken him to new heights.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers tell us what to watch and make some predictions. Here’s a guarantee: I predict there will be massive intestinally-driven DVR pausing across the country on Friday. Take that as you will.

• Here is this week’s regional ESPN/ABC map, so you can see what games are where. Residents of Billings, Montana — screwed again. The first time of course was simply having to be in BIllings, Montana. Actually, I take that back, it’s probably awesome in Montana. Now I feel bad. Here’s looking at you, Billings!

• GOOD NEWS: Eric LeGrand, the paralyzed Rutgers player, is breathing on his own and is not as paralyzed as he previously had been. Great things.

This news is essentially the opposite of any headline involving E. Gordon Gee.

• Clemson RB Andre Ellington is a game-time decision against South Carolina.

• Former Oregon coach and current ESPN broadcaster Mike Bellotti talks punt-blocking. PASSION!

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno will be back next year. Hey, Lavar Arrington isn’t going to coach himself.

• Georgia QB Aaron Murray says he’s pain-free (knee, sternum) and will be good to go against Georgia Tech Saturday night. The game plan remains unchanged — throw it up to #8.

• Yahoo!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart interviews TCU coach Gary Patterson. Patterson gives his Fort Worth food and bar recommendations. Ok, he doesn’t, but we need them, Verballers. Where you at?

• Auburn DT Nick Fairley plays in a completely fair and just way. Just ask his teammates.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter, fresh off his 4th strike suspension, should be reinstated for the Notre Dame game. Whew.

• USC QB Matt Barkley hasn’t been practicing, but hopes to play against Notre Dame. He’s already started locking onto his receivers a few days ahead of kickoff, so things seem promising.

• The New York Times is all up in Cecil Newton’s church business grill.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is SNL’s Jay Pharoah (not Natalie Portman) on Letterman. I think I’ve already posted a video of him, but good impressions are really hard to do and he’s going STRONG with Eddie Murphy, Denzel Washington, Will Smith, and President Obama.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbQ4CoxiGrY

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by legendary horse trainer and Arizona graduate (Major: Race Track Industry!) Bob Baffert, though I have no idea if he follows college football and has a horse in the race when it comes to Friday’s game at Oregon. You see what I did there? Comedy.

*****

• Nebraska coach Bo Pelini apologized for his behavior and confirmed Taylor Martinez’s continued presence on the Huskers. He reiterated, “NBgHJ RN3GL JDaF K77GN&#*@3&* %&#$@(adf*#@!!”

• An Indiana prosecutor is investigating a sexual assault claim against a Notre Dame football player by a woman who died in early September in an apparent suicide.

• Oregon RB LaMichael James left the Cal game with an apparent leg injury and appeared on crutches in a walking boot post-game. He apparently practiced full-go yesterday and should be fine against Arizona on Friday. Upon hearing the news, Cal DT Aaron Tipoti instinctively fell to the ground.

• Stanford’s Andrew Luck, Boise State’s Kellen Moore, and Auburn’s Cam Newton are your Davey O’Brien Award finalists. All well and good, but who’s up for this year’s Ken O’Brien? Oh, it appears to be only Garrett Gilbert.

• Speaking of which, Wisconsin RB John Clay, despite managing only 42 rushing yards (due to injury) in November, is a Doak Walker Award finalist. CBS Sports’s Adam Jacoby (correctly) takes issue.

• EDSBS’s Doug Gillett prefers to disagree with you regarding the biggest college football rivalries.

• ESPN’s Gameday will be in Stillwater for Saturday’s Bedlam game, forgoing the excellent idea to have Lt. Jim Dangle be the celebrity picker at Boise State/Nevada on Friday.

• The LA Times’ TJ Simers says it’s not looking good for UCLA OC Norm Chow. But Rick Neuheisel is doing a bang-up job!!

• ESPN’s Brian Bennett compares Pitt RB Dion Lewis to West Virginia RB Noel Devine, two backs who have fallen in line with the Big East’s library-quiet presence this season.

• Boston College RB Montel Harris, the Eagles’ one offensive bright spot, could be out 3-6 weeks with torn meniscus. Plug in Kuechly!!

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers rewind and fast forward. Because they’ve done so every week and it’s why they get paid Cecil Newton money.

• Want to see this week’s most famous golf cart? Of course you kind of do! (Impressive upholstery)

• Arizona will be down a receiver (suspension) for Friday’s Oregon game. And so will Oregon (injury). Both rock solid names, though.

• Oregon‘s building a new HQ for its football program. It’s expected to be inexpensive, modest, and devoid of any flash. Ahem.

• SB Nation’s Spencer Hall (SVBFF) goes A through Y, and then just for kicks, goes to Z in this week’s Alphabetical. I enjoyed you best, Yale.

• Similarly, SB Nation’s Brian Cook (SVBFF) tackles some schadenfraude.

• SI.com’s Cory McCartney casts an updated Heisman vote because … actually, I really have no idea why.

• This week’s college football lines. Las Vegans (word?) seem to like the Crimson Tide of Alabama.

• This week’s screengrabs of the week (via The Wiz).

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is almost guaranteed to make you a vegetarian (if yesterday’s didn’t) or some sort of bloodthirsty maniac. It’s essentially every kind of edible animal combined to form a delicious super-meal called TurBaconEpic. With extra bacon.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=7Xc5wIpUenQ

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Brooklyn Decker, the wife of Nebraska fan Andy Roddick. She probably doesn’t have an opinion of angry Pelinis or Texas A&M ball-grabbin’, but she’s, uh, sorry, I lost my train of thought.

*****

• Nebraska coach Bo Pelini was and probably still is steaming mad at everyone involved in Saturday’s loss at Texas A&M. And according to CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd, the guy who has a problem with everyone probably has some problems himself. I swear I came to this same life lesson while watching “The Hills” three years ago. Let’s continue.

• Despite rumors to the contrary, ESPN’s Joe Schad reports Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez is still a Cornhusker. Hard to tell if Bo Pelini is happy about this. And in other news, defensive coordinator Carl Pelini no likey shiny camera.

On top of all of that, their boss isn’t happy with either of them, and TE Ben Cotton got flagged for just wanting his balls back.

• Notre Dame LB Manti Te’o will play against USC this weekend with a busted honker. Until I see otherwise, I’ll just assume he got Marcia Brady’d.

• USC coach Lane Kiffin is “extremely hopeful” that QB Matt Barkley can play against Notre Dame with a high ankle sprain (X-rays showed no bone breaks). And just for kicks, Kiffin joked about how much of a disaster it would be to start some poor walk-on guy. HA, stupid walk-on, working hard and trying to earn a scholarship. LAME!!

• Former Oregon coach and current ESPN broadcaster Mike Bellotti withdrew his name from the Colorado coaching search. And in no way is it about the money or them looking in a different direction and him saving face. Couldn’t possibly be either of those two completely true reasons.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers issue some conference race updates, bowl projections, and power rankings. And then they break down last night’s AMAs. Not a surprise — Big East blogger Brian Bennett is NOT happy with Ke$ha.

• UCLA QB Richard Brehaut should be able to practice today after suffering from concussion-like symptoms during last Thursday’s Washington game. Because really, the right thing to do would be to rush a scrambled brain back to the field for your meaningless final games. Bra-Vo.

• In case you missed it, Illinois RB Mikel LeShoure went for 300 against Northwestern at Wrigley Field. And folks, Dan Persa doesn’t play defense.

• Stanford QB Andrew Luck wants no part of your tackling efforts. Muahahaha.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel peers over the TCU/Boise State fence in his newest College Football Overtime column and looks at the other teams that are in line to the ol’ BCS screwjob. Essentially it’s one long implied middle finger at the Big East.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter was ruled ineligible by USC after riding around in a golf cart with an agent that USC had already told not to give rides to players. And now, there definitely isn’t a group of pictures of other USC players at a party thrown by that agent. Definitely not.

• EDSBS’s Holly Anderson (Peete) gives out stickers because stickers are cool. Everyone knows that.

• Oregon State fans are camping out to buy Civil War tickets. It’s hard to tell how bothersome the 28,782 fans (that show up) really can get for a big game, but I’d guess if they filled the stadium to its 45,000+ capacity, it’ll at least be a touch inconvenient for a spell.

• Yahoo!!!!!!!!’s Tom Dienhart gives out Week 12 awards. Right now, Dienhart gets my award for best Week 12 awards column. So meta.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a Thanksgiving alternative that absolutely nobody should ever try. Or everyone. I keep going back and forth.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=eIzzx2OolfI

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan talk about LSU’s close call, Nebraska’s dud, a potential Wisconsin-Stanford Rose Bowl, and the ongoing Dillon Baxter Experiment at USC.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by former Georgia State student Julia Roberts. Alabama may have the money, championships, tradition, and name recognition, but they don’t have the star of “Eat Pray Love.” Take that, Tide. Take that.

*****

• UCLA lost at Washington last night in a rather unimpressive showing. UCLA fans, much like Sammi Sweetheart, are DONE.

• Alabama mercilessly tickled first-year team Georgia State last night. Good for you, Alabama, finally standing up for the big guy.

• Due to safety issues, only one end zone will be used during Saturday’s Northwestern/Illinois tilt. This only adds to the rumors of an all-time QB and six-Mississippi count being instituted for the game. Here are similar jokes.

• Hawaii is probably becoming a Mountain West football school and joining something called the Big West in other sports. This appears to be the final nail in WAC Commissioner Karl Benson‘s “2010 Sportsman of the Year” coffin.

• Florida coach Urban Meyer will be back in 2011. Apparently this is an actual story. Also an actual story — Appalachian State runs Urban Meyer’s offense … and plays Urban Meyer this weekend.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter was hospitalized for an “unspecified illness and dehydration.” We hope he has a speedy recovery from whatever it is that’s NEVER dehydration.

• Maryland coach Ralph Friedgen will be back next season coaching the Terps. I’ll file this under “Interesting CFB Story that isn’t Cam Newton/BCS,” as that’s where everyone else seems to be filing things.

• Boise State play Georgia at the Georgia Dome to open the 2011 season. Since it seems so far away, the only real effect this has is to remind me that there’s no Chick fil-A nearby. Thanks a lot, guys.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers select their conference’s best rivalry of the decade. Not a surprise to be found here.

• The Oregonian’s Ken Goe says Mike Bellotti can do a lot better than Colorado. Snap.

• Purdue DE Ryan Kerrigan is not a Nagurski Award finalist and this upsets CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd. Which isn’t nearly as bad as upsetting Ryan Kerrigan. You wouldn’t like Kerrigan when he’s angry.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel examines the coaches and ex-coaches that will be looked at for new jobs this offseason. Texas OC Greg Davis looks like the frontrunner for Calabasas High School‘s expected coordinator vacancy. Well, if he interviews well.

• SI’s JoePo likes JoePa. I’ve been waiting for so long to write that.

• Oklahoma has approximately 17 scholarship kickers and they don’t really like any of them. Oops.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a compilation of people introducing themselves. It’s better than my introduction implies.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=PEBIw0hHadk

Enjoy your Friday + College Football Saturday.

Ty & Dan discuss the latest in the Cam Newton pay-for-play situation and the need to renovate Husky Stadium, and break down all the Week 12 action.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Idaho governor Butch Otter, who, and it wouldn’t surprise you given the antics of the two most notable football teams in his state, ascended to his current position by simply targeting his opponents and then leading with his helmet. Politics as usual.

*****

Ty wrote his “Thursday Proverbs” column. Read it here and read it NOW. Or, depending on the speed of your Internet connection, a few seconds from now.

• Fox Sports acquired the rights to the first six Big Ten title games. It sounds like win-win — the game and league get the exposure of network TV and viewers get The Best Damn Title Game, complete with a broadcast duo (typically) unfamiliar with calling a college game, and some sort of dancing cartoon representative. We Are. Fox Sports!

• CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd writes about Cam Newton and the Heisman. Because there’s nothing else to talk about in college football. To be fair, though, it’s both preachy and stale.

• Somebody named “blueTunaTiger” writes thousands of unsupported, unverified words on an LSU message board theorizing on a possible Cam Newton conspiracy theory. As soon as CBS Sports updates the Week 6 fantasy numbers, I’d be fine with them running this.

• Colorado and former Colorado coach Bill McCartney have made contact with each other. Aw, how cute.

• Oregon DB Cliff Harris chose the Ducks because they wear green, and “money be green.” That’s some unassailable logic — I got nothing.

• According to a Cal blogger, Stanford QB Andrew Luck is excellent at college football. I’m actually a bit surprised the writer went through with the blog post and didn’t fake a finger cramp to get out of it.

• ESPN’s CFB Bloggers tell you and me what to watch this weekend. All reasonable requests until SEC blogger Chris Low vouched for a “Teen Mom” marathon.

And like every other week, they also make predictions.

• For those of you reading this in the 70+ demo, ESPN’s Ivan Maisel remembers a simpler time for Army-Notre Dame at Yankee Stadium. So smoke your Lucky Strikes, fire up your Glenn Miller album, and read it on your magic, futuristic computer doohickeys.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a new mailbag. If I had recited that sentence out loud and you couldn’t read the word “mail,” it could’ve meant something quite different. And it would’ve been a medical breakthrough.

• A booster and failed banker oversees Auburn’s athletic budget. Good to know.

• Idaho S Shiloh (Shiloh!) Keo tried to decapitate back-up Boise State QB Mike Coughlin and has been suspended for the first half of the Vandals’ game against Utah State.

• A potential NFL lockout will influence Georgia WR A.J. Green‘s early entry decision. “Me too,” Florida QB John Brantley added. “Me too.”

But sadly, there is no joy in Gainesville, mighty Addazio has struck out.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is the trailer for “Cowboys vs Aliens.” You might not even need to watch the trailer to get the gist of it, but since it appears that a lot of money and big names were poured into this, it’s probably worth your two and a half minutes.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKzfMGHdrHE

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Chris Farley (Marquette ’86), who is WAY funnier than Nick Fairley. He also wears little coats in a much more convincing fashion.

*****

• Auburn pulled away late from Georgia to remain undefeated. Both The Wiz and SportsbyBrooks have irrefutable video evidence that Auburn DT Nick Fairley would be satisfied if and only if Aaron Murray was unable to walk until scientific advancements allowed him to do so. Oh and his drive to injure only kicked in when Murray was far out of the play and defenseless.

• Georgia coach Mark Richt will not be the next Colorado coach. Or maybe he will, who knows.

• Three Southern Miss players were shot in a nightclub and subsequently hospitalized. They remain in fair condition.

• TCU offensive line coach Eddie Williamson suffered a heart attack in the first quarter of Saturday’s game against San Diego State. Actually, while we’re at it, will somebody check on Prolate Spheroid Sam?

• Due to concerns over head injuries, Texas RB Tre’ Newton has decided to give up football. Probably the smartest move he’ll ever make. Godspeed.

• Boise State MLB Byron Hout is out for the remainder of the year after breaking a foot against Idaho.

• Illinois plays Northwestern at Wrigley Field this week. It’s a game the BCS would rather you not care about, as it’ll be interesting to watch just because it’ll be interesting to watch. Here’s what one of the end zones looks like. Deliberate human injury seems so likely that it’s already been nicknamed “The Nick Fairley Side.”

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers have conference race updates. Not too interesting, but we’re throwing our support behind Syracuse in the Big East. Not that we can actually see the games, but we’re all in on Doug Marrone. So in the spirit of Ty’s recent reverse jinx success … Go Pitt!

Oh, and there’s also power rankings, which aren’t nearly as cool as our soon-to-be-created Thunderskull Rankings. Which would you rather read? Exactly.

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel has a new College Football Overtime. You probably thought you were just getting Regulation Mandel, and then, WHAM, overtime!!

• The AP’s Ralph Russo is exhausted by the BCS. Perhaps the column of the weekend.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is a collection of inspirational speeches from movies. It’s only two minutes long, but whoever’s in the next cubicle over is DONE.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6wRkzCW5qI

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan go through all the Week 11 action and break down Oregon’s close win on the road against Cal.

Ty and Dan talk with Jerry Palm from CollegeBCS.com and CBSSports.com about the latest round of BCS rankings, the chances of a non-AQ school making the title game, and the possibility of a one-loss team sneaking its way into the big game.  Plus, more Cam Newton news!

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by awful human being Ted Bundy, graduate of the University of Washington, a non-embarrassing academic institution.

*****
• CBS cameras caught LSU coach Les Miles eating grass during the Alabama game. Apparently it wasn’t the first time. This singular act is why college football is light years beyond the NFL.

• This week’s BCS Standings are out. You know they’re legit when an exceedingly average Kansas State team checks in at #24.

• The Denver Post is reporting that Dan Hawkins job at Colorado is safe “for now.” It should be noted that a hacker installed a macro in the computers at The Denver Post that changes the words “absolute dust” to “safe.” Just for giggles.

• Penn State coach Joe Paterno won his 400th game. Word from State College, PA was that the coach celebrated quietly with family and a printout of the names and positions of his current starters. He’ll have it memorized by bowl time, damnit.

• Washington Athletic Director Scott Woodward watched his school lose AGAIN to Oregon, but took the time to call the academics at Oregon an embarrassment. And now a brief non-sanctioned Oregon rebuttal.

1. Woodward probably poops his pants all the time. I don’t know if this is true or not, but my subpar Oregon education never came with a manual explaining whether or not it’s ethical to imply who is and is not a Mr. Poopypants.

2. Woodward is the athletic director at Washington and has nothing to do with how good or bad Washington’s academics is or is not. Your revenue sports are (at best) average, your football stadium is dumpy, and you send out Jake Locker postcards. Congratulations.

• There was an exciting end to a game between two anonymous unranked teams.

• The Pac Twen announced its 2011 schedule. And you thought the next 23 seconds of your life would be uneventful. Ha!

• SI.com’s Stewart Mandel, in his weekly College Football Overtime column,  implies that the SEC would be better served just shutting down football as a conference sport. Or it’s the usual column reviewing the week in college football. I can never tell.

• CBS Sports’s Eric Sorensen grids it up, giving awards to teams, people, and abstract concepts. Everyone will treasure these forever.

• CBS Sports’s Dr. Jerry Palm says the TCU-Boise State battle is “far from done.” Seriously, it’s in the title, why would I make that up?

• EDSBS has power rankings that go on distracted tangents quicker than … ooh I could go for an English muffin. How good are those nooks and crannies?

• LSUFreek has Nick Saban peeing in a bathroom next to a tiger. You may think he’s just putting Saban’s head into a scene from “The Hangover,” but really that’s exactly what’s going on. Kudos, Mr. College Education.

• Another Florida freshman may be in the doghouse. This one is DT Dominique Easley. He’ll either be the best Florida DT ever or will be off the team by December. There’s no in-between.

• ESPN’s CFB Bloggers have conference race updates. We at The Solid Verbal vehemently disagree with the notion that Texas is last in the Big 12 South, as Texas is still very much Texas.

*Note to Ty, if I knew how to autotune, I would produce no less than 17 electronic dance hits with you saying, “Texas is still Texas.” And the chorus would include, “speaking of pedophiles.”

• The Wiz (aka The Kingmaker) has local and national Week 11 reactions and the week’s snapshots. Texas fans seem bummed. Mack Brown Karma is a BITCH.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is an outstanding trick play (via The Wiz).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=0UIdI8khMkw

Enjoy your Monday.

Ty and Dan discuss a crazy week of high-scoring action and a very important statement win by TCU.  Plus, Reverbs and poking more fun at Ty’s locks.

Ty and Dan discuss the breaking news about Cam Newton’s recruitment, play voice messages, read e-mails and break down all the Week 10 action.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Michigan alumnus James Earl Jones. I don’t know how he feels about mgoblog’s general support of Rich Rodriguez, but I felt like posting a picture of the most famous Jones-voiced role, Darth Vader, and thus, I did. Oh and the second most famous would obviously be Mustafa from the Lion King. Another time, Verballers.

*****

• The Big East unanimously voted to become a 10-team football conference. It’s noted that the “obvious” choice is Villanova, while the sneaky pick would, of course, be Alabama.

• Mississippi State DE Nick Bell tragically passed away Tuesday after battling cancer. Thoughts, of course, are with anyone and everyone that knew Bell.

• The Nittany Lion has been dismissed. Or at least the guy inside of him. Wait, that sounded wrong. Ok, I’ll stop.

• LSU Freek checks in with a Bama Hell March. It’s great fun. (via EDSBS)

• Tony Barnhart of CBS Sports and the Atlanta Journal-Constitution thinks Georgia DC Todd Grantham should be suspended for his choke gesture. I have no opinion, other than amazement at the fact that Tony Barnhart is six yards wide in his photograph.

• MGoBlog’s Brian Cook (SVBFF) presents the “Tenuous Case for Keeping Rich Rodriguez.”

• ESPN’s Adam Rittenberg has QB updates on Penn State, Purdue, and Indiana. Whew.

• ESPN’s Andrea Adelson echoes an email that currently sits in the Avery Labels Inbox (first product I saw) — Hawaii is playing extremely well (7-2. 5-0, 6 W in a row) and their game at Boise State this weekend should be ginormous.

• Nebraska QB Taylor Martinez should be good to go for Iowa State on Saturday. Those of you with the most neutral accents should be pleased.

• USC coach Lane Kiffin may have overreacted and pressed a bit when Oregon started scoring quickly. It’s nothing to be ashamed of — every first-time PS3/XBOX gamer does the same thing.

Kiffin also, according to RB Marc Tyler, may have single-handedly lost the game for the Trojans. Woops.

• Fox Sports’s Lisa Horne reviews some under-the-radar players. Keep in mind that Ty and I have already discussed most of these guys over the course of the season, but I always enjoy seeing SDSU RB Ronnie Hillman and WSU WR Marquess Wilson get some lurve.

• The Eugene Register Guard’s George Schroeder (SVBFF) talks to former Oregon coach Rich Brooks about the Ducks’ climb to the top of the college football mountain.

• You’re not going to believe this, but in the coincidence of all coincidences, a Boise State player is being accused of a cheap shot. I know, right? Crazy.

• Following a concussion to Miami QB Jacory Harris, (freshman) QB Stephen Morris is the probable starter for the Canes against Maryland on Saturday.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is John Wall doing the “Dougie.” I have no idea why I like this dance so much, but I do. The dream scenario is getting a “Dougie” video from Doug Flutie. Make it happen!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pry6Cp0kSO0

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Ty and Dan get together on Halloween and recap the Week 9 action, including solid road wins by Oregon and Auburn and tough road losses for Michigan State and Missouri.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by USC alum Joe Francis. Yep, he went to USC. The University of Southern California. In Los Angeles. The Trojans. USC. Fight on.

*****

• Boise State beat up on Louisiana Tech last night, or as SEC fans recall, “Boise State pathetically scraped by Louisiana Tech.”

• Oklahoma State WR Justin Blackmon was arrested on a DUI complaint in Texas while driving home from Monday night’s Dallas Cowboys game, marking the first time Blackmon’s been caught from behind this season.

• Wounded: Wisconsin RT Josh Oglesby is out for the year after undergoing knee surgery, Penn State QB Robert Bolden is not expected to suit up against Michigan after he failed a concussion test, and because of a sore knee, Cincinnati QB Zach Collaros‘s status is still uncertain vs Syracuse.

• A convicted killer chose “Boomer Sooner” as his last words before his execution. While unusual, it was even more rare for the warden to respond with “Statue of Liberty!!”

• USC WR Markeith Ambles has been suspended indefinitely for repeated tardiness.

• Nebraska coach Bo Pelini is looking to shake up the team’s pregame routine. And thus, we bid farewell to Nebraska receivers dipping their hands in construction-grade cement an hour before kickoff.

• The EagleBank Bowl will now be known as The Military Bowl. I apologize for throwing a wrench into what you thought would be a normal Wednesday.

• SI.com‘s Andy Staples issues power rankings. And firmly believes his presence affects the outcome of games. Looks like all the Solid Verbal appearances may finally be going to his head.

• Oregon will probably be wearing silver cleats at USC on Saturday. And for those keeping score, I’ll be the one in the Coliseum crowd secretly and inexplicably gushing over them. I’m weird.

• A Notre Dame student wants the student body to storm the field after the Irish lose to Utah to celebrate the worst senior class in the school’s history. This is even bumming me out. Ok, but not totally.

• Yahoo!!!!!!!!!’s Dan Wetzel is noticing that top high school football players are going to a wider variety of schools. Death to traditional powers! Death to exclamation points.

• Deadspin got ahold of the secret instructions Washington State fans pass around when sending each other the giant Cougar flag that’s waved in every Gameday long shot. NERDS!!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day is people doing awesome things. Because people are awesome. I know because the title says so.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vo0Cazxj_yc

Enjoy your Wednesday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Regis Philbin, who, in rooting for Notre Dame Saturday, is unequivocally anti-United States Navy. But probably for stomach-stomping. That rascal.

*****

• Tennessee coach Derek Dooley compared his team to the Germans in World War II. Improperly.

• Notre Dame lost to Navy on Saturday, but only if cheap stomach-stomps aren’t worth 20 points apiece.

• Michigan State CB Chris Rucker drove recklessly, which violated his probation, and landed him in the clink for about a week. You’ll notice a particularly witty line in the linked story about his “new teammates at Ingham County Jail.” It should be noted that those serving time alongside Rucker are not actual “teammates,” but rather, other randomly incarcerated people. Hope that’s now clear.

• Florida coach Urban Meyer isn’t too pleased with much these days, and that includes Gator practices.

• Texas A&M QB Jerrod Johnson may be close to losing his job to backup Ryan Tannehill. I get the feeling that a bunch of guys in camo are shrugging and find this to be reasonable.

• UCLA suspended two more players for violating team rules. I assume in this case that means they’ve been consistently blocking well and running crisp routes.

• Michigan QB Denard Robinson should be good to go against Penn State on Saturday. Unfortunately for Michigan, it’s no longer a month that ends in “-tember.”

• With Matt Simms hobbled by a sore knee, true freshman Tyler Bray has been taking the majority of practice snaps for Tennessee. Derek Dooley looked at it as being very similar to when the Mongols invaded Helsinki. Or something.

• CBS Sports’s Dr. Jerry Palm says Boise State should probably get used to the waiting game. But that’s the hardest part, Jerry. The hardest part.

• Fox Sports’s Peter Schrager says Texas and Cal are examples of how “crazy” this season has been. Except that Cal has been dancing on the fence that separates “wildly inconsistent” and “just kinda bad” for years now. Beating below-average teams at home and losing to decent ones on the road isn’t confounding.

• Fox Sports’s Thayer Evans calls in on the ThayerLine to recap the weekend action. And because it’s Fox Sports, there’s cleavage, Tom Arnold, and penis jokes. Or so I’m assuming.

• How deep does SB Nation’s Spencer Hall roll? Try 26 deep in this week’s Alphabetical.

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) and SI.com’s Cory McCartney debate the pros and cons of various free trade regulations. Ok, just kidding, they mostly repeat themselves (and each other) while discussing the Heisman on their respective sites.

*****

Today’s Video of the Day looks at how neat nature truly is. Really, it’s Neature.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hm3JodBR-vs

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan talk about Mizzou’s big win, the rise of Auburn, and Navy’s dismantling of Notre Dame. Plus, Verballers ReVerbs.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Arizona State attendee Jimmy Kimmel. It hasn’t happened yet, but if his show ever overwhelms him while on the air, expect the Sun Devil in him to take over, as he’ll flop around faking an injury in hopes that a mercy commercial break will be cut to. Go Sun Devils!

*****

• #1 Oregon beat #463 UCLA last night. Soundly.

ESPN’s Ted Miller was there and evaluated the goings-on.

Statistics were compiled and published. Just like Florida‘s offense but with more digits everywhere.

The Ducks used giant placards with hieroglyphics to call plays. Some of those placards had pictures of ESPN personalities on them, much to the amusement of ESPN personalities.

UCLA coach Rick Neuheisel was not amused by any of the above.

• The Pac-Twen division and championship game details have been set. Now let’s see if people will be able to watch the games on their newfangled picture boxes.

• Notre Dame WR Michael Floyd is questionable for tomorrow’s Navy game. Somebody has to say it — hamstrings are giant a-holes.

• If you’re a fan of Bruce Hornsby‘s piano playing, original lyrics railing against the BCS, and slow motion clips of college football games from the past decade, I may just have a link for you.

• Maryland OT Pete DeSouza hurt himself riding a scooter. Unfortunately, I read this article while riding on my scooter and am now myself injured. Meta-scooting is a bitch.

• The Big Tenelve is changing its championship tiebreaker rules, presumably after Texas was left out of the conference championship game in 2008. I’d love to be on board with this, but it’s become increasingly difficult to feel bad for Texas after they let whatever it was that Oregon beat last night run them up and down the field.

• Oklahoma WR Dejuan Miller will miss the remainder of the season after he tore meniscus in his right knee. The recovery time is about five months, but Miller should be back on the sideline in no time to see the Sooners start losing to inferior teams*.

* ©Bob Stoops.

• A National Guardsman (and Michigan fan) got onto the field with two unloaded M16 assault rifles. It really is a blow to Michigan’s sterling reputation as a state not having crazy backwoods militia types who care too much about college football. Oh. Wait.

• Auburn QB Cameron Newton admits that, despite his success and happiness at Auburn, his heart is still at Florida. This shouldn’t be taken the wrong way — he wanted to finish what he started in Gainesville with the friends he made during his time there. Well, there if Dan Mullen were still there. Let’s not go crazy.

• Two Arizona State football players stole laptops, an XBox, and some XBox games from a dorm room. It’s now officially the most national video exposure the ASU football program has received all season. Pac-10 TV deal!!

• SI.com’s Austin Murphy profiles Auburn QB Cam Newton. As you’d expect from an SI magazine feature writer, the words read good. Doi.

The site also has a midseason report predicting various end of the season outcomes. Apparently, they all still believe in rainbows, unicorns, and Boise State securing a national title berth. And SVBFF George Schroeder loves teams from the state of Oklahoma. Oowee.

• USC may run the some form of the spread offense next year. It’s October 22 and USC is talking about overhauling next year’s offense. Still, some brahs are stoked.

• Arkansas QB Ryan Mallett has been cleared to play against Ole Miss tomorrow after suffering a concussion during last week’s Auburn game. This understandably came as a relief to Arkansas coach Bobby Petrino, who couldn’t offer a quote, as he was running to catch a flight. Wait, did he say where he was going? Oh no … not again!!!!

*****

Today’s Video of the Day honors the simultaneous existence of Skittles and bowling college.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=WjEnVfFmFtA

Enjoy your Friday + College Football Saturday.

Ty and Dan do their first show since meeting face-to-face in Lincoln, Nebraska and rehash VerbaCon 2010 as well as the other action during Week 7.

Ty and Dan preview all the Week Seven action on the eve of their first ever meeting in Nebraska for Verbacon 2010.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Six action and break down the losses by Alabama, Arizona and Michigan as well as the wins by LSU, Auburn and Oregon.  Plus, another rousing rendition of Saturday ReVerbs.

Ty and Dan delve into a few voice messages and some e-mails, and discuss their picks for Week Six.

Ty and Dan review all the Week Five action and talk about another fabulous performance by Denard Robinson.

Ty and Dan plow through voice messages and emails before previewing the first slate of October games in the 2010 college football season.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Dr. Ken Jeong (The Hangover, Community, Kaiser Permanente), who received his medical degree from North Carolina. On now-infamous agent Gary Wichard’s dime. Ok there’s no proof of that. Or is there? No there isn’t.

*****

• Yahoo Sports saddled up, did their best Lester Freamon, followed some North Carolina money and now UNC appears to be, as the cast of Laguna Beach: The Real O.C. would say, “dunzo.” Settle down, Tar Heels, you were always a women’s soccer school, anyway.

Yahooooooooo! also provides copies of documents and an easy guide to the cast of characters involved.

• ESPN’s CFB bloggers went on a group vacation and shot a cool compilation video of their adventures on the nation’s water slides. Orrrrrr they tell you what to watch and predict what will happen during Saturday’s action. Only one of these stories is true.

• Boise State’s Winston Venable was suspended for a half for a hit on Oregon State’s James Rodgers that was deemed helmet to helmet. Or as it’s called in Boise, “fundamentals.”

• SI.com has a triumvirate of college football links: Andy Staples profiles new Oklahoma State offensive coordinator Dana Holgorsen, Stewart Mandel ruffles through the mail, and Jon Wertheim (normally a tennis guy) profiles a Nebraska assistant that has more money than you or me. Unless Mark Zuckerberg is reading this. If so, what up Mark?

• Touted freshman Miami OT Seantrel Henderson may start for the Hurricanes this Saturday. In three dimensions!

• After benching incumbent Dave Shinskie, Boston College will start true freshman QB Chase Rettig against Notre Dame. Suddenly, with all of the different storylines taking shape, this could be one of the more interesting pillowfights of the weekend.

• Everybody’s going to play everybody in the Big 12 next year. For those of you craving yearly Iowa State-Baylor action, your time has come.

• Injured Michigan DB Troy Woolfolk used Google Images to prove his identity after being pulled over and forgetting his driver’s license. Because I’m thorough with my research, you should also know that when you look up “Troy Woolfolk” in Google Images, a first person shot of boobs in a bikini shows up. Just a disgusting act.

Today’s Video of the Day is, possibly for the first time, a football video. It’s Division III football!!!!!!!!

www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-tXkV1_8fk

Enjoy your Thursday.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ty Burrell of Modern Family (on tonight). Beyond Burrell being an Oregon native and Duck fan, his character even referenced the 1995 Rose Bowl beatdown at the hands of Penn State, where he attended grad school. Weird. Thanks Wikipedia!

*****

• SB Nation’s Holly Anderson (Peete) likes Terrelle Pryor to take home the Heisman. The Heisman Pundit does not.

• Oregon coach Chip Kelly received a six year extension, which pays him about $2.4 million a year through 2015. I was this close to linking a Dido song to best express how I felt upon hearing the news, but I held back. Or did I?

• Georgia WR AJ Green, who has been suspended for four games and will make his debut against Colorado this week, first became a person of interest  due to an inaccurate report from TMZ. Honestly, if you can’t trust the integrity of a bunch of dudes with no-lens hipster glasses wearing $93 used t-shirts saying things like, “We have Harrison Ford leaving Koi…”, who can you really turn to? (via Dr. Saturday)

• The Big East wants TCU. And TCU was all like, “Oh hey, that’s, wow, I mean thank you, but you know, I’ve got plans already. Dang.”

• Boise State RB DJ Harper is out for the year with a torn ACL. While they’ll tell you it happened during the Oregon State game, you can never rule out foul play from Boise State safety Jeron Johnson, who WILL NOT REST until he’s the only healthy player on the field. No ACL is safe!!!

• Michigan State coach Mark Dantonio will be back coaching the Spartans this Saturday -- but from the booth against Wisconsin. If Michigan State doesn’t pull away and end it early against the Badgers, thereby limiting any possible tension, it’s almost like they hate their own coach’s well-being. Think about it.

• Boise State has a dog that retrieves the tee after kickoffs. Everyone thinks it’s a pretty cute new little tradition. Everyone… BUT JERON JOHNSON!!

• The Wiz has videos of various CFB cheap shots. The rocky mountain region really seems to like unabashedly injuring people.

• North Carolina State is 4-0. Just thought we needed a reminder.

Today’s Video of the Day is a Durex commercial. Durex: The Official Prophylactic of Today’s College Football Links.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=yyahoTR1Otk

Enjoy your Wednesday. But not too much, horndogs.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Rick Sanchez, the CNN anchor who likes college football so much that he, well, gets torn apart by Jon Stewart (go to 6:20).

*****

• SI.com’s Cory McCartney and ESPN‘s scrappy group of bloggers weigh in on the Heisman race. Cal QB Kevin Riley checks in at 947th and 835th, respectively.

• Alabama QB Greg McElroy has some sore tender bits after Saturday’s Arkansas game.

• Sports Illustrated released this week’s cover, which will hopefully lead to more people arguing that Boise State doesn’t play anyone, and if they played in another conference, they’d be a three-win team. MAX.

• Yahoo’s (!) Matt Hinton loves Auburn’s awesome (and possibly dangerous) pregame tradition. I’ve always wondered if the eagle has ever pooped while swooping around. A swoop-and-poop, if you will. Please let me know at solidverbal@gmail.com, with the subject line “Swoop-and-Poop.”

• Oklahoma State defensive coaches are giving candy bars to top practice performers. I have no objection to this, but it’s the first time I can remember football players being rewarded like puppies remembering to tinkle outside.

• SB Nation contributor (and mgoblog editor) (and SVBFF) Brian Cook breaks down The Week in Schadenfreude.

• SI.com’s Andy Staples offers up his latest college football power rankings. Spare ribs check in at #2, #7, and #14.

• Florida WR Chris Rainey agreed to a misdemeanor plea deal in his aggravated stalking case. It doesn’t seem like Florida fans are too concerned, now that they’ve discovered BURTON-PORN!!!

• A storm was brewing at Kansas State on Saturday. Not in a metaphoric way. Just an actual storm.

• Perhaps wheelchair seating should be moved, uh, away from right on top of the field of play.

• The lines for this week’s games are out. This is a reminded to pay extra special attention to Ty’s picks against the spread. And then run like hell.

Today’s Video of the Day is an instructional video for the New Yorker iPad app, done by Jason Schwartzman. I like his ringtone.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=rKr-E7J-6pQ

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan replay all the Week Four action, including impressive wins by SEC teams, letdown showings by the Big 12, and the dawning of a special new Big Ten tradition.

Ty and Dan make their picks for all the Week Four action and discuss Vegas as a possible location for a Pac-12 title game, suspicious BCS finances, and a host of Verballer messages.

Ty and Dan talk about a wild evening slate of Week 3 games and dissect all the other action from Saturday.

Ty and Dan walk through all the action from Week Two, including the one-day collapse of the ACC, Oklahoma’s barnstorming of Florida State, and curious movies featuring Barn Owls.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Good. Ol’. Rocky Top (woo!). Rocky Top Tennessee. And staph infections. And much-needed shower discipline. Shower at the hotel, LaMichael!

*****

• Auburn unceremoniously beat Mississippi State last night amid thousands of cowbells and panicked MSU playcalling/passing. So an ordinary night in Starkville.

• Temple RB and Solid Verbal Obsession (SVO) Bernard Pierce was average in Temple’s win over Central Michigan last night. He’s just lulling us to sleep before the destruction begins. Cunning.

• South Carolina has now received an official “letter of inquiry” from the NCAA regarding the school’s player eligibility issues. That in mind, Steve Spurrier is still waiting from the NCAA on a “letter of how I should read the 12th green.” Tricky!

• Michigan State LSU Miami Dolphins Alabama coach Nick Saban thinks Boise State should have a more impressive resumé if it wants to play for the national championship. Which immediately convinces me they don’t, based solely on Nick Saban’s life judgement.

• Nebraska has tried to schedule Boise State, but the Broncos reportedly won’t agree to play in Lincoln for anything less than a cool million. So selfish that Boise for wanting to make up the money they could’ve made from a home game. It’s like college football is a huge industry whose members need to reach a bottom line. Or something.

• Mike Leach will have a college football radio show on SiriusXM Satellite Radio. Wonder where I heard that one before.

• USC RB Dillon Baxter will play his first game for the Trojans this Saturday against Virginia. He should have plenty of success against a woeful UVA D, so expect the after party to be BUMPIN.

• Boise State plays football well. For an insane amount of time-eating details, please visit Smart Football.

• Former Notre Dame and Raider great Tim Brown is a college football analyst for ESPN. He also tells you how to bet your money on college football. Fair enough.

• Montana and Villanova could be joining FBS conferences. Let me be the first to welcome Montana to the WAC, and if they’re good, let me also be the first to say that they’re frauds and wouldn’t go undefeated in the SEC.

Today’s Video of the Day is Weezer’s video for their new single, “Memories.” The song is only okay, but the Jackass guys are in it, and that’s enough for me.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Jennifer Aniston, whose father attended Penn State. I have no idea if he cares about the Alabama game, but hey look, there’s Jennifer Aniston! Also, his real name is Yannis Anastassakis, so that’s kinda cool. Go State!

*****

• Tennessee coach Derek Dooley is appalled by his team’s lack of “shower discipline.” Why hasn’t anyone reached out to Bill O’Reilly for a quote? ALWAYS LOOFAH!!!!

• ESPN‘s team of CFB bloggers (including SVBFF Ted Miller) tell you what to look for in this week’s matchups. Surprisingly, none of the writers mentioned “a shocking amount of full-frontal nudity.” I think I just find the phrase “full frontal nudity” to be always funny. Let’s move on.

• The Wiz, aka Jay Christiansen, aka Big Daddy Knowledge Bombs, interviewed ESPN analyst Desmond Howard. Howard had some pretty strong and well-researched opinions about the current state of international free trade agreements and the ongoing tensions between North and South Korea.

• North Dakota State beat Kansas in Lawrence, KS. ND St coach Craig Bohl then turned around and said he was concerned about his team playing in its first hostile environment of the season. At Northern Iowa. Awesome. (via EDSBS)

• Alabama RB Mark Ingram won’t play on Saturday against Penn State – he’s either got too much work left in the lab on a biochemical engineering project, or his knee still hurts. One of the two.

• SI published a column from Jeff Benedict, a Southern Virginia english professor, examining the recent uptick in crimes committed by college football players. While he did next to no research about the LaMichael James case, he also doesn’t make many points other than “crimes are bad” and “football players should be punished.” Soooooo there’s that.

• Vince Young‘s mom is not interested in her son receiving Reggie Bush’s Heisman. She also wants everyone to “leave Reggie Bush alone.” And Britney too – leave her alooooooone!!

• CBS Sports’s Dennis Dodd writes about Penn State QB Robert Bolden‘s uncle – a diehard Alabama fan. I’m sure you see where this is going.

• No city watched the Boise State/Virginia Tech game more than Birmingham, AL. And nobody does it better. Ladies and gentlemen, Carly Simon!

Note: I’m in a weird mood today.

• Terrelle Pryor is telling Ohio State fans to avoid booing LeBron James at Saturday’s Miami game. Dan Rubenstein is telling them not to listen to Terrelle Pryor.

• SI’s Andy Staples and Fanhouse’s Clay Travis both wrote about the AJ Green jersey situation. And how it all makes perfect sense.

Today’s Video of the Day, for no real reason, is Vanilla Ice and “Go Ninja Go” from TMNT 2. You’re welcome.

Enjoy your Thursday.

Hello all, I decided (rather last minute) to do another season of The Postgame Tailgate, my weekly video wrap-up. I generally guarantee nothing in life, but if you don’t like this video series, you’ll receive a full refund by emailing YourMom@Gmail.com.

Anyway, the first episode was kind of hastily put together – there will be much more video and segments etc. as the season progresses. Please be kind.

Note: You can subscribe to the feed for The Postgame Tailgate here.

Ty and Dan announce the details of their affiliation with theScore Radio, channel 98 on Sirius radio, and delve into all the week’s action with Fanhouse’s Clay Travis.

Today’s Chorus is brought to you by Ole Miss, the school that maybe (kind of) gave The Solid Verbal’s favorite rebel a shot to be their mascot. Even though things aren’t looking so good (right now) for the admiral, remember, it could always just be a trap.

*****

• Boise State beat Virginia Tech in DC. Which apparently, in college football logic, is reason enough to focus on why they’re not good and not deserving of anything substantial. **Yawn**

• Say what you will, but I liked the uniforms last night, most notable, Virginia Tech‘s helmets. The matte black was filthy. In a good way.

• Reggie Bush will be stripped of his Heisman. Whatever, that Impala was totally worth it – did you see those rims? SICK!

• Maryland beat Navy 17-14 in Baltimore yesterday, with the play of the game being Maryland LB Adrian Moten’s leaping over the offensive line to cause a Ricky Dobbs fumble. It was done in a way that’s been called, “Something average atheletes would never even think about doing themselves ever.”

• Cincinnati WR and former USC transfer Vidal “VH7″ Hazelton tore his ACL during the Bearcats’ game at Fresno State. Fortunately, given the horrible injury, he will be able to apply for a medical redshirt since it happened so early in the season. Also, I have opposite starting WR Armon Binns in the Solid Verbal fantasy league, so I’m sure he’s at least pumped about that.

• As mentioned above, Admiral Ackbar, for all intents and purposes, has been put to rest as an Ole Miss mascot possibility via an excellent ESPN commercial.

• Alabama and DE Marcel Dareus will not appeal the NCAA’s two-game suspension ruling. Don’t worry, Robert Bolden, it’ll just be some other future ineligible defensive lineman who turns your ribcage into Cream of Nittany.

• CNBC’s Darren Rovell reports on the replica jerseys being printed by schools, and which active players happen to have the same numbers as the ones that happen to be for sale. Also, Florida is still printing Tim Tebow, er #15 jerseys, though there is no longer a #15 on the team.

• ESPN’s Erin Andrews is thrilled to be hosting the first hour of College Football Gameday (Saturdays, ESPNU, 9 AM ET), or as it’s called on the west coast, ZZZZZZZZZZZZ/Pillow Drool/Stagger to Pee time. I’m sure she does a fine job with the SEC/Big 10/Big 12 news and features, it just doesn’t seem fair that, out here, we get this guy.

Today’s Video of the Day is of comedian (and reportedly new SNL cast member) Jay Pharoah doing a dead-on Denzel Washington and Will Smith. I can’t imagine that these two impressions will make SNL funny, but it’s certainly more entertaining than the status quo.

Enjoy your Tuesday.

Ty and Dan delve into the week’s headlines, voice messages, e-mails, and, at long last, previews for the first week of the 2010 college football season!

Ty and Dan put together a pair of interviews with SI.com’s Stewart Mandel and USCFootball.com’s Ryan Abraham. Plus, news about the new website, the pick’em pool, and of course the Solid Verbal t-shirt sale!

Ty and Dan mull over the Mountain West’s sudden expansion with Jeremy Mauss from MWCConnection.com and discuss BYU’s master plan, the conference’s chances of getting a BCS bid, and the potential apocalypse for the WAC.  Plus, voice messages, e-mails, and a brief note about the show’s two-year anniversary.

Ty & Dan discuss the allegations against West Virginia, Florida’s non-conference schedule, Ty’s crush on Brian Kelly, and the town of Moscow, Idaho.  Plus, voice messages, e-mails and news about the Solid Verbal Fantasy League, Pick’em pool, and VerbaCon 2010.

Ty and Dan dig deep for college football news in the dog days of summer and find Lane Kiffin, Jeremiah Masoli, Bryce Brown and angry college presidents.  Plus, voice messages and Verballer e-mails.

Ty and Dan mull over Utah’s move to the Pac-12, Boise’s jump to the Mountain West, and the real winners and losers of conference realignment.  Plus, e-mails, voice messages and another round of “Where in the World is Dan Beebe’s Money?”

Ty and Dan discuss the latest happenings at Michigan, the BCS love letter to Congress, fantasy recruiting infractions, and everything going on in the Verballersphere.

Ty and Dan briefly discuss Oregon’s last turmoil and Admiral Ackbar before delving into a wide array of listener voice messages and e-mails.

Subscribe: http://feeds.feedburner.com/solidverbal
E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: www.solidverbal.com

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Ty and Dan delve deep into the mailbag and discuss Boise State recruiting, NCAA 10, and more scuttlebutt about VerbaCon in Texas.

Subscribe: http://feeds.feedburner.com/solidverbal
E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: www.solidverbal.com

Want to help the Solid Verbal? Take our listener survey!

Ty and Dan review the bowl action (and their lackluster picks) since their last podcast, read some listener messages, and wonder what’s going on with Boise State cheerleaders.

Subscribe: http://feeds.feedburner.com/solidverbal
E-mail: solidverbal@gmail.com
Voicemail: 206-338-1784
Website: www.solidverbal.com